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Thread: Should I Go ???

  1. #1
    How did that happen ? Samantha2015's Avatar
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    Should I Go ???

    Hello all. My question today is for any of you that have attended any of the many conferences/meetings for TS/TG/CD folks. Southern Comfort Conference is in South Florida this year and easy driving distance for me. What would a plain old CD gain from going to this event ?
    I'm a straight / hetero closeted cd. I have zero interest in transitioning…. no surgery, no hormones, no procedures for me. If I can't take it off at the end of the day it's not for me.

    I am probably totally ignorant here but it seems to me most of the issues discussed concern
    TG & TS folk. SCC doesn't have any seminars listed as of yet on the website.
    Do they invite CD's because we kinda look like them so we kinda fit in ?

    If the conference were free sure I might go just to check it out but if I'm paying to attend what would I really gain from it ? Other than a safe environment to be dressed in public and maybe shop at some of the vendor stalls it seems an expensive way to go out for the first time.

    Being closeted I think it would be fun to try and be outside, dressed and passing or trying to anyway.
    But I'm not sure that is really a goal for me. The more I examine myself (thanks to this forum) I think my dressing is maybe more of a fetish. I like all the girly stuff but I sure as hell know I don't want to be one 24/7.

    So I come back to ...worth it for me to go to this conference for a first time out ??
    Thank you so much for any feedback.

    Samantha

  2. #2
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    I can't speak for the conference you mention (although I've heard of it). You say it's fairly close, but maybe you should save your nickels and dimes and go to the next Diva Las Vegas. That would be a fun and exciting function where you could just let it happen - closer to what you're looking for. I'll be there for the next one and the more the merrier.

  3. #3
    Member Bobbie Taylor's Avatar
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    A number of year ago - I attended First Event in the New England area!! It was my first and I wish I could get away again!! It opens lots of doors to what we have been doing behind Closed Doors and it was enjoyable to be dressed 24/7 for the 3 or 4 days!! Great people are there and it's a chance to talk face to face with other Girls!!! Give a shot!!! You will enjoy yourself!!

  4. #4
    "Junior" Member....... JeneeDavis's Avatar
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    Samantha,
    I have been to many Be-Alls and SCC's. I personally don't like the seminars. I have been there, seen that. I go for the camaraderie, and to see my sisters and friends. It is so fun going out with them to shop or to dinner/lunch. I also really like going out at night, dancing, and hanging out with my sisters/friends.
    Once they get the seminar list out you may find that they may offer some things you may find interesting: Hair(wig) Care , deportment classes, speaking (voice) classes. They will have many different offerings.
    For me the cost is too high for all the “extras” that I don’t want or will “use”. I would suggest getting a room there on your own and checking it out. There will be plenty of sisters (and a few brothers) from this site that will attend. You can always try and plan a meeting with one of them (or more!) and see how it goes. I am sure others will chime in with their thoughts. Feel free to message me offline if you want more info!
    Hugs,
    Jen
    Hey! Wanna go Dancing?
    Hugs,
    Jen

    Check out my My Flickr page for my pictures: go to Flickr.com and search for Jenee Davis

  5. #5
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    Conference

    Just thought I would share my perspective. I went to one last year-I won't give a name cause that would not be nice. It listed fashion shows-wig care -dressing tips etc..I spent a few bucks on airfare,taxis,hotels. Even made up a story for the family. I was really excited. I went in drab and that just did not work. Almost every one there had the "Must have Surgery attitude" Needless to say it was a disaster for me personally. All I can think of is to find others who are going that are in your situation and have some friends BEFORE you go. Good Luck.

  6. #6
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    Fort Lauderdale is also a easy drive for me. Just found out about SCC being held there this year. Would love to go, but can't really get enough time off work to actually register and stay. But I may try to get down there for a day.
    Tina

  7. #7
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Samantha,

    "I'm a straight / hetero closeted cd. I have zero interest in transitioning…. no surgery, no hormones, no procedures for me."

    Same her, in the closet CD.

    I can only speak from my own experiences. Last year I attended what is a regular monthly meeting of a support group away from my home town. Nothing as grand as what you're looking at as it only lasted for an few hours one evening. However it was a truly wonderful experience for me to just be able to sit and chat with like minded souls and I'm planning to repeat later this year.

    Looking at the web site for the SCC it does seem as if they do cater well for any first timers with a meet and greet support service. My guess is that if you get to that point the rest will just flow. It's remarkable just how quickly you acclimatise.

    As a result of my 3 hours, I gained the confidence to go , shopping, eat in a restaurant and go to the cinema, all solo and enfemme. To have the opportunity to do those things in the company of others in a safe environment would be such a thrill.

