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Thread: Transpotting

  1. #1
    Another fine dress AngelaYVR's Avatar
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    Transpotting

    Ok, I've been waiting to use that title and this weekend my ship came in! {intended incongruence}

    I was dressed in a mid-thigh skirt and new shoes [and other things to appease common decency] and was walking down the shopping street when lo and behold, I spot a CD coming the other way. This particular girl was walking with, I assumed due to close contact, her gf/wife and was wearing the blending special - jeans. Anyway, I saw her well before she saw me [take that, blenders! ] but when they both finally noticed me they both looked quite stunned, the gf grabbing the CDs arm and pulling up short. Now, if it had been just the "sister" I would have said hello but seeing as it was a couple I just flashed a smile and kept going.

    This was the first CD I've seen in the wild and was quite thrilled as it sometimes seem I live in a bit of a backwater when it comes to this sort of thing (Vancouver girls are frustratingly wishy washy). Have you seen other girls out and about? Would you have said something?

  2. #2
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi Angela,

    Tough call because I have seen women who could have been MtF but then again perhaps they are not. Some women can present very mannish just as some men have very feminine features and body type. Would I say anything if I saw someone who could be one of the tribe . . . not likely unless she introduced herself to me. BTW, you spotting someone who is blending . . . not a fair assumption as I find that most of us spend a lot of time looking for the tribe in the Vanilla world (guilty as charged myself)

    Hugs

    Isha

  3. #3
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    i'd guess that like everyone else I've probably seen TG's out and about and not realized it. Like you, on those few occasions when I think I have recognized a sister TG, I have given a special smile. If that develops into a conversation, that would be nice but I wouldn't push it. Once in a consignment store I was approached by someone in drab who asked me "Are you trans?" I replied "Yes -- are you?" and the conversation went from there.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  4. #4
    Rachel Rachelakld's Avatar
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    Today while with my wife, the 6ft 4 lass was not dressed to blend, but to show off her long legs.
    We smiled, she smiled
    See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
    http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz

  5. #5
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    I would have responded with a eye contact and a smile. Nothing more.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  6. #6
    Work In Progress LucyNewport's Avatar
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    Everywhere. Seriously we have representatives everywhere. I see our trans and CD sisters on line at the deli, on the train, getting coffee etc. I just try to be cool about it, particularly when I'm in drab mode. When I *Go Out* I don't like the idea that I'm being read, even if I probably am, probably all the time. I got "sir'ed" by a cabbie last night after what was a very fun get together and it popped my ego like a balloon.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Ceera's Avatar
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    I don't get out of the house a whole lot right now, because most of my free time is being spent packing to move cross-country. When I go to the grocery store or whatever I'm usually in a rush and not paying much attention to anyone else. I can't really count Saturday nights at the local gay nightclub where I CD, because I expect to see half a dozen or so 'sisters' there, and I greet them and chat briefly when we meet.

    But in the last few months my daughter and I spotted one CD in Nordstrom's Rack, and I spotted another in Half Price Books. The one at Nordstroms Rack looked uncomfortable, and was kind of rushing to leave after having been in the ladies shoe section. She was presenting moderately well but was pretty easy for me to spot and be certain about. Since I was in full male mode and she didn't look comfortable, I refrained from making it known to her that I had made her. The other one at the bookstore was rather androgynous, but the shoulders ad hands gave her away pretty easily. She was dressed in capri pants, women's flats, a tank top and a contrasting sports bra, with a vaguely unisex short hairstyle. We didn't end up interacting.

    In both cases, no one around us batted an eye at them.

  8. #8
    Aspiring drama queen Isabella Ross's Avatar
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    Eye contact and smile...I think you got it right, Angela.

  9. #9
    Junior Member Cindymay's Avatar
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    What if we adopted the hand sign for the letter "T" sign-language-t-clip-art.jpg

  10. #10
    Daniella Argento
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    Trans-friendly clubs aside we have bumped into other crossdressers before.
    One memorable occasion we were in a shop when a Facebook friend recognised me and co e up and said hello (we were both en femme) it was lovely to chat if a bit awkward at first.
    I have also seen suspected crossdressers out and about but if I dont actually know them I wont say hello.

  11. #11
    happy to be her Sarah Doepner's Avatar
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    A little eye-contact, a smile and maybe a compliment if the situation seems right. I'm not sure how I'd respond to anything more than that, so I'm probably not ready to offer more than the same.
    Sarah
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  12. #12
    Member DeeDeeB's Avatar
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    It has been getting more often I run across someone I recognize as trans, but then there are the trans girls who do pass I wouldn't be aware of.

    I agree, a friendly smile is generally appropriate, but never saying "Hi, I'm trans too". That would be as devastating as calling her sir.

    Dee

  13. #13
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    I've just got to throw this out there…I know I'm treading on thin ice…but….I was just thinking this morning how I frequently see women presenting as men. Although it is a stereotype,and i truly apologize if I am offending anyone often one of a lesbian couple seems to present as 'butch.' And I run into these women all the time. MTF cd's, not so much. I can recall maybe one time I've run into a MTF out and about, but FTM, frequently.

