Crossdress vs. Transgender

[Pat]

Even the term "American" is wrongly used, because it makes people forget that America is much more than just the U.S.

Actually, the term "American" is used quite correctly. You may be thinking it's not sufficiently differentiated from North American or South American, but those terms are used when referring to people by their continent (e.g. European, Asian, etc.) When referring to people by their country of origin, people from Canada are Canadian, people from Mexico are Mexican and people from the United States of America are... Unitian? no. Statsian? no. Ofian? no. American -- yes. There are many countries with "United" in their names; many with "States" in their names but how many with America in their name?

African-American is a colloquial term born out of the time in the 60's when we were searching as a country for a way to have a discussion about race without using inflammatory terms. It's not a clever or especially correct term, but it was the term we could use without starting a fight. We know it's stupid. The rest of the world doesn't have to use it.

[Clodagh]

Can somebody create an app or even just a flowchart to help people find their correct label?

Q1 Do you consider yourself a man, a woman or something else
Q2 Do you presnt the majority of the time as a man, woman or something else
Q3 and so on...




Not serious




Kinda Serious

[stefan37]

Judging by the arguing and debates about labels. They are only useful for the individual that wants to use them. I have my interpretation and others have theirs.

I use transitioner or transsexual to describe me. I know other transitioning individuals that find the term transsexual offensive. Debating labels on this forum or anywhere for that matter is an exercise in futility.

I made the comment ( which I stand by). That those that have a compulsion to express as the opposite gender (regardless of their identity) have some degree of TG or even GD. Which most likely would explain the discomfort when they don't get time to express that part of them. It is a very complex phenomenan and most will be in denial to acknowledge.

[xoMindyxo]

I am a crossdresser/transvestite, and, I also consider myself transgender. It's how I feel and no one will take that away from me. No elitist with a stick up their behind is going to tell me otherwise .

[stefan37]

Nobody can tell you how to label or identify.

[ReineD]

Nobody can tell you how to label or identify.

I know Stefan, and I think this is why people need to get away from the terms "CD", "TG", or even "TS" to identify themselves since they will encounter people who choose those same words to identify THEMselves even though they ascribe completely different meanings to them.

IMO, it is best in this forum (not to strangers who deserve no explanation unless you want to give it) to simply say what you do, whatever that may be, for example:

"I identify as a woman, but most of the time (or part of the time) I present as a man. I am on hormones (or I do not plan on modifying my body) and I will continue to present as male (or not) for work until my retirement in 2 (or 15) years".

or

"I identify as a woman, I am beginning the process of transition and plan to live as a woman full-time, however I am not yet sure if I will have SRS (or I've scheduled SRS with Dr. x, yippee I can't wait!)".

or

"I identify outside the binary gender structure (I am agender, gender-fluid, bigender, or whatever) and I fluctuate with my gender presentation, sometimes presenting male and sometimes female (or I present androgynously).

or

"I am fully transitioned legally, socially, and physically. Life is great".

or

"I dress for fun and love being a guy the rest of the time. Life is great".

You get the idea.

[Samantha Clark]

Thank you, Reine, for being a sensible voice in what seems to me to threaten to devolve into a Tower of Babel.

[mechamoose]

Nobody gets to challenge who I say I am.

Period. Full stop.

I'm 'complicated'. I don't need to justify myself.

<3

- MM

[Mayo]

Why We Need to Stop Policing the Gender of Men Who Like ‘Feminine’ Things (YouTube video w/transcript)

"You can be a man who very much enjoys being a man, but also enjoys wearing makeup or dresses. Jaden [Smith] wearing a dress doesn’t change his gender, unless he wants it to."

[AlyssaS]

I don't know how to classify myself. I desperately want to have curves like a female -- breasts, waist, hips, butt --, and have no facial hair and less body hair. I have long hair (well past shoulder length) that I often where in a high ponytail. However, I find the idea of having a vagina/female role in sex repulsive. I love the male role in sex, and want to keep that. Temporary padding and crossdressing used to be enough for me, but more and more I feel satisfied for less and less time after being dressed.

[Ezekiel]

Actually, the term "American" is used quite correctly. You may be thinking it's not sufficiently differentiated from North American or South American, but those terms are used when referring to people by their continent (e.g. European, Asian, etc.) When referring to people by their country of origin, people from Canada are Canadian, people from Mexico are Mexican and people from the United States of America are... Unitian? no. Statsian? no. Ofian? no. American -- yes. There are many countries with "United" in their names; many with "States" in their names but how many with America in their name?

Well, I think the United States should start thinking about finding a more appropiate term to use instead of "American" to refer to its citizens. Not only the U.S. is America, but the U.S. is part of America, just as much as any other country in the continent.

The term "America" is too broad to be monopolyzed by the U.S.

[Dianne S]

The term "America" is too broad to be monopolyzed by the U.S.

