The Rush is on to have a transgender child.

[Kelly DeWinter]

The rush seems to be on to be the first on the block to be parents of a transgender child. Is this the result of media exposure of "Being Transgender" ? or is this just more openness to healthy exposure in the media.

Just looking for some thoughts.

Added

I've just noticed a lot of articles lately of parents who or media who are labeling, seeking treatment for their kids is rising.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/heal...referrals.html
http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/health/sex-change-treatment-children-rise-article-1.1025598
http://radaronline.com/celebrity-new...ender-idenity/
http://www.wikihow.com/Determine-if-...is-Transgender

[Alberta_Pat]

To me, kids are kids. People who wish to have "trans" kids are just as bad as those who deny "trans" kids.

[Kimberley May]

Why would there be any rush to have a TG child? Is it considered as a trendy thing to be the first with a TG child? I'm not trying to sound ignorant and offensive so apologies in advance. It's just something I feel is pretty extreme and maybe a little too rushed, having lived a childhood undergoing many intrusive painful surgeries myself, for totally unrelated reasons.

I feel this kind of adult pressure to be TG (if this kind of pressure is what you mean, as I'm not totally clear on the topic) is the last thing to put on any child. I'm still unconvinced adult intervention to encourage early treatment on young children. I think it risks bringing in more confusion onto the child not allowing him/her to go at their own natural pace only. Let kids remain kids at least until they reach puberty which is when things really start to kick-off.

They discover these things by themselves anyway without adult influence. I'm alarmed at the younger preteen ages more and more are starting some kind of medical treatment (which is what I read somewhere), and intrusive irreversible surgery is definitely still something not to be rushed into when they reach their teenage years. I feel that it's definitely a decision best taken at a more mature adult level, and when the body has fully grown and developed. But through the childhood and teen years there should at least be counselling to help them fully understand who they are and what they want.

[ReineD]

Kelly, I don't understand. Why do you think that parents want their children to be TG?

I do think that parents who have TG kids are wanting them to be themselves rather than suppress or cure it. I think the parents are beginning to realize that it cannot be suppressed or cured, and they love their kids enough to overcome their own initial fears and ease their children's transition. Since we do still live in a world that accepts this with uncertainty other than tolerance of media personalities who do transition (and in many pockets of our society it is still not accepted or tolerated even when it is arm's length), I think that many parents try to educate the public and thus promote understanding by starting advocacy groups or talking to the media in the hopes their efforts will create a more welcoming society for their children.

[Barbara Ella]

Sorry, but I am not seeing evidence of this. i do think that parents are being more open and honest about their children than their parents were so we are seeing more transgender children coming out, and of course the press will continue to eat this up. The press does not give a fig about anything but making headlines,and unfortunately, the majority of society is still neanderthalistic in their understanding.

[heatherdress]

I don't understand this thread. There are so many challenges parents of transgender children face. Why would there be a rush? I do admire, however, all parents who do support their children with carte and properly made decision-making..

[AnnieMac]

Well, it would be typical, as a result of the ebb and flow of our now immediate popular culture, especially in the often narrow vision of those of us in the good old US of A. A while back it became hip to black, then hip to be Japanese, then Australian, then lesbian, then gay, then nerdy, etc, so I suppose being transgender is the next cool thing, which I don't think has totally hit at full tilt yet. I do long for the day though when just simple cross dressing is THE thing to do, and goes mainstream (dreaming perhaps). Like I think a mentioned in another thread, transgender currently is higher on the general acceptability chart than cross dressing.
I think that still may be that most people view simple cross dressing as a Fetish, and being trasngender is something more deep seated, and real. And, sometimes I dunno maybe they are right. -Annie's crazy take.

[pamela7]

there's a notion, true or not, who knows, of parents getting an advantage for their children through "disability labelling" at school, like it or not, these things have "fashions"; dyslexic, ADHD, autistic, asperger, dyspraxic, dyscalculic, LGBT, ethnic or religious minority, perhaps seeking a different kind of special. I get the drift of the OP, if perhaps wondering whether such a things is really possible or practical. How to know?

[HerAngel]

To me, kids are kids. People who wish to have "trans" kids are just as bad as those who deny "trans" kids.

I agree 100%

[Kelly DeWinter]

I've added some articles to the OP to clarify some of what i have been reading lately.

[heatherdress]

No rush but there is much greater awareness, more information and more professional help.

[pamela7]

the rise in articles might reflect a change in public awareness, in parents moving from "guilty secrets"/repression/hiding, to coming out - all signs the closet's not needed anymore in many places now. Instead of fashion, this might be the the same thing as raising public awareness of anything charged with "social shame" e.g. people coming out over rape, a still much under-reported crime.

[Kelly DeWinter]

I hope not to sound cynical, Having raised two children (of whom i am immensely proud of as any parent) one thing i learned early is to allow kids a bit of a free hand in their growth. My biggest concern is for parents who try to make kids into something they are not. We have all known the parents who felt their kids were the greatest ______ (fill in the blank) and it turns out they are not physically or mentally or emotionally ready for what the parent wants them to do.

[pamela7]

pushy parents shaping their kids' lives - well it happens, school happens too - just as bad potentially. We do have a TG daughter-to-son who told us a few years ago. It's not really publish - he dresses as a male, acts very feminine if you ask me, we just accept him as he is, and his long-term TG F2M partner. You could call it fashionable, or just realise its coming out of the woodwork. We're the anti of pushy, we just support, which also means supporting things like TG, not pushing normality.

[Eryn]

I don't think that more children are transgendered, but it is now more likely that transgendered children will be encouraged to be themselves by parents who are better educated in transgendered issues.

