As some of you may remember, I recently traversed the barrier between worker and manager.
I knew it going in, but it is kind of jarring *living* it every day. I have to project an image which matches the role. I can't be *me* anymore. The people who work for me are geeks & gamers. I'm one of them. I can only let a bit of that leak out, as I have a position to play.
As much as I would like to, I can't do earrings. I can't do painted nails. I can't wear floufy things. I feel like I'm hiding (with reason, but I still feel that way)
I guess it is just another role we play. I'm in a position where I am an "Authority Figure". I can't just be the laid back, cool, genderqueer paganboi I identify as. I'm 'Da Man'.
With all the limitations we face, it just seems odd/strange that I have to hide who I am because of my position, but there it is.
If I were a GG, I would still be faced with the same challenge. I would be *expected* to be 'pretty' but hard.
Skill and competency has nothing to do with identity, but I find I am trapped by those expectations. I/You/We are forced to compensate for other people's limitations and expectations.
'Eff'n mundanes....
/swish
- MM