  14. #14
    Aspiring Member phylis anne's Avatar
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    there is one I see in town off and on always dressed in a nice way but her dead giveaay is the dreaded oclock shadow that she has tried to hide with some sort of cover and always in the company of an older women maybe wife ? mom etc looks like she trying to do the rle thing I have always had the wife with me so I have not had the chance to chat I have found from one other experience --- I was at a mall in seattle area and this mid aged girl comes up to and compliments me on my appearance that is if you can call blended tomboy an appearance and the first thing she did to breakk th eice was "I was wondering if we could have a birds of a feather if you will chat"? turned out she had been watching me from a distance and critiquing me ! so the ice was broken she told me to relax my alking style a bit gave me a few facial tips --eyebrows etc she understood my need to stay under the radar (blended ,androgonous) gave me a few pointers there as well but the best advice she gave me was you are pleasing you not them so pretend you are the only one here ,and as many here have said most people don't even notice .all in all we had quite an interaction in the end she mentioned she was trans and of course that started an entirely different discussion the biggest point she made wether t/g or c/d the younger and or neer ones had it a lot easier compared to when she came out what a day to have a t a mall !
    hugs phylis anne

  15. #15
    Gold Member DonnaT's Avatar
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    The first time I saw another CD out at a mall was at Tysons Corner Center in McLean, VA. She was with her SO.

    I only noticed because they were holding hands, and her's were much larger than her SO's.
    DonnaT

  16. #16
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by audreyinalbany View Post
    I've just got to throw this out there…I know I'm treading on thin ice…but….I was just thinking this morning how I frequently see women presenting as men. Although it is a stereotype,and i truly apologize if I am offending anyone often one of a lesbian couple seems to present as 'butch.' And I run into these women all the time. MTF cd's, not so much. I can recall maybe one time I've run into a MTF out and about, but FTM, frequently.
    Maybe you should have not thrown that at all....exactly HOW many women PRESENTING as men have you seen? Really? Because 1) FtM's are not seen anymore than MtFs and 2) just because someone wears a certain type of clothing doesn't mean they are presenting as the opposite gender. Last week I was at a bar where there were 6-8 FtMs (meaning TS's...in my life I don't think I have ever seen a FtM crossdresser). Even in this setting I had trouble telling. Methinks you are using a rather broad brush
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  17. #17
    Aspiring Member GenieGirl's Avatar
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    I see a few out here and there. Some I have made acquaintances with, some I don't say anything to as I assume they are trying to stay stealth and I wouldn't want to ruin that for them or scare them of being outed in public.
    You're a Daisy if you do! -Doc Holliday

  18. #18
    Senior Member lisalove's Avatar
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    So apparently, it's wrong to be nice and corgial to just say hi to people as you walk by them.
    Hmm, I was taught growing up to be curtious and respectful.
    Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.

  19. #19
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    Usually just eye contact and a smile is all you need.
    If a conversation starts then by all means enjoy meeting a sister.

  20. #20
    Member Sarina Curtis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cindymay View Post
    What if we adopted the hand sign for the letter "T" sign-language-t-clip-art.jpg
    CindyMay,

    This might not be such a good idea outside of the States/Canada. In Japan this is a bit of a vulgar gesture depicting a woman's vagina!

    I have yet to go out dressed up so I can't share in that thrill, but I have definitely seen a few transgender folks in my travels around Japan.

  21. #21
    Another fine dress AngelaYVR's Avatar
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    Well, I think if I see another or the same I'll say hi. Waiting for the other person to make the first move is swings and roundabouts, nothing will ever happen (what if they are waiting for the me to "say something first"?) And of course, only when I'm sure with what I'm dealing with, as I was on the weekend. I was just excited as this was the first day-time girl I've seen.

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member
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    Eye contact and a smile, unless I was directly approached then I would have chatted for hours
    Hugs
    Jayne

  23. #23
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    Angela,
    Interesting read, thanks for sharing.

    Once, while shopping for lingerie in a department store as my male self I approached the cashier and noticed a female standing near by. I had taken a long time in the department and had no doubt caught the attention of a few other people. At the time I was too nervous and only thinking about myself but I'm certain this lady was a crossdresser. As it turns out my CC didn't work and she made a forgiving and reassuring comment, which was nice.

    Having left the store, (with my purchase in hand), I wished I'd acknowledged her, and maybe asked if she had time for a coffee. I think talking to someone else would have helped my acceptance.
    Last edited by Married CD; 05-18-2015 at 09:35 PM.

  24. #24
    Call me Pam pamela7's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lorileah View Post
    Maybe you should have not thrown that at all....exactly HOW many women PRESENTING as men have you seen? Really? Because 1) FtM's are not seen anymore than MtFs and 2) just because someone wears a certain type of clothing doesn't mean they are presenting as the opposite gender. Last week I was at a bar where there were 6-8 FtMs (meaning TS's...in my life I don't think I have ever seen a FtM crossdresser). Even in this setting I had trouble telling. Methinks you are using a rather broad brush
    Maybe it's more about clothing styles? Where I live we have a high % of hippies, and the clothing is highly ambiguous. More so tho, having a F2M child and their F2M partner (probably a rarer-than-hens-teeth situation), I'm about it all the time, and no-one notices them at all, whereas people DO notice me, most the time. So i think there is something to the F2M being under the social radar.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
    I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.

    thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er

  25. #25
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I "assume" I have seen a few over the years, one I met in a bar with friends looked like a prime candidate.

    Luckily for me I struck up a friendship and I made a date to go horse riding with her and her friends the next week.

    I stayed at her farmhouse over the weekend and met hr husband and two small children.

    She arranged a date for me with one of her girlfriends and I had an enjoyable weekend.

    No, I never judge what is more than likely a woman who is on the heavier side body wise.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

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