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  1. #1
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    Are you appalled?

    I recently started a Facebook page for my crossdressing self and I've garnered quite a few friends so far - most are really cool, like on this site - and it's fun being able to interact with other girls on social media (with real names and no hidden identities).

    However, I have been disgusted with the many crossdressers who troll FB to find partners for every sexual proclivity there is.

    I keep blocking those who post TG porn or proposition me, but is it my imagination or is our community really filled with that many sexual perverts? That doesn't seem to be the fact on this forum - so, what's the deal on Facebook?

    Oh, and I still get friend requests from men who seem to think that because I'm a crossdresser I'm a s***.

  2. #2
    Diva AbigailJordan's Avatar
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    I've found that too Sandie.. It seems you only need to friend the wrong person and you're suddenly inundated with random friend requests.. and half your page is filled with all kinds of pornography.. I suppose those people have always existed.. and that forums like this don't really suit their purpose.. which is fortunate for us

  3. #3
    New "old" girl Suzie Petersen's Avatar
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    And we wonder why some people have a negative impression of CD'ers!

    It is very sad, if you ask me.

  4. #4
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    Hah, welcome to the rest of the internet! The problem isn't Facebook, because this happens everywhere. Perverts are everywhere, CD.com is just squeaky-clean.

  5. #5
    Junior Member Tristessa's Avatar
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    IS CD.com really "clean"? I'm not directing this at anyone in particular, but since I've become more active here (particularly since I posted a profile pic), I've been getting friend requests from some members that have had accounts for YEARS, but have a very low post count (fewer than me). This seems a bit suspicious to me, as I honestly can't figure out why someone would frequent a forum that they don't actually participate in. Maybe they do most of their communicating by private message? I don't know, but it does make me wonder whether they are here primarily to ogle our pics. Am I just being paranoid?
    Tristessa

  6. #6
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    No you're not paranoid, you're actually right. While it's not immediately apparent, it's still everywhere on CD.com. Most peeping toms on CD.com at least have the decency to pretend they're CDs themselves, for a very long time in some cases. What makes CD.com clean is the fact that obvious sex subjects aren't allowed, but we can still have panty threads, can't we?

  7. #7
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    Reine, I have no problem with those who stretch the boundaries of sex. Porn is cool... when you are ready for it. And I believe that if what you're doing does no harm to anyone, then go for it.

    However, to immediately make sexual advances or send porn to someone you don't know (and has a website or page that is obviously more on the fun side and even warns that this type of behavior is not welcome on that page) then you have stepped over the line. No means no. And even though I support a persons right to let their freak flag fly, you don't have the right to shove it in my face when it's not welcome.

    If you have a crossdresser page or website with dirty pictures of penises, fine. Just be sensitive enough not to pull it out where and when it's not welcome.

  8. #8
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sandie70 View Post
    However, to immediately make sexual advances or send porn to someone you don't know (and has a website or page that is obviously more on the fun side and even warns that this type of behavior is not welcome on that page) then you have stepped over the line.
    I agree with you, but honestly I think that a huge chunk of CDers (re the millions of racy website results on Google) take it for granted that it is sexual and they assume this must be so for every other CDer. Right? People have a hard time imagining that anyone could be different from themselves.

    If you are getting so many unwanted advances, I think this indicates the norms of what is out there. Only a few hundred CDers post regularly in this forum compared to hundreds of thousands of CDers there must be in the US alone. A lot of them join (there are a few thousand people who have logged in during the past few months), but then they move on and rarely post, I assume because their cup of tea is more on the sexual side.
    Reine

  9. #9
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    Yeah, a FB crossdresser page is like a pervert magnet. I remember hearing Vera Wylde saying the same thing a while back

  10. #10
    New Member from Scotland paulinescotlandcd's Avatar
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    I have been inundated with requests from all over the world. You get used to blocking and just ignoring them.I recently changed my profile picture to something very boring and the requests have fallen away!

  11. #11
    Aspiring Member Joni T's Avatar
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    That's exactly why I don't FB.
    Joni

  12. #12
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    By the way, I've mentioned often on this site that I'm bi, so it's not being attractive to men that's the issue. No, you would have to see the notes I get from men in drab and some crossdressers I don't know - not a bit of subtlety to any of them.

