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Thread: Houston we have a problem.

  1. #1
    Junior Member thisgal16's Avatar
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    Houston we have a problem.

    So about a month ago, I went out to a local meetup group meet and since then I have had zero interest in dressing or doing anything femme. I thought the lack of feeling would pass but it hasn't and it seems to only be getting worst, to the point that I'm considering getting rid of everything. I'm completely lost and don't know what to do. I know I don't post here often but any advise would be greatly appreciated.
    Jennifer

  2. #2
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    Hmm, is it really a problem? I know I gave up cold turkey about 20 yrs ago and didn't think about it at all until about a year ago when the pink fog rolled in, and turned into a full blown hurricane! If you WANT to feel femme and we're maybe discouraged by the meeting try checking out you tube for some inspiration, I like Denver Williams myself for the cd angle!😃

  3. #3
    Careful I bite <3
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    My advice is that if you can figure out how to do it, don't purge. Especially if you have nice things. Replacing them will be a pain later.

    Either way long periods of time without dressing should be just fine for a run of the mill Cross Dresser. What do you think is causing you anxiety about not dressing?

  4. #4
    Another fine dress AngelaYVR's Avatar
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    What sort of group was it? If it was the stereotypical misery session that some groups are known for then try a good dose of something fun while dressed.
    What always interests me is that when we read stories like yours, there is always a tone of sadness. You don't sound happy to lose your mojo so just sit tight for a bit and look at shoes online (always gets my girl side purring).

  5. #5
    New Member AutumnCD's Avatar
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    I have the same types of feelings. The willingness to dress seems to come and go. Unless it's necessary, I wouldn't get rid of your clothing. If and when the feeling comes back, you will be relieved that you kept everything.

  6. #6
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    I would suggest that you pack it all away and place it somewhere out of the way for now. When the urge comes back, and it will, you will have everything.

  7. #7
    Cyber Girl Bridget Ann Gilbert's Avatar
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    I agree you shouldn't purge, but don't try to over analyze yourself. If you don't feel the need to dress then don't force yourself. The feelings will come back eventually, they always do. Part of being a CD is accepting yourself in all circumstances.

    Bridget

  8. #8
    Member VanTG's Avatar
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    I would follow what Jorja says, and just put it away for the time being. You never know the feelings might be suppressed right because of some shame or something like that. Keep it or you might be posting in a month saying you regret it.

    You are still on this site so there are is obviously something still there.

  9. #9
    Banned Spammer
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    Yes pack it up and save it for later.
    Remember we all go thru times where dressing isn't what we want to do.
    There is middle ground just find the balance point.

  10. #10
    Call me Pam pamela7's Avatar
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    i had a similar reaction to one group i attended. don't purge, you just didn't find the right group or environment.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
    I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.

    thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er

  11. #11
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi there,

    This seems to be a common theme for many . . . urge disappears . . . tempt to purge . . . urge comes back. I would take the sage of advice of many here . . . don't purge but pack away (the desire to purge is your own sense of shame). Store your stuff and go on with your guy life. It is most likely the urge will return with a vengeance and if you purge, you'll have nothing to deal with that urge not to mention it will be expensive.

    Cheers

    Isha

  12. #12
    Senior Member
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    Isn't it lovely how, in this bizarro crossdressing world, the loss of interest in crossdressing is considered 'just a phase'? They're right though: we all have a strong pro-CD bias, but it probably will come back. Don't purge.

  13. #13
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    Hi,

    Reading your post it's not clear whether it was the meetup session or the act of CD'ing that put you off. Maybe it doesn't matter. I'm sounding like a broken record, but most if not all of us have gone through similar periods. There probably have been a few of us who have gone "cold turkey" and never looked back, but I'll bet they are in the (vast?) minority. My purge period lasted for 20 years at least ... after which time my old clothes would not have fit anyway (and they certainly would have been out of style)! But when the pink Fog came back, it was here to stay.

    There certainly is nothing wrong in saying "This is not for me", and it's your call. Good luck whichever way you decide.

    Hugs, Claire
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  14. #14
    Platinum Member
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    Hi Jenn, Crossdressing is like the Mafia, You just can't quit.

    Store your things because you WILL be back.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  15. #15
    Banned Spammer
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    Quote Originally Posted by BLUE ORCHID View Post
    Hi Jenn, Crossdressing is like the Mafia, You just can't quit.
    Lol, can I steal that please?

  16. #16
    Platinum Member
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    It's only a problem if you make it one. Many of us have had long period of low interest. It seems always to return.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  17. #17
    Aspiring Member JeanetteX's Avatar
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    Haha very good one Blue Orchid....but at the same time so true!!!

    Conclusion....don't purge, but store

  18. #18
    Member stacy956's Avatar
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    I would suggest to put all your stuff in a box and you will it will be back and even more than ever😛

  19. #19
    Reality Check
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    There's no law that says once you start crossdressing you have to continue. If you don't feel like crossdressing, don't.

    Getting rid of everything is entirely your choice. If it's valuable and you have a place to store it, that may be wise in case you wish to start dressing again. If not, toss it (donate it to charity) and don't look back.

  20. #20
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    Store your clothes, don't purge. You might want to change your avatar, but only temporarily. The desire will come back to you eventually. If not, you're not a crossdresser.

  21. #21
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
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    As people are advising, store your stuff. Then relax. Don't feel guilty or that you "should" be dressing. If you don't feel like it, then you shouldn't be. And consider why you might have stopped -- did the group's reality conflict with your inner vision of yourself? Did you feel pressure to go further than you were willing to? Was it just not a personality match? You could be suffering a "mental concussion" from meeting the others. There's a high probability that it will pass. Give it time; give yourself space. The most important thing we have to allow ourselves is forgiveness.

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member msniki48's Avatar
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    Jennifer

    My therapist told me [ when I was not dressing ] When you need her, she will be there... when you don't, don't worry about her. you are being yourself either way.

    don't feel the need to throw it all away... unless you have money to burn, as she will come back again and tap you on the shoulder.

    hugs

    niki
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    Hugs, msniki48
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    http://nikishomeawayfromhome.spaces....x?sa=764853634

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by msniki48 View Post
    as she will come back again and tap you on the shoulder.niki
    Or smack you upside the head with a baseball bat.

  24. #24
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    A plastic bag and mothballs can be a girls best friend.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  25. #25
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    I kind of went through the same thing back in April.
    I went to a couple of places by myself dressed up (Post Office and Fred Meyers. See link below for the story.)
    Nothing bad happened at all; I really enjoyed it. It was not my first time out by myself, but it was the first since my new look. I felt way better and way more passable than recent trips out.
    Then after that I just went on a hiatus. The only things I purged were pictures. I only recently retrieved many off of my phone. I did not purge any clothes or heels.


    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...et)&highlight=
    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

    -Home Movies
    (cartoon series)

    Shoe size: 9 US women's.
    Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
    Height: 5' 6".

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