Just one, let me hurt just one...

[PaulaQ]

'reconsider this lifestyle choice' and think about the impact it's having on others I'm not going to be responsible for my actions...

I'd ask "What impact is that? This affects no one besides me. Sure, some people get upset about it - but I don't actually harm them, or any property. It doesn't make any statement about other people at all. Therefore, there is no impact on others. I'm not responsible for anyone else's feelings regarding my clothing choices. People can get upset about all manner of arbitrary and random things that are problems only inside of their minds. I'm not responsible for that stuff either."

[Millie.Graham]

When confronted with people who suggest such ideas I will every once in a great while hop on over to youtube and watch the MinusIQ video. Then remind myself that while the grass may seem greener on the other side, I would rather not take the pill, I kind of like being me.

[Shelly Preston]

You should have said that's its great idea to take up golf.

I will have the advantage of using the ladies tees

[Marcelle]

Hi Donna,

I like Jen's approach for this one . . . put the D-Bag on the spot and have them explain exactly what they mean, whom it will impact and how? I find those comments just come from a position of ignorance with little thought and when I force the person to explain what they mean, they fumble for words or provide idiotic comments all of which I can easily dismantle and leave them feeling a little less sure of themselves.

Cheers

Isha

[Claire Cook]

I tried golf , as many say a great walk spoiled by trying to hit a ball in the right direction, last time I played not only my ball landed in the lake at the eighteenth but my clubs nearly joined it ! Putting on a dress and makeup is far more rewarding and relaxing !

Hi Teresa,

... not to mention less frustrating! Maybe the solution is what several others have suggested --- play in a cute top and skirt off the ladies' tees. At least we'd have more fun that way!

[CarlaWestin]

'Why don't I take up golf instead?' - how do you answer that?

How 'bout, "Because I don't have issues with balls like you do!"

[Kate T]

You can take 2 approaches Donna

As has been suggested you can react with a snarky or aggressive comment. Sometimes it may even be justified. BUT just remember that as soon as you do this ANYTHING else you say will fall on deaf ears and you will leave a negative impression.

The alternative is to regard it as a teachable moment. Your chance to help people better understand that TG isn't just a hobby or a game, it is an integral part of who you feel you are. Yes it is going to get tedious and you are welcome to vent as much as you like here but just remember, most people are not mind readers, they have no idea how you feel unless you tell them. Nicely.

[Krisi]

Is your lifestyle having an impact on others? Are these "others" people you love or care about? Is this person sincere in his/her question or just messing with you?

If this is just some person you met in a bar, do what you want, but consider the possible consequences. If it's someone close to you, sit them down and try to explain why it is you do what you do.

[pamela7]

"okay, yes, I'll reconsider, I think I should more strongly come out and challenge narrowminded bigots, i'm not having enough impact yet".
"if i punched you, would that be enough impact?"

[Amy Fakley]

If another well meaning but misguided fool asks me to 'reconsider this lifestyle choice' and think about the impact it's having on others I'm not going to be responsible for my actions...

'Why don't I take up golf instead?' - how do you answer that?

"I am responsible for my actions, and golf clothes are hideous. Also it's about as much a lifestyle choice as being born left handed"

Now ... dont take this the wrong way, but girl ... you HAVE gone from 0 to tranny 60 in under a minute. Depending on who it was that said it, it may have been sincere concern as voiced through a filter of ignorance. Not the intentional kind, but more of the "I've never known someone trans" ignorance.

Kind hearted education may be the better response than the bitch-slap, though if it was just some random dude in a bar .... yeah ... bitch-slappin' time!

[Charona]

I have often been accused of answering questions with other questions. In this case, I'd probably have asked him why he cared.

[ShriekCassandra]

Ask him to reconsider how much impact his crappy snore inducing 'sport' has had on every kid that's ever been forced to partake in it at those dreary inland holiday camps their parents always sent them off to in the summer.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

'Why don't I take up golf instead?' - how do you answer that?

"Balls."

[CONSUELO]

I spent some time in Australia several decades ago and was struck by the prevalence of a "laddish" culture. I have often thought that being anything out of the mainstream in OZ must be challenging. I hope it has improved.

As for a reply to the comment; it reveals such an ignorance of what cross dressing is that it is hard to find an answer.

How about- I did take up golf and look what happened!

[Kate Simmons]

I'd probably say: "Okay Hon, I'll consider it but I'll have to find a cute little golfing outfit first. ."

[NicoleScott]

"I do play golf - I just like to hit from the ladies' tees "

[claire1d]

You could tell him that you did in fact take up golf, but after loosing your balls so many time that is what (CD) happened to you. And then ask him how good a player he is (in term of loosing his balls) :-) ....welcome to the club...soon.

Or talk about impact that golf has on others like " use of toxic assortment of synthetic fertilizers, herbicides, insecticides, fungicides, and other chemicals. These practices have been linked to numerous diseases in humans including cancer, as well as damage to local wildlife. "

By the way, I love golf. I wish I could look good playing it.

[Alexa Lynne]

I'm with ya, Donna! Sick and tired of family members telling me that God don't make mistakes, and that if i was intended to be a girl, I would have been born one. . . yada, yada, yada. I lost my job a month ago, and on the verge of losing my vehicle too. My mom is thrilled to death. She said "that's a good thing, because at least you won't be able to afford your hormones or go to the doctor".

[Loni]

tell him to take up cross dressing, he just might love it.

[Stephanie47]

Out of curiosity, what did the person mean by "think about the impact it's having on others?" I guess you can try to educate the person, but, some people just want to wallow in ignorance. I really would not give anyone a flippant answer. But, if I was forced to think up some cute one liner, I guess I'd tell the person if he or she was willing to carry your golf back the next time you played.

[JohnH]

How about telling him/her to shove up his/her... the entire golf camp?

I agree - tell him/her to shove all the golf clubs up where the sun don't shine!

John

[Rhian]

Tell them you don't find the idea of strolling round a secluded field full of men appealing.

[JessicaJHall]

A lot of us do play golf (wink to Isabella ), offer to help find him a tg golf buddy. Or you could ask how many people have been hurt by his tendency to be a judgmental curmudgeon.

[Judith96a]

To which the answer is.... I do play golf - badly! Why can't i do both?

[Tina955]

If it is just some jerk in a bar or anywhere else in public for that matter, ask him who he thinks is going to feel more embarrassed, the guy in women's clothing or the guy who gets his a%# kicked by a guy in women's clothing.

Tina