it's a good question Gendermutt and something I've given a lot of thought to.
The funny thing about a gender transition is how absurdly simple it is to conceive of once you accepted who you are. Who am I? Well since you asked;
I am someone who has identified as something else for as long as I can remember. I thought that something else was gay until I tried being openly gay, and realized I might be wrong. When I finally found out what my real issue was, I was terrified and resolute that I was NOT going to transition. All it took was a near death experience for me to open my eyes to the life I had, instead of the life I wanted. I didn't want to be this way. What way is that? Well I'm glad you asked;
I am someone who wants to act exactly the way I feel without people thinking that I'm supposed to act some other way. As it turns out, I've always liked feminine things and expressed myself in a feminine manner. No I'm not an overly femmy person, and I don't care for overtly femmy things, but for the most part everything about me was decidedly not masculine. I love women emotionally but being friends with a woman was not possible due to normal sexual chemistry and my testosterone fueled love muscle. My affection for women was forever being misconstrued by them AND me. I loved doing things with the guys sometimes but I resented being ONE of the guys. Anyhoo, coming out as trans allowed me to just be myself and no longer have to police my mannerisms, or my interests, or my language. I tried the gender queer thing but I found that I really didn't like being perceived as a man. My transition was kind of the last thing I tried and sure enough, the personality issues that plagued me my whole life were mostly resolved by the freedom to express myself openly, everywhere, every day.
What if I would have been allowed or encouraged to just be myself as a kid? I guess we'll never know.