"Who is that Woman?"

[windycissy]

So I got a little careless this morning, looking at these pictures of myself en femme on my computer, when my SO surprised me and saw them! “Who is that woman?” she demanded as I hurriedly closed them. I fumbled something about pictures of Miss America – the first thing that came into my mind – but she wasn’t buying it, and went on and on about how disappointed she was and how would I feel if I discovered her looking at pictures of men on the web? The storm is over now, and I guess I’m just glad that she thought the pictures of me as a woman were really women!

[Alice Torn]

Close call indeed! I would think more than a second or two and she would have clocked you!

[Lauri K]

Windy tale you told your wife (miss america photos), I think I would have had to say you may want to "look a little closer dear"

But if you are in situation where she does not know anything about windy cissy maybe you done the right thing.

I think you better be getting your story ready in case she inquires further, maybe not but I suspect she is on to something.

[heatherdress]

Can you tell her, Cissy? She saw your picture. Maybe not clearly, but she had concerns about it. She was upset you were looking at other women. Won't she continue to be concerned about that? Or maybe she will discover other pictures and be more upset because you did not tell her? You know your wife best. Good luck.

[Rogina B]

All this time I thought you were an "out" girl...

[Adelaide]

Does she know or she didn't recognize you?
My S.O. doesn't support me at all....so I could relate to your difficult situation...

[Jazzy Jaz]

I would be worried about her starting to suspect an affair potentially.

[Hell on Heels]

Hell-o Windy,
OMG! Does that story have a familiar ring to it!
My SO had caught a glimpse of a pic of me on my phone,
she wasn't going to just walk away from me after seeing it though.
My reaction to her persistent "who was that girl?" questioning made it so
obvious that I was hiding something, that I had to give in, and come
out to her.
I couldn't have her thinking I was seeing some other girl.
It was the hardest conversation I have ever had.
But the relief that came from being honest with her made it worth it!
Be careful with those pics.
Much Love,
Kristyn

[Meghan4now]

Windy, dear, it's time.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Windy, I too always thought that you were OUT, Please clear this up for us.
I think that I should clear some of the pictures from my cell phone.

[Candice June Lee]

Think to my self, it may be time to tell your wife. It's better to be honest than to remember all the lies and when you told them. I am just glad my wife knows and does support me. I don't think I could deal with hiding it anymore. It was getting to unbearable.
Shocked that your wife hasn't suspected an affair.

[jenniferinsf]

wow what an awkward situation...after reading responses i would tend to agree with both kandia and heather dress. i know it is and would be difficult but when presented with an opportunity to begin a dialogue.....

[Stephanie47]

There's a good reason for not posting pictures on any electronic device, whether you're out to a wife or not. You may have bought yourself a little more time with your reason. You don't look like a Miss America. If she did not recognize you because of the angle, but, thought the pictures were of a mature woman, then you would have been better off looking at Miss America pictures. Any wife knows her man does not have access to young Miss America types, but, could very well be conversing with a woman more her husband's age. I'm sure your wife has filed this minor transgression in her memory banks. You know your wife, so I'm not going to recommend having "The Talk" now. But, get your story straight.

[windycissy]

Wow girls, thanks for all your good thoughts. First things first: things are back to normal, so I think I dodged a major bullet. So stupid of me! And I have to admit, for a brief moment I did think about fessing up to her, but as someone said, I know her best, better than anyone in the world, and I can just tell you that she would not react positively. It's too bad, but that's her...and to tell you the truth, I kind of thrive on the secret - I know that's hard to understand for most people, I guess I should have been a double agent!

Now, as for whether I'm "out" - I've been very lucky in life: several years ago I sold my business, and the company who bought it asked me to stay on as a consultant. I agreed on the condition that they provide me with an office/apartment nearby, which happens to be several hours away from home. So once or twice a month I get to live 24/7 as a woman, which is heaven for me. All my Cissy stuff is stashed away in a storage room. Like I said, I should have been a double agent!

I really do like having and keeping secrets....

[ReineD]

Gosh, I didn't even know you were married! I thought you were single and had a boyfriend.

Anyway, glad you dodged the bullet. I won't preach on whether or not to tell your wife (or what you do when you are away) if you prefer the secretive aspect of it all, as long as you are both satisfied with the status quo. Will you retain your apartment in the foreseeable future?