    If a guy shows me respect and is intelligent and has more to offer than "you want to see my pee-pee?", then I'm open to being friends.

    And where was Hugh Grant years ago when he picked up that crossdressing hooker in Hollywood and got busted? If he had knocked on my door that night, I wouldn't have had a prudish bone in my body and his agent wouldn't have needed to bail him out of jail (lol).

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sandie70 View Post
    If he had knocked on my door that night, I wouldn't have had a prudish bone in my body and his agent wouldn't have needed to bail him out of jail (lol).
    Works for me...

    DeeAnn

  14. #14
    MissSwissMiss LexiNexi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joni T View Post
    That's exactly why I don't FB.
    Joni
    +1 plus one

  15. #15
    Aspiring Member Sarah-RT's Avatar
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    I recently set myself up a Facebook page, browsed a few other profiles of crossdressers and now all the groups and pages it's suggesting to join are all sexual based or a bit more "fetish" based.

    Thanks, but no thanks. I'd be happy to add any of you gals here though once I get a few things with the privacy sorted
    I cant stand to fly, I'm not that naive. I'm just out to find the better part of me. I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane, I'm more than some pretty face beside a train. Its not easy to be me.

  16. #16
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    You have to consider the source Sandie. A lot of people consider FB a dating site with fresh fodder. I get the same as you but just ignore the wackos. I have a lot of good friends who are mutual to both sites. BTW the name I use on FB is Ericka Richards a name I formerly used here.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  17. #17
    Work In Progress LucyNewport's Avatar
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    I think this site is fairly safe, in general. As with anything on the world wide web, post at your own risk, it never goes away. I do find it funny how most message boards (cd.com included) are like 90% lurker though!
    The struggle. She is real.

  18. #18
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    You are inviting this sort of response by posting as a crossdresser. It may not be right, but it's reality. Personally, I don't put anything about my "hobby" on Facebook and I only accept friend requests from people I know or friends of people I know.

    As for this site being safe, it's a safe as you make it. Don't use your real name, don't post your town or city, don't post personal details and don't show your face and it's pretty safe. Ignore the above and you might be in trouble in various ways. Of course, it also depends on your level of stealth. If you normally walk around your neighborhood and town dressed as a female but with no attempt to disguise yourself, you're already out and you don't need to worry too much about the Internet.
    Last edited by Krisi; 07-13-2015 at 03:56 PM.

  19. #19
    Gold Member ~Joanne~'s Avatar
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    There are a lot of admirers out there, finding you and harassing you is just a lot easier on Facebook than it is any where else. They probably figure because you are there that you are free and looking, at least from their point of view. I have an account for my drab self and with all the spying and cross posting that goes on there, without any consent or whatever, I'd never get one for my fab self.
    Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!

  20. #20
    0 to trans in 60 seconds! Donnagirl's Avatar
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    I have a Facebook page with more people (and I use that term in its most generic) blocked than I have friends... But... Facebook has introduced me to lots of other, more local gals and quite a renewed social life. I actually wouldn't be without either, Facebook or this place, both have their pros and cons and collectively they cover the spectrum of need...
    Call me Donna, please

  21. #21
    Diva AbigailJordan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    You are inviting this sort of response by posting as a crossdresser. It may not be right, but it's reality. Personally, I don't put anything about my "hobby" on Facebook and I only accept friend requests from people I know or friends of people I know.
    I'm not sure that's entirely true.. it's thinking along the same lines that women who dress provocatively are inviting some kind of sexual advance. Just because we choose to have a social networking presence for our femme side that isn't necessarily connected to our regular profile. I hear that you say it's not right, and yet your opening line clearly places the responsibility on us for posting as a CD.

    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    As for this site being safe, it's a safe as you make it. Don't use your real name, don't post your town or city, don't post personal details and don't show your face and it's pretty safe. Ignore the above and you might be in trouble in various ways. Of course, it also depends on your level of stealth. If you normally walk around your neighborhood and town dressed as a female but with no attempt to disguise yourself, you're already out and you don't need to worry too much about the Internet.
    Obviously nobody should post personal details on here, but as for the not showing your face part, I don't see that as an issue. Had a pic on here long before I came out in my local town. After all, the only people who are going to "discover" your dressing from a pic on here are people already looking at a crossdressing forum for some reason. Yes there is the maintenance of reasonable internet privacy, there is also irrational paranoia about being outed.. sadly the line between them is often blurred but fortunately it's location varies from person to person.