You're fighting a losing battle here. As a Canadian, I don't consider myself "American". "North American" maybe, but not "American".

In fact, there is no continent called "America". There's one called "North America" and another called "South America"; just plain old "America" is a synonym for the USA and you might as well get used to it.

[Lorileah]

let's keep country out of this....Transgender only

[mechamoose]

let's keep country out of this....Transgender only

There is still a test to be had here... heels vs flats!

wedges are cheating (Even though I love them) They are the bisexuals of footwear.

- MM

[Samantha2015]

Madame Moose I love that you hijacked ?? the thread into what is really the important
discussion SHOES !!!!

Let other people label us whatever they want as long as its civil. You are what you feel you are.
I think I'm just a plain old CD. If somebody else wants to call me TG ..fine no problem for me.
When the labeling becomes nasty or derogatory is when corrections or actions become necessary !!

[mechamoose]

We have a couple of flavors here. Those who like pretty clothes (like me) and those who were born in the wrong skin. Dress how you want, but that has nothing to do with our members who are living in the wrong body.

CD/TG isn't all that random a label. Gender identification is a pretty hot issue right now.

I love that we have so many strong women here. This is in the top 2 of my safest places.

- MM

[Tiffany Jane]

Nobody gets to challenge who I say I am.

Period. Full stop.

I'm 'complicated'. I don't need to justify myself.

<3

- MM

Been awhile since I have visited the forum, yet I find this to be the thesis of my departure. My wife tells me this everyday, yet it is hard to teach an old man new sensibilities when he has hidden the tricks for so long. Also, happened to click on your profile, MM, not what I expected to find, yet that is so common when you allow ones preconceived expectations to be opened to the truth.

[Belle Cri]

mechamoose

Amen. I'll stick with my pretties and damn the torpedoes.


Oh you evil bitch. No. Wedges are divine.

[HerWife1110]

Bloody Hell!
This thread has been a great eye opener for me. I was relatively unfamiliar with CD prior to my wife coming out as trans.
CD has an incredibly vast scope. I feel silly that I was so naive. I now have many trans friends, but have only met 2 CDs (very briefly) in the community.
Thanks everyone. This has been both enlightening and entertaining.
BTW. Wedges! ( I'm bi )

[Pat]

mechamoose

But are they the footwear of bisexuals? (I could go either way...)

[NicoleScott]

We already knew Crossdress vs Transgender is a wedge issue, but this is ridiculous.

[Meghan4now]

I think wedges look clunky, but are much easier to walk in. What does that tell you?

Are you in it for what feels right, or are you willing to suffer for how you want to be percieved?

I have heels and flats. Funny though, wouldn't need wedges for my boots. Somehow they look totally hot, and I can navigate the world in them pretty well. So am I now just a situational CD/TG? While you are figuring that out, I'll be over here trying to perfect my beard cover. Let me know when your done, and we'll go get a drink.

[Belle Cri]

I'm done, let's go.

lol.

[KayMcLaughlin]

I've never tried wedges. Maybe that should be my next experiment?

I'm fluid, at this point. Sometimes I am Kay. Sometimes I am not. When out as a male, sometimes I wear a kilt. Half my jeans are women's sizes (I love the fit), and ALL my shoes are size 11 women's, even the androgynous ones I wear as a male. They fit better, and I enjoy the light weight in my feet. I dunno where I will be a year or two from now. It's about the journey, not the destination.

[Sarah Doepner]

It seems I'm weighing in a little late on this but the water seems fine and I'll jump in anyway.

I admit I've wavered back and forth for several years on terms and may do so in the future, but here's my take on the basic stuff. I see Transgender as the umbrella term for everyone who is not locked in to the gender binary. From those who are resistant to being included because they only wore panties for a fetish experience to those born in the wrong body and fully transistion. yeah, very big umbrella. After that you can pick the terms that define the behavior/mind set under that umbrella that best fit your self-image. You may be a Dabbler, Crossdresser, Gender Queer, Gender Fluid, Trans* or anything else that has been tossed in the ring or you invent. Some of these will find you with lots of folks smiling and nodding their heads and others will have people shrugging their shoulders in confusion.

I'm starting to think the key is how we use those terms as they apply to ourselves. Since we have to filter the language though our own sensibilities and experiences and expectations, it's not a surprise that we have difficulty finding stable common ground. As we change, our personal definitions are modified as well. I'm beginning to believe that we, (no, make that I) use some terms and definitions as limiters or barriers. As long as I call myself a "Crossdresser", I don't need to consider anything else. It may be that's exactly the best word to define me, but as soon as I begin to think I'm "Gender Fluid" then MY view of the world and definitions change. And if I just say I'm "Transgender" it opens the rest of the umbrella for consideration.

There are enough of us with similiar experiences that we tend to agree on the meaning of many of the terms. The key point is how we use that language for ourselves and how it either frees or limits us in our personal growth.