To some of the comments, any gg who comes here looking to figure this out and how to cope, deal etc etc, no. CDing itself won't be the only cause for a breakup. Unless the cding becomes all that the life of the gg is. That they completely lost their husband to cdinf, which although not an absolute, generally because they are ts, and live their life as and identify as a woman only.
But yes, there are women who will say flat out no to any of it. Either because they truly cannot deal with it, or they choose not to.
I am going to take somewhat of the middle ground when it comes to be patient or make the demand for total truth right away. As I had said prior, he himself simply may not be ready to accept his own truth. That was certainly me for nearly 3 decades. Yes, he may be lying to you. But lying to himself as well. It happens, and for a great big majority on here, it happened with them and I as well.
The dating site... yeah, imo, that one is o.b. what he was doing I am thinking was not truly looking for hook ups, not real ones in person, but playing out fantasy online. It is o.b. for a committed relationship, pure and simple.
I really do not think that there are any cders here who are crow barring this relationship due to Tammies acceptance of cding. I haven't seen her saying she prefers it. Hopes her partner comes out so they can be girls together. I believe she came on here looking for help so that she can have a relationship with honesty and trust.