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Thread: earrrings outed me

  1. #1
    Junior Member
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    earrrings outed me

    I got up in such a hurry as I was running late this morning and came into the office with 2 pearl studs in each ear. A female co worker pointed out that they did not suit my oufit and said she will talk to me later oooops

  2. #2
    Senior Member Princess29's Avatar
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    good luck Sophie. I hope it works out for you. Its hard to know how its going to go but try not to worry about it till you have to

  3. #3
    Gail gailbridges's Avatar
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    You work on Sunday?
    it's dumb to be racist.
    Can't we just all agree to hate stupid people instead? There are stupid people in all races, creeds, and faiths. It's a veritable rainbow of stupid out there, AND they don't know they are stupid. What could be more fair?

  4. #4
    Martini Girl Katey888's Avatar
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    Sophie - perhaps you'll get some nice tips on what might be better... pearl drops...? Or little diamante butterlies...?

    How did you not notice...? Oh well - a secret shared will be all around the office by lunch time... You must let us know the outing outcome...

    Gail - you had me checking my PC, watch, phone, calendar, TV... I'm still pretty sure it's Monday today as my hangover is always slightly smaller than Sunday's...

    Katey x
    "Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
    Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear"
    Stefani Germanotta

  5. #5
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi Sophie,

    All you can do is ride the wave and see what she has to say. Hopefully she can keep a secret.

    Cheers

    Isha

  6. #6
    0 to trans in 60 seconds! Donnagirl's Avatar
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    Your story got me a little worried, so I took out my diamond studs.... and replaced them with some pink Swarovski crystal hearts. Hope they bloody well notice!!!
    Call me Donna, please

  7. #7
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    Maybe she'll have some good fashion advice for you?
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  8. #8
    Senior Member stefan37's Avatar
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    Just own it. Your only explanation should be you like it. After a day or so. It will be a non issue. You could go to work tomorrow with eye liner, nail polish and earrings. Be yourself. Answer questions that you like it. It will be a non issue after a week.
    Now if you want to pair that with woman's clothing and shoes. That opens up a whole new can of worms.
    "When failure is off the table the only thing left is to negotiate levels of success" M Hobbes

    "Never Let your Fear Decide Your Fate" Awolnation

    "A new dawn destroys the tranquility of the darkness" Steph W

  9. #9
    Platinum Member
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    Hi Sophie, My ears are triple pierced sense May and when someone says anything
    about them I just say "Is this going to be a problem for you ?? ".

    Never let someone else take control of the situation, stay in control.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  10. #10
    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
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    I wore pearl earrings in guy mode. Nobody ever mentioned it, and I certainly wouldn't care if they had. I wouldn't worry too much.

  11. #11
    happy to be her Sarah Doepner's Avatar
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    Earrings can be the start of many conversations, but very few of mine have resulted in me admitting I'm other than straight. I've had my ears pierced for about 4 years now, but this summer I went to a family reunion that only happens ever 5 years. It should be no surprise that my small black hoops were noticed and commented on by many of my uncles and cousins. One of my cousins who has a gay brother, asked a question. He said "I can't remember the code, left ear or right ear is gay, but what does both ears mean?" I told him Trans and left it at that, his eyes a little unfocused and no more discussion on the issue. I'm not sure how he processed that bit of information as we had to start loading plates with potato salad and bratwurst. Maybe when I visit them in the spring I'll be able to follow up, but we are both in the dark now.

    I hope your follow up conversation is a good one.
    Sarah
    Being transgender isn't a lifestyle choice. How you deal with it is.

  12. #12
    Junior Member Alleybee's Avatar
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    Hi Sophie, I am currently working in one of the most conservative regions around, and have both ears pierced. I have yet to hear one single comment when at a shopping mall etc. I would not be able to even consider wearing them to the office, I remove them just before leaving home, and put them back in as soon as I return from work. I hear your story!

  13. #13
    Banned Spammer
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    And how did this "out" you?