    I'm still in the closet, it hasn't produced a sea change in my life but I'm so glad I did it. So I would say go even if it's just for a day and enjoy.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  8. #8
    Just a touch of class Lynn Marie's Avatar
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    My BFF goes to SCC every year because she's part of the "Vanity Club" which meets there every year. I've gone to Esprit for the last 3 years. I hate to fly commercial and try to avoid long distance friendships, and I hate exclusive groups like the "Vanity Club" so SCC doesn't interest me. I drive to Esprit in a couple of hours, spend a week hanging out with old friends and loved ones, and eat, drink, and be Mary. By the end of the week, I'm sick of wigs, makeup, and lingerie, but I'm totally in love with new and old friends that I've spent the week with. My life is about being inclusive rather than exclusive. I simply like people and cultivate friendships. Oh yeah, and I also hate HRT. If you can throw off the closet mentality for a few days and make a few friends, then SCC can be a life changing experience. As with most everything, SCC will be exactly what you make it.

  9. #9
    Full Geek Status Adriana Moretti's Avatar
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    I never been to SCC but I have been to the a few of the other large Conferences in the united states....and like you have 0 intrest in transitioning., never hit a seminar, or workshop ( none interested me either) ..I did go to the conferences for the social aspect of it, to hang out , party, dance, etc...and they were lots of fun....girls will use the conference as a safe haven to dress for a few days....and it is the perfect place for a first outting because of the comfortable enviorment....you may just actually enjoy yourself...and meet a few people...it will up your game a bit too....

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member Sarah-RT's Avatar
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    What would you gain as a closeted dresser? Not a whole lot if you plan on staying closeted, what I mean by that is if your not going with someone you know, and unless you plan on meeting some friends, there isn't a whole lot to be gained, unless you enjoy the convention yourself but you seem doubtful.

    I'm closeted except to a couple of friends, and I only dress around a few of them too, two of them are gay and we have the national LGBT pride festival this weekend I was planning on going to with them. If they weren't going I wouldn't have a whole lot to be gained, by hanging out with friends at an event dressed I could dress the way I like, experience new things under the guise of being female and have some company, especially from people who I interact with in both drab/drag

    I'm not knocking on you being closeted though, I never thought I'd be out to anyone ever and now I'm deciding on going out in public, but to address that point, going to a convention alone that your unsure of just doesn't sound like fun.

    ****EDIT****

    Oh I looked up what the SCC was, I thought it was to do with the drink southern comfort, I didn't realise it was a trans con, in that case I'll try digging myself out of the grave I commented into and say to go, meet friends and have fun, obviously having a person to go with makes things easier but as a con dedicated to us I don't see why not, unless it's too pricey.

    Sarah x
    Last edited by Sarah-RT; 06-24-2015 at 09:18 AM.
    I cant stand to fly, I'm not that naive. I'm just out to find the better part of me. I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane, I'm more than some pretty face beside a train. Its not easy to be me.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Samantha2015 View Post
    ...Being closeted I think it would be fun to try and be outside, ... So I come back to ...worth it for me to go to this conference for a first time out ?
    Samantha, I have net been but I suspect this is a top reason for many followed by being part of some support group. My issue has always been that I don;t need support. Like you, I know what I am. My wife is fully supportive and I go out on occasion and that's enough "support." If you have never been out, this is a great way to do it with low stress. You don't have to attend any workshop. I think whether you NEED to go out or are just curious, being out is an experience you should have. For that purpose, this is a great excuse and conveniently located.

  12. #12
    Madam Ambassador Heidi Stevens's Avatar
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    Hey Samantha, if SCC is in your backyard, go for at least a day! I was all set to go this year and then they go and move to Ft. Lauderdale. This put it out of driving range for me and I'm familiar with south Florida weather in late September (still hot and humid!) Atlanta is way more convienent for location, weather and things to do. But not my call.
    I'm looking now at going to the Erie Sisters Gala at the end of October. Cooler and way cheaper for the week.
    But no matter where, just go to one and see what being Samantha is like for several days!
    Be yourself. Everyone else is taken!

  13. #13
    Pooh Bear Judith96a's Avatar
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    Samantha,
    I've never been to SCC or anything like it and I can't imagine how I would ever get the opportunity. But... if you know someone else who is going and if, as others' comments suggest, you can be in the vicinity without signing up and paying up for the whole enchilada, then I would encourage you to go for it. Like yourself I'm in the closet but I have managed on occasion to get 24-36 hrs en-femme. If I had the opportunity of 3 days en-femme in a safe and supportive environment I'd grab it!
    Have fun and take plenty of photos!

