Sometimes there's just too much going on... I've been extremely busy with life... it happens!
Sometimes there's just too much going on... I've been extremely busy with life... it happens!
Does anyone remember Frederique? We used to exchange messages a couple years back.
Yes to Frederique...she hasn't been here in a long time either.
When the answers escape us when we start to fade
Remember who loved you and the ones who have stayed
Cause my body will fail, but my soul will go on
So don't you get lonely I'm right where you are
I came on here and inquired about her some months ago and the mods axed the thread. I guess it's ok to mention her in a thread with another title...apparently.Originally Posted by danam
All kind of situations may cause some of us to fall away from the site. I believe some fall away from CD or the community altogether. Look at all Gina Lance did for the community then all of a sudden "poof", just gone.
I believe some reach a ceiling where there is no where else to go with it. Hell who knows it could happen to some of us. That fateful day may creep upon you where you "hang up your heels" so to speak.
For some the CDing is an ends to a means, an action reaction thing. It may simply play out at some point. Others feel truly transgendered.
Some days I feel like one of these days I am going to leave it behind. The next day I feel like I can't live without it.
It seams that the majority of the under thirty members have disappeared.
The new wears off . . . the honeymoon ends . . . new material or fresh topics become fewer and farther apart. After a while CD-ing just is. One gets comfortable (hopefully) with who they are and coming here becomes less a necessity.
I am more interested in why people chose to stay.
I ask myself that question too. I used to post a lot of pictures of myself but that got old very quickly.
I stay because of my passion in this topic and also because of personal connections.
I can only assume that those who left are not as passionate and somehow failed to find any personal connection.
The forum gets old, yes. So does a 20 year old marriage. I mean... if a person leaves the forum because he/she is bored, it says something about their interest/passion in the topic.
I'm here to stay for a little while longer.
Love,
S
"The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me" - Ayn Rand
This place was a good start for me when I was in the closet, but I only made one real friend here who has subsequently disappeared. She helped me get out, I'll always miss her. I come alive around people. This forum is no longer enough for me. Face Book works better for me to keep in touch with those I don't get to see every week or so. Karren is there holding forth as an internet Queen, as are just about all of my close friends whom I see often and care for dearly. Maybe I've finally grown up a bit, graduated, and I'm off to college or whatever!
"I just stopped in to see what condition my condition was in"
Lynn Marie
Click here to see me on Flickr
i miss jorja. i liked her humor , and her input. she spoke with a knowledge that can only come form a n extended walk. and i see that she is banned! WHY?
I haven't been on here in a while, its a combination of work and life getting in the way. I don't post very much because I'm a pretty private person. I do like to scan the threads the and yes there is a lot of repetition and that does get old. Just my thoughts on it
Because it turned out she wasn't who she said she was.
Reine
This pretty much nailed it for me, though I do very occasionally drop by to say hello.
So "Hello!" Hope you all have been well.
150901 Roof 09 (Mobile).JPG
Erica
For photos on flickr, my user name is cd_erica_f
Hello Erica. Glad that you dropped in. You look great!
It's important to understand that many of us aren't who we say we are. This is a problem with the anonymity of the Internet. It's all too easy to pretend we are something we are not. Some people get their "jollies" from joining Internet forums and pretending to be someone that they are not.
This forum is all about pretending to be something we are not. We are not women, we are men who like to pretend we are women.
Last edited by Krisi; 10-06-2015 at 07:13 AM.
I would say the repetition causes some to leave, I came back to the forums last February or so after years of being away due to my own acceptance issues and since then even the threads start duplicating.
I can't recall many of the members from back when I joined, especially even the "youth" section when I was in it, I guess they moved to other social sites. I have my own Facebook but I discovered very quickly that adding one CDer leads to all the suggested pages,friends and groups to "sexy trans groups" "sissy MtFer's" etc etc. my mom and my close friends are friends of my second FB page and I don't need them to see that, especially when some of the suggested friends that pop up are hairy men in a pair of panties with an erection, I don't want to see that, I definitely don't need my mom seeing that or thinking that about me.
I do remember Jessica who, she was a great pillar of the community, sad to see she's gone. I didn't realise jorja had been blocked for whatever nefarious reasons, while we are all someone we're not it's odd to hear that it could be worse
♫I cant stand to fly, I'm not that naive. I'm just out to find the better part of me. I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane, I'm more than some pretty face beside a train. Its not easy to be me.♫
I used to post threads a lot more but after enough nasty posts that bordered on personal, I cut way back. Now I just do photo threads and an occasional Writers section thread about my blog.
This forum is a godsend, very well run, a lifeline. I am very thankful for it.
I think that this forum is a great primer and tutorial: once you got the needed info, one tends to move on for the most part
a) First you find comfort that you are not alone in your feelings and actions
b) You learn the hardware - bras, dresses, corsets, hip pads, wigs, how to find jewelry and shoes in our sizes, how to shop online and in the stores
c) You learn the software - makeup, presentation, voice, mannerisms
d) You graduate, if you wish to, from dressing inside and venturing out
e) You get advanced knowledge on how you handle this with your SO - disclosure, DADT, stay in closet. There are sub factions in this forum that you can talk to representing these categories
f) You connect with 5-10 people who become your close friends and confidants ( this by far is has been the most valuable to me)
g) Sometimes this advances to
1. Your SO decides that this is not what she signs up for and decides to leave. Again, there are many here you can offer you advice, and can tell you that you will come out the other side
2. This is not enough for you and you decide to transition - I can't imagine how much harder than it was without the internet without feeling so isolated and alone.
To me this forum is a blessing - as it relates to the mods, I would definitely sacrifice a little freedom in exchange for a safe haven and a place to articulate my feelings without the constant barrage of crotch shots.
Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
Because it turned out she wasn't who she said she was.
I thought exactly the same thing when I saw Reine's statement. I mean except for the trans ladies who have transitioned or are transitioning, who of us really is who we say we are here. I mean I can guaran-damn-tee you my name is not really Sayyidah and I don't wear a hijab when I'm not logged in.
I don't know who Jorja is or any of the other girls that are being mentioned but it sounds like they are remembered with a LOT of fondness.
I guess I'm just trying to say that I hope in two or three years there isn't a thread here saying "i wonder what happened to Sayyidah 'Sue' and there is a reply stating quite matter of factly "she wasn't who she said she was."
I am not a woman nor am I a man... I am an enby. Hi, I am Wren.
I come and go with my availability. Sometimes life just gets in the way.
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