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Thread: In the women's restroom

  1. #26
    happy to be her Sarah Charles's Avatar
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    Granted, I don't have a lot of experience with this issue, but I do have some. Most of my "out in public" time has been in Las Vegas where I try to use the bathroom in my room before going out, family bathrooms where I can find them or the large ladies rooms near the convention floor that normally are well away from crowds. The times I've had to use other, smaller restrooms have all gone on without comment, and I probably attract attention. On one occasion I was using the ladies room in a resturant and while in one of three stalls I heard a woman bring her young daughter in. I just stayed in my stall until they were done to avoid the situation, then as suggested took care of hand washing, hair and makeup checking as quickly as possible.
    Based on my smaller sample and non-passing status, it may be a surprise that I've not attracted this question yet. I may just have to answer, "Yes, but if I were to use the men's room like this I'd get beat up." Then maybe a comment about how much nicer the ladies rooms are, depending on the response. I'll just have to see what happens if I ever face that situation.
    In the meantime, it will be good to watch how those Bathroom Laws develop.
    Sarah
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  2. #27
    Senior Member michelleddg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leslie Langford View Post

    nor the dingo, for that matter ) stole the baby...
    "A dingo stole my baby! A dingo stole my baby!" Hugs, Michelle

  3. #28
    Platinum Member Eryn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dianne S View Post
    Wow, that's never happened to me. I would simply say "No" and ontinue going about my business.


    In the very unlikely event that you are questioned, this is the only response you should make. It is the same response a GG would make.
    Eryn
    "These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
    "She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
    "Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]

  4. #29
    Gold Member DonnaT's Avatar
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  5. #30
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    I don't know what I would do as it has never happened to me.
    Hugs, Carole

  6. #31
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    I don't know where some of you live to get asked a question like that. If you are getting asked that question, what in the world are you doing while in the restroom? I have spent time in all 50 states and many foreign countries (even Texas) in the 45 years or so that I have been dressing as a woman. Not once have I ever been asked if I was a man.

  7. #32
    Silver Member Stephanie Julianna's Avatar
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    Never happened and I take time to check my makeup and hair before I leave. I agree with Jennifer. I like the answer, "Not anymore." if someone asked.

  8. #33
    Aspiring Member GenieGirl's Avatar
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    I've never been asked that and don't know what I'd say if I were asked right of..."Sort of?". I have had a lot of women compliment me in the bathroom which I find a bit odd but whatever I suppose. I had the most interesting comment so far last weekend actually. I was told by a girl when I was leaving the bathroom that I have a really nice walk. I guess I'm doing it right...
    You're a Daisy if you do! -Doc Holliday

  9. #34
    Full Geek Status Adriana Moretti's Avatar
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    I have a good one for you.....I was at Keystone ( dressed obviosly) ....out in public though in a vanilla establishment, NOT the hotel... with about 100 other cd's....went to the bathroom....the ladies line was PACKED WITH CD'S Out the door and around the corner ....
    Guys room...wide open...no line
    So I walked in the guys room and saw a pair of heels squating in the only stall.
    I proceded to use the urinal ( yes...im THAT girl and I had a few drinks in me...)
    as the girl in the stall came out I said..."You totally did NOT See me do this"
    Turns out it was a REAL GG !! And she says OMG..Im in the guys room !!!!...
    Then proceded to tell me either way..its no big deal.
    Which was cool, just wish that was how the majority felt.
    Funny story though.

    I have also had gg's ask me to take pics with them in bathrooms too LOL...

    But still depends on where you are and WHO you bump into I guess...

