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Thread: Roommate disruption

  1. #1
    New Member
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    Roommate disruption

    My wife and I have always been open regarding my crossdressing, where I can lounge about the house in whatever strikes my fancy. Be it leggings, pantyhose or full on fem, it's been a safe place. I've been encouraged to be the person I want to be.

    We recently took on a roommate, and it's such that the only person it really interferes with is my femme half, which is not fair to either the roommate or my wife.

    I'm only mildly put out by this, but in the long run what would one do to keep things on par privately?
    -Danielle

    emails are not allowed

  2. #2
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
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    In the long-run....?

    Lose the roomie, or take on one who accepts (or at least, doesn't care about) your crossdressing...

    Not to be facetious, but I'm assuming you've opened house to someone else to help financially, and nothing comes without a cost. My wife and I thought about letting a room recently, but we agreed the loss of privacy was not worth the financial gain - nothing to do with my CD side, although it's fair to say I wasn't disappointed when we agreed not to...

    I don't think you have a magic solution to this - it's a question of expediency and what is more important to you at the moment... I do feel for you though - had my eldest son convalescing with us after a leg op over the past 6 weeks... that did limit my opportunities somewhat...

    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  3. #3
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi Danielle,

    I guess it really depends on as Katey indicated, the reason for the roomie. Are you just doing someone a favor by lodging them for awhile or is there a practical reason (e.g., monetary). If it is just a favour, then you could simply let the roomie know his/her stay will be coming to an end soon (when you have had enough). If it is for another reason, I would either have a talk with the roomie (if you don't mind outing yourself) or get someone who will understand. If neither of those works, then you may have to consider finding private time when the roomie is not around.

    Cheers

    Isha

  4. #4
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    Hi Danielle, The law of motion applies here, (For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction) .
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

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  5. #5
    Platinum Member
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    How long do you expect to have a roommate?
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  6. #6
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Atlegs, I feel your pain. My fiancee's daughter was with us for a week. She is bipolar with no boundaries and no filter. Because she brought little clothes with her she was constantly going into her mom's closet to help herself to her mom's clothes. We have a shared closet with a door at each end. My fiancee was constantly yelling at her to get out of her closet and ask if she wanted to see something. Had she wandered over far enough she would have run into my clothes which are in the middle area between the two sides. If that had happened, she would have announced to everyone that I was F'ing (her favorite adjective) transvestite. She wore some of my panties she found in the folded laundry much to my chagrin. Needless to say I could not dress, even a night gown while she was here. Well she finally left and then my fiancee ran into an old friend who was somewhat homeless and needed a place for a week. It took two weeks to get her out. I only regained my place earlier this week. It was so relaxing to get dressed as I please.

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member Sarah-RT's Avatar
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    Danielle, it's very understandable how the new lack of privacy can affect you, since you and your wife are allowing someone into YOUR home you get to set the rules. If this room mate was to smoke indoors and you didn't approve you would ask them to go outside to do it, while you may find it uncomfortable to discuss your dressing with a new stranger, if you can get to know them a bit you can get to the point of explaining what goes down and if they don't like it they can leave.

    If you do need a third housemate to split the bills you could advertise on LGBT forums perhaps to get a more suitable tenant or when advertising you could make clear that only tolerant people need apply.

    Sarah x
    I cant stand to fly, I'm not that naive. I'm just out to find the better part of me. I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane, I'm more than some pretty face beside a train. Its not easy to be me.

  8. #8
    Reality Check
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    Didn't you consider this before you got a roommate?

    The solution seems pretty obvious - lose the roommate.

  9. #9
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    I hope there is a plausible reason for taking in a roommate. Surely you could have foresaw there would be some pamper put on dressing. If you need the roommates money to help with paying the rent or mortgage, then I'd say you have to suck it up and limit your dressing to your private space. If you do not need the money, then put a time limit on the house guest to leave. You indicate your wife also enjoys your femininity, so you and her need to discuss this inconvenience to your lifestyle.

  10. #10
    Member ambigendrous's Avatar
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    Not a roommate issue but my wife and I babysit our 4 year old and 6 month old grandsons all week. We have agreed that they don't need to get to know this side of me so my dressing is limited to after 6pm (when their parents pick them up) and on weekends. It doesn't really bother me - sure; I'd love to be free to wear whatever I want whenever I want, but peace in the family is number 1 on my priority list.
    Ambigendrous
    Wealth should not be measured by how much you have, but by how little you need - anon

  11. #11
    Junior Member
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    My wife is comfortable with the fact .I wear women's clothes. However, she categorically opposed to have seen children or someone else. But when I wear tights under the Bathrobe she says nothing

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