[windycissy]

I hope so! It's like living a dream...as for my boyfriend, yes it's true - he's married too, and we kid ourselves that we're really not cheating, it's just a night out with the guys, only instead of beer and football, one of us is into lipstick and nylons. I know, I'm a bad girl....

[Robin414]

Kinda reminds me of a humor thread I read "when did you start cross dressing, when my wife found a bra and panties in my car! 😡"

[Momarie]

You are not being kind or fair to your wife.
You want your cake and to eat it too.
But all is well, YOUR needs are being met and that's all that matters, to hell with your wife and her feelings.
What a selfish, dishonest "husband" .

[reb.femme]

Hi Windy,

I had sympathy with your situation when first reading your post but to be honest, reading your last couple of replies made me feel this was / is a bragging post. I understand hiding the cross dressing but the boyfriend on the side is another point entirely. I totally understand Momarie's standpoint.

Rebecca

[Buttercup's Princess]

I once dated a guy, this is maybe six years ago now, who came out about his cross dressing to me one night. When I asked him how come I had crabs, he admitted that he had slept with four men while we were together. It took me years to pick myself up from that; I ran myself into a ditch. He caused me immense confusion and loss of self worth and esteem, and we were not ever in a serious relationship like marriage. Please do not be that person. Your wife is suppose to trust you, and what you are doing in not a joke and there is nothing acceptable about it. What a poor lady, you have made me very sad. What kind of role model are you being for cross dressers out there? This is one of the first threads I have read, so now I am thinking, is this what all cross dressers do? Can I trust my boyfriend? I can obviously tell from the responses that the cross dressers on here do not all cheat on their wives and sneak around with other cross dressers, as they are not supporting your lifestyle. I do very much believe that I can trust my boyfriend, and if he ever does or is doing that to me, which I have specially explained to him is crossing my boundaries, than I am a fool. Reading this certainly brings back some emotions that I put behind me long ago. Not at all the support I was looking for today. Your wife to tell her the truth, hell, maybe she'll want to join in the fun, or in the least, give her the chance to set her boundries. And if not, I don't blame her and you gotta ask yourself if you are really with her for the love. Because what you are doing is NOT love, that I am sure of.

[Melanie 0339]

Well said buttercup xxx

[Sarah L]

I hope so! It's like living a dream...as for my boyfriend, yes it's true - he's married too, and we kid ourselves that we're really not cheating, it's just a night out with the guys, only instead of beer and football, one of us is into lipstick and nylons. I know, I'm a bad girl....

This is a horrible thing you are doing to your wife.
Not just your wife, but his wife, too, as you know he is married.

Does he know you are a crossdresser? If he is cheating on his wife (physically or in spirit), he deserves what he gets.

Your behavior is something a wife is likely to fear when her husband comes out as a CD and you are making this a reality for your wife. She will find out.

This kind of attitude hurts all CDs who hope to find someone special and accepting. This is going to come back to haunt you.

I don't know if I will get a warning for my comments, but it doesn't matter.

You should be ashamed of yourself!

[2B Natasha]

Hi Windy,

I had sympathy with your situation when first reading your post but to be honest, reading your last couple of replies made me feel this was / is a bragging post. I understand hiding the cross dressing but the boyfriend on the side is another point entirely. I totally understand Momarie's standpoint.

Rebecca

I am so with them both on this. And yet people wonder why we are looked at as a bunch of losing sneaky losers.

[DanielleLee]

When I first saw your post on Monday... I thought to myself that I hope he can find the courage to come clean to his wife and even had some empathy towards you being closeted...

Since reading the later responses to this thread... I know that won't happen. You simply are without courage. I cannot even begin to understand how you can make light of the fact you are a cheating and lying husband: "as for my boyfriend, yes it's true - he's married too, and we kid ourselves that we're really not cheating, it's just a night out with the guys, only instead of beer and football, one of us is into lipstick and nylons. I know, I'm a bad girl...." You aren't a bad girl, you're just a jerk

Mods, I do apologize if that was out of line/disallowed by forum rules. It was about as clean as I could keep it. I'll understand if that comment has to be edited or removed.

To Buttercup's Princess.... We as a collective are pretty decent people. WC is not the rule, but rather the exception. I do hope that you and your SO are able to accept this part of him together as a couple; and wish you both the best.

[Lily Catherine]

You knew with a guilty mind you were having an affair, ergo you and your boyfriend were kidding yourselves into believing otherwise. The time has come to face it.