  14. #14
    How did that happen ? Samantha2015's Avatar
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    Thank you all for your input. I still have some time to think about it.
    I had a few PM's and some said a conference they went to (not SCC) was just a big "pink fog" affair.
    If you weren't thinking of transitioning they didn't want to talk to you. I hope SCC would not be like that.
    If I do end up going I will try to take lots of pics and write a review to post.
    Thank you all again. Samantha

  15. #15
    Senior Member Hell on Heels's Avatar
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    Hell-o Samantha,
    You said "I think it would be fun", which means your thinking about going.
    The only way you'll ever know for sure is to just go.
    I've never been to any conferences, like you, I'm not sure what there would be to gain from it.
    However, I have been out with friends, and it is TONS of fun.
    So, if the opportunity is presenting itself, and your obviously considering going. You have to find a way
    to get past that awkward fear of being seen out and about.
    If you think it would be fun, your probably right!
    Go have fun!
    Much Love,
    Kristyn
    I smile because you are my friend, and
    I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it!!!

  16. #16
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Vanity Club IS exclusive, they rejected me. "We are a special and exclusive sorority whose members are all accomplished & exceptional Transwomen, each and every one being voted in by her fellow sisters. " I guess I wasn't accomplished nor exceptional. I wouldn't really want to be a part of that and knowing a few, it would be exactly what you fear.

    That said, here in Colorado we have Gold Rush...similar but smaller. Many seminars and such. Equal TS/CD ratio. The highlight though is that there are many TGs and many of them go "out" to restaurants and bars. There is a social network before and after the seminar in the lobby of the event. So you will meet people who will introduce themselves and try to make you welcome. I am guess SCC has a bigger group and thus more friendly people.

    Would it be worth going? I would say yes. Mostly because not going doesn't benefit your "growth".
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    Aspiring Member Sarah-RT's Avatar
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    Lorileah! Surely being a mod for a den of scum and villainry as well as being the "ice queen" is interesting and accomplished enough?!



    Sarah x
    I cant stand to fly, I'm not that naive. I'm just out to find the better part of me. I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane, I'm more than some pretty face beside a train. Its not easy to be me.

  18. #18
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    I'm not pretty enough. (their reply). And the few villains here are overwhelmed by the sweet loveable kind friendly members (Did I say that with a straight face?) But it's true, I like the people here
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
    Chief Joseph
    Nez Perce



    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  19. #19
    How did that happen ? Samantha2015's Avatar
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    But Lorileah you were on the cover of Vanity Fair and the Vanity Club still didn't let you in. Sheeezz them some tough gals
    Last edited by Samantha2015; 06-24-2015 at 05:31 PM.

  20. #20
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    Samantha,

    I would think that it could be a lot of fun, but like lollapalooza, not every band is going to be your favorite. I personally can't see using my limited vacation time for that when I would rather spend time with the family. Priorities and trade offs. Tempting though, partial just to see. Plus I think there probably more than a few member here that will go.
    Last edited by Meghan4now; 06-24-2015 at 07:24 PM.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lorileah View Post
    I'm not pretty enough. (their reply). And the few villains here are overwhelmed by the sweet loveable kind friendly members (Did I say that with a straight face?) But it's true, I like the people here
    What? Are they all prune-faced Church Ladies with sensible shoes?

    DeeAnn

  22. #22
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Samantha and all, I have been to the SCC five of the last seven years. I would describe as life changing experience for me. Not because of the seminars, some of which were helpful, but because the girlfriends I met there.

    I'm a closet dresser and had recently come out online here. So many cd.comers were going that I decided it would be good for my first time out dressed and first meeting with other dressers.

    I arrived at the hotel in Atlanta the afernoon of the first day. And, was amazed to see men in dresses everywhere. I had arranged to meet other cd.comers in the bar that evening. I went down in drab. Already deciding I would be ok not dressing the entire week if I neded to. I immediately recognized the group from their online photos. But, they had never seen pix of me, only Sherry. After a drink and an hour chatting with the group I began to feel uncomfortable in drab. Went up and dressed and did comfortably the rest of the week. Altho I'm shy by nature, I soon discovered that I could walk up to anyone in the bar and strike up a chat. It was always filled with dressers, their SOs or SCC staff.

    Most of the attendees were cd,s and a number of them didn't book the conference. Many staying in other, cheaper hotels. I made friends with girls that will last a life time. And, I saw afew again and again at later SCC,s. But, there's only one first time for anything and that made this one very special for me.

    I suggest u go, arrive in the evening and enter the bar. Start chatting with any group that looks inviting. Then, decide if u want to stay for a few days and check in. Or, drive home later that nite if not.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

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