  14. #14
    Reality Check
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    Having pierced ears or being seen wearing earrings won't "out" you as a crossdresser unless you let it. Of course if they are dangling earrings or large hoops, they might.

    I find it difficult to sleep in anything but the small studs and of course with larger earrings, there's a danger of catching them on something while sleeping and tearing the ears.

  15. #15
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    I tend to think maybe you you want to be "outed" thats why you wore them.
    Not bashing you just being realistic because I have done the same thing.

  16. #16
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    Earrings won't out you. I wear earrings constantly in male mode.

    Of course if they're the long dangly kind ...

  17. #17
    Aspiring Member OCCarly's Avatar
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    Maybe you could tell her that on weekends you're a pirate. Or that that punk rock concert on Saturday night was a wild one.

    Seriously, better in this day and age just to own it. Maybe she will come up with some interesting fashion advice.

  18. #18
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Hi Sophie,

    Pearls might be a bit much, but there are lots of other nice earrings that men do wear. See the link to Amazon.com men's earrings below. Some might be too masculine looking for your needs, but they also have beautiful silver, gold, and diamond studs and hoops:

    http://www.amazon.com/Mens-Earrings/...8&node=3888141
    Reine

  19. #19
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OCCarly View Post
    Maybe you could tell her [...] that that punk rock concert on Saturday night was a wild one.
    But pearls? More believable if you say it was a punk chamber orchestra.

  20. #20
    Aspiring Member ChristinaK's Avatar
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    There was a biker dude at work that had pearls. Don't remember if it was both ears or not. My previous boss, at 55 years old, wore huge diamonds in both ears. He's a biker too.

    Maybe people will just assume you have an alter lifestyle after work. Maybe they'll think you're a CDer. Either way, I doubt seriously if anybody will talk about it in today's workplace. And, if they do, they won't say anything to you. It'll pass in a minute and all will be okay.

    When I wore light pink nail polish for a week at work, nobody noticed, or they just didn't say anything. I showed a female co-worker and she said I'd better not let anybody notice as they were a very rough bunch. Working in a control room, my hands were always visible. Either they were blind or they had enough respect to not say anything.

    It will be just fine, unless you forget to take that dress off the next time!

  21. #21
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    I agree that do not admit anything and reply that you like them. When she talks to you about them, ask her in a nice way what would she recommend that you wear, silver or gold studs, small diamonds, what?? I am not sure where you live and what type of work and position that you have, but unless there is a specific dress code, they are only comments and not condemnation. If she continues to ask why, you could reply that you have a life outside of work and enjoy that life. Find that conservative dressing rocker who has pearl earrings and share that with her. Earrings do not automatically say or even indicate that you crossdress. Short honest answers tend to stop further questions. Good luck.

  22. #22
    Lisa Allisa's Avatar
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    I wear silver studs or black pearl studs on the job site, never an issue, can't wear any type of hoop because of safety, there are other guys who have large holes in their ears so small studs are just small studs. With all the tats and other piercings on the job earrings are mild. Your only outed if you want to be.
    "you are a strange species and there are many out there;shall I tell you what I find beautiful about you ,you are at your best when things are at their worst" ...[ Starman]
    It may of course be a bit disturbing to sense that one is really not so firmly anchored to the gender one was born into.

  23. #23
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    Your only outed if you want to be.[/QUOTE]

    Yep I agree.
    I actually had hot pink medium hoops on last Sat with guys I worked with for over 30 years and they never screamed out "OMG you are a crossderesser!!!!

    Its none of her business for one so just say you like them and give no other reason. Don't make up a lie to cover it up because she will know you are lying to her.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 08-03-2015 at 05:34 PM.

  24. #24
    Silver Member justmetoo's Avatar
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    Maybe you have found a new friend? I would just be try to be honest, but play it by ear (heh) depending on what she says. You're the only one here who knows exactly what the circumstances are where you work. I hope it turns out well!

  25. #25
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    Wow, so how did the 'she will talk to me later' part go, you KNOW you have to share with the group now ☺

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