    I guess it all depends how far out into the world you wish to push yourself.. for some of us it's behind closed doors.. for others it's out and about.. but lilke anyone else in this world, we should still be free to push as far as we want without being subjected to unwanted harassment/abuse/attention.
    Last edited by AbigailJordan; 07-14-2015 at 01:36 AM.

  22. #22
    Full Geek Status Adriana Moretti's Avatar
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    I know your new to facebook....but...if you use facebook smart, and dont post in the public crossdressing tg groups, those people cant find you. If your posting pics in these public groups you can bet your life that people will bother you. I am NEVER EVER bothered, because those people cant find me..or maybe I'm just ugly... I just dont post my pictures in the groups...they are a breeding ground......i did notice on your facebook page you DONT post in these groups though ( from whayt I can see ), which leads me to believe they are getting acces to you through the comments you leave on OTHER peoples page or simply one of your facebook friends , so I'd question some of the friend requests you made, or comments you left on perhaps a questionable place. I figured that out the hard way and like i said nobody bothers me....or im ugly....could be that too xoxo

  23. #23
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    Ugly... HAH! you are gorgeous Adrianna! And I love your approach to all this, I want to be you when I grow up.. !?

    Edit: Lucy, I've been on Vbulletin boards not related to CDing and it always appears there are lots of lurkers, but it turns out most of them are bots.. googlebot, etc. They are automated info gathering software. This became apparent when a site was abandoned, and they were still lurking.
    Last edited by JessicaJHall; 07-13-2015 at 06:01 PM.
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  24. #24
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tristessa View Post
    IS CD.com really "clean"?
    We are as close as one can get to the Clorox or Domestos of the CD fora universe! But no public forum is completely free of this aspect of life... Sex is one of those inexorables of the human condition...

    I think here, we're more CDs that push the TG end of things a fair bit - not everyone here, I know - but we are a tiny minority in a CD world that majors in sexual and fetish activities... which is why the vanilla world often equates CDing with something more sexual. It's a toughie - but another jolly good reason why we should all be happier about being under that big ole TG umbrella that conveys a degree of respectability around why we do this if the 'why' is rooted in a need for expression and presentation that has its foundation in our gender identity (without implying that all of us are dysphoric, 'coz we're not. ) - education is key!

    I'm not often up for defending FB (Spawn of !) - but it's just a tool: it's the people that use it that are the issue...

    Now - I feel honour bound to address this:

    Quote Originally Posted by Sandie70 View Post
    And where was Hugh Grant years ago when he picked up that crossdressing hooker in Hollywood and got busted? If he had knocked on my door that night, I wouldn't have had a prudish bone in my body and his agent wouldn't have needed to bail him out of jail (lol).
    Not that there would be anything morally wrong with Hugh, but the 'lady-of-the-night' in question (Divine Brown) was in fact a GG - happy to now refer to her trick that earned her $1m... (2010 Daily Mail article here) I think I might even consider shagging Hugh for $1m, dressed or not... 'course, he is getting on a tad now (but so am I...)

    Quote Originally Posted by Adriana Moretti View Post
    I am NEVER EVER bothered, because those people cant find me..or maybe I'm just ugly...
    Adriana... you're way too cute... those people are just plain SCARED of you..

    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  25. #25
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    You're right Katey. I must have gotten this mixed up with an incident with Eddie Murphy, who in actuality got into a little bit of a mess with what the press called a "transvestite hooker."

    But the part about Hugh knocking on my door still holds (lol).

    Oh, and I do understand there is a wide range of sexual flavors out there and, again, I'm OK with whatever people want to do as long as no harm comes to someone, but this thread was about the worst of the worse... like one crossdresser whose first message to me was "do you like little boys? I do."

    If that's not a pervert, I don't know what is.
    Last edited by Sandie70; 07-14-2015 at 03:52 PM.

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