  10. #35
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    Never had a problem in ladies room, did my business and washed and left as quickly as i could. Now one time when I totally messed up my makeup, way too much concealer and it stuck out. A GG was looking at me in a foyer of a restaurant and my SO said her eyes were bugging out. She never said anything, but i think she was looking closely at my whacked up makeup job.
    Part Time Girl

  11. #36
    Platinum Member Eryn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adriana Moretti View Post
    I have a good one for you.....I was at Keystone ( dressed obviosly) ....out in public though in a vanilla establishment, NOT the hotel... with about 100 other cd's....went to the bathroom....the ladies line was PACKED WITH CD'S
    Things change a bit when there are a lot of us around. Persephone's law states that the chances of being made are proportional to the square of the number of us present. When I'm out with a dozen CDers we're going to be made whether we are in the restaurant or restroom.
    Eryn
    "These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
    "She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
    "Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]

  12. #37
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    We have responses here from crossdressers and responses from transsexual women. I think it would help if we knew who was who. If you are a transsexual woman and particularly "post op", then you are a woman, not a man. You have a perfect right to be in the ladies room and nobody should be questioning that right.

    As a crossdresser, you may not have that right, especially in the eyes of the less accepting person. You can tell the truth, tell a lie (you are already lying in a sense by wearing breast forms and a wig), try to explain yourself or be confrontational. I would say the best thing is to lie (say "no") and leave as quickly as possible. That's assuming, of course that you did your best to look like a woman. If you have a beard, you are on your own, I have no advice.

  13. #38
    Transgender Member Dianne S's Avatar
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    If it makes a difference, Krisi, I am pre-op TS.

    You say: "As a crossdresser, you may not have that right" which I suppose is true. In my particular jurisdiction, though, crossdressers do have that right because the human rights code protects against discrimination on the basis of gender expression and not just gender identity. I really think that approach is the most civilized.

  14. #39
    Aspiring Member Jackie7's Avatar
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    Well I have never had an issue using the ladies en femme, and certainly have never encountered the OP question, but to answer Krisi's challenge, on a couple of occasions in my life (don't please ask for details on this ) I have been that apocryphal bald-headed bearded dude in a gold lame dress, and then I have used the men's room and hiked up my skirt at the urinal. One such time was on the NJ turnpike. I must have looked such a fright that nobody would have dared mess with me.

    And like you, Adriana, my GG wife and I also used the men's at Keystone last month, when the ladies' was crammed with giggling CDs lined up into the corridor and the deserted men's had no line at all.

    I think the answer, whichever room you decide is right in the moment, is to be confident and own it... But also to be brisk and quickly gone.
    Last edited by Jackie7; 04-22-2015 at 09:08 AM.

  15. #40
    Ragin Cajun meganmartin's Avatar
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    Good question although I have never been asked anything in the ladies room.
    Megan Martin

    " some guys play golf, I play girl"

  16. #41
    Aspiring Member jjjjohanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    I've always wondered which restroom the "dude in a dress" (the guy with a beard and bald head but women's clothes and breast forms) uses. There are several on this forum but none have ever answered the question.
    I always use the men's room. I never present female.

  17. #42
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    I've seen many restroom posts so I decided to share one that didn't go so well for the CDer.

    We were at a packed nightclub and I was standing in a long line in the ladies room when in waltzes a CDer, goes to the front of the line (mistake #1), grabs the next available stall, and his feet are facing the toilet as he does his business (mistake#2). When the CDer came out, he did not wash his hands (mistake #3) but proceeded to whip out his phone - like he was going take a selfie (mistake #4). In front of me were five ladies that were together (GG's often go to the restroom as a group). One of them became furious (maybe fueled by alcohol), and confronted the CDer demanding to know if he was a man. He proceeded to argue with the "madder than a wet cat" GG, and told her that he, the CDer, was a woman (mistake #5). I won't repeat what she said but it wasn't pretty. His voice was a dead giveaway. At that point, it was more than obvious that he was a man. He escaped unharmed, however that was not the end of it. The women proceeded to tell anyone that would listen about the "man in the women's" restroom and pointed him out. The CDer kind of stood against the wall by himself - again with his phone. I don't know if he knew that she was outing him to everyone in sight.

    So, just a few suggestions. Avoid mistakes #1 through #5. Leave the phone in your purse. Don't argue if confronted. Leave!!!

    One more thing unrelated to this incident. If you go into a restroom where a mom is dealing with small children, leave - find another place to go. No one wants to accused of being a predator.

    On a personal note, I go out with my SO and his CD friends who all use the ladies room. It doesn't bother me a bit. There are many GG's who just don't care who is in the restroom - but just beware, not all experiences may be good ones.
    Last edited by char GG; 04-22-2015 at 08:44 PM.

  18. #43
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    Paula is right, bathroom harassment is not joke, and I have known folks who have had run-ins in the women's room (even FT TSs.) Laws are only useful after the fact, if they are worth anything at all. A GG can cause a big scene, get an angry husband and/or security involved etc.; it is not like an angry GG will stop and apologize if you tell them their are laws in your area that allow you to use the restroom (if they even believe you. If I were confronted, I would do what sue said, give them a funny look and leave, it isn't worth an ugly confrontation with them.

    Some who wear womens' clothes but present male have answered this question, and they said they use the men's room.

  19. #44
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    i've used the womens room no problem,the trick is sit down on the toilet like a lady and wash your hands..i had only one woman say something at a rest area restroom,i just glared at her she shut up,i finished and me and my wife went on our way..i try to use unisex restrooms or restrooms i can lock the door..

  20. #45
    Member Kevyn53's Avatar
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    The GGs in the women's rooms have always been nice to me. My only bad experience was a 3 year girl came in while I was in a stall and yelled over and over again, "There's a BOY in the bathroom!" Finally she went in a stall, I came out, washed my hands next to her big sister and left. The sister was great.

  21. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by char GG View Post
    I've seen many restroom posts so I decided to share one that didn't go so well for the CDer.....
    Char, had the cross dresser waited patiently, acted appropriately in the stall and afterwards, what do you think the reaction would have been?

  22. #47
    stone free mykell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adriana Moretti View Post
    I have a good one for you.....I was at Keystone ( dressed obviosly) ....out in public though in a vanilla establishment, NOT the hotel... with about 100 other cd's....went to the bathroom....the ladies line was PACKED WITH CD'S Out the door and around the corner ....
    Guys room...wide open...no line
    So I walked in the guys room and saw a pair of heels squating in the only stall.
    I proceded to use the urinal ( yes...im THAT girl and I had a few drinks in me...)
    as the girl in the stall came out I said..."You totally did NOT See me do this"
    Turns out it was a REAL GG !! And she says OMG..Im in the guys room !!!!...
    Then proceded to tell me either way..its no big deal.
    Which was cool, just wish that was how the majority felt.
    Funny story though.

    I have also had gg's ask me to take pics with them in bathrooms too LOL...

    But still depends on where you are and WHO you bump into I guess...
    too funny, glad i read this before bed.... if i read this in the morning their would be no accountability where that coffee would go....
    thanks for the laugh....THAT girl....precious....
    ....Mykell
    i dressed like a girl and i liked it! crossdressing...theirs an app for that those who deny freedom deserve it not for themselves
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  23. #48
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    Its never happened to me but I'm sure I would act pissed and storm out.That way I'm not admitting anything LOL
    I have spoken with a few ladies in the ladies room and it was cordial.
    One said "I love your boots" and one said "cute outfit" to which I said thank you.

  24. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jorja View Post
    I have spent time in all 50 states and many foreign countries (even Texas) in the 45 years or so that I have been dressing as a woman. Not once have I ever been asked if I was a man.
    It's a lot more likely if you don't even remotely pass. Some of us do not. I know people who have been harassed in restrooms. It is also a function of location, not so much in the sense of what state you are in, but more what the people around you are like.

    I mean look - you haven't been murdered either, yet surely you believe murders happen too? Or perhaps your actions render you especially murder resistant? Or perhaps you got lucky?

  25. #50
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nadine Spirit View Post
    Ahh.... the ever debatable bathroom thread.
    Yep! There it is again. Love all the responses.

    How 'bout, "I sure am! Look! See? You were right!"
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

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