Previously parents of transgendered children who sought out advice would often get it from people who knew nothing. They'd go to therapists who had never seen a TG client, to family members or to religious advisors who would give them very bad advice. They'd be told to suppress the child's expression, to punish the child for what they see as "aberrant behavior," or to take the child to quack therapists for the trans version of "conversion therapy."

Now, thanks to people like Jazz, they know that transgendered children exist, that they are not aberrations, and that specialized help is available to them. They are more willing to share their stories with others. This is why we are hearing about more TG children.

[ReineD]

I hope not to sound cynical, Having raised two children (of whom i am immensely proud of as any parent) one thing i learned early is to allow kids a bit of a free hand in their growth. My biggest concern is for parents who try to make kids into something they are not.

Studies do show that many children who are gender confused when young, outgrow it.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18981931
http://articles.latimes.com/2012/feb...-kids-20120223
http://www.lgbthealtheducation.org/w...dolescents.pdf

So parents do need to tread lightly without harming the child's sense of self in case the child is truly gender dysphoric. But maybe it's a question of degree. A little boy who wants to wear a princess costume for Halloween and who doesn't otherwise feel distressed over being a boy will not have the same dysphoria patterns as a boy who consistently and determinedly insists that she is a girl. Presumably, parents can and do tell the difference.

I dare say that most parents would prefer their children to not be transsexual, given the difficulties involved with societal acceptance of transition and I cannot see any parent "pushing" their child toward transition. By the time a child starts to take hormone blockers, he or she has likely been seen by a slew of professionals and has unfailingly identified as the opposite sex throughout their young lives. These are the families who get medical help for transition and so they do become part of the statistics that we read about. We don't hear from the parents for whom this was a passing phase.

[AnnieMac]

Ya know it just occurred to me because this current interest in transgender issues, like everything we do at least in the US, is start freaking out and going over the top to be politically correct, or get an overbearing handle over everything. My wife has been a teacher of kindergarden and Pre-school kids for 30 some years, and she has always had that little area in their classroom that was the "dress-up area" where kids could normally do what they do when the are 6 and under - play pretend. She of course had clothes of both of both genders -princess dresses, cooking aprons, army fatigues and boys farmer pants and boots, etc. She mentioned more than once, that all the kids, boys and girls would try and and play in these clothes, just normally exploring who they are. Shoot, even when i was in kindergarden in the '50s, we had that and I can remember more than once boys wearing the frilly aprons, and girls wearing the big boy shirts, it's normal for that age. Now the first time a boy comes home and tells his parents he was wearing an apron or a princess dress, they will think, OMG he is transgender, we need to get him to a therapist right away.
Also as I recall from my wife's classroom , and as far back as my own, kindergarden bathrooms were unisex, and we all went to the bathroom together, girls using the stalls, and boys using urinals or stalls. It was to teach at that age the there was a difference, at least physically.

[Robin414]

Interesting stats, significant increase in TG children? Complicated topic for sure but I think it's a number if things: children being more aware of the fact TG is real and may account for their feelings (thanks media and the Internet); parents being more accepting and understanding of TG (thanks media and internet); and the '5 percent' looking for (but not nessessarily wanting maybe in this case) another way to 'show off' to their peers how wonderful and 'in tune' they are?

[Dana44]

I have seen documents on kids that are TG. In some of them the parents are understanding. In others not so understanding. There have been a lot of them in the news and when they get older things have cropped up. Who would race to have a child like that. I think that the current political environment is causing a lot of this. It must be better for kids today who are TG. But statistics don't seem to support that and that is because many do not support it.

[AnnieMac]

This all kind of reminds me of a funny story back when I was in High school. All though I had been sneaking around wearing my sisters and mother's clothes for a few years before, the first time I ever became aware of anything remotely like transgender, was in freshman health class. I went to an all boys catholic school and of course this class was taught by this lughead coach and gym teacher, who used to goof on this one kid because becuase he was slightly "softer" in demeanor than the rest of the guys. This coach gave him the nickname in class of Double XX ( as in female chromosomes ).
So he is teaching us about this article he read about how now people can actually go out and have a sex change operation.
Well double XX raises his hand and asks " How much does it Cost?" Which of course got a huge laugh. Poor double XX wasn't interested in that in the least but was just generally curious. Later in life, double XX became a very successful college basketball coach. Life is funny sometimes.

[Robin414]

Nice post Annie, I remember high school phys ed myself (oh those days), I was a really clumsy 'jock' for lack of a better term and always teamed up with the underdog (in my case a REALLY sickly but brilliant chap...think Hawking early on) in pairs...I've always known we'll lose the battle...but maybe eventually win the war? 😉

[UNDERDRESSER]

Now the first time a boy comes home and tells his parents he was wearing an apron or a princess dress, they will think, OMG he is transgender, we need to get him to a therapist right away.

Oh please. Yeah, some, parents will over react, but they are the type that would do that anyway. A generally sensible set of parents will note that, and keep tabs on whether the kid feels the need to do it again, or asks for his own skirt, or her own hard hat construction guy costume.

Girl friends Sister told the story of the nephew seeing his Nan in a dress for the first time"What's that Nan?".......... "A dress" ..... "Can I have one?'

Sister's comment, "Guess we're going dress shopping tomorrow." He forgot about it, and he didn't pursue it later. He's seen me in a skirt several times, hasn't even asked me about it. If had shown interest, they would have let him explore, he didn't so they just let him live his own life.

[PaulaQ]

You would expect the number of referrals to rise as more parents become aware that some kids are, in fact, trans, and what sorts of behaviors to watch for. The implied idea in the OP that parents are forcing their kids to have sex changes to be trendy or whatever seems highly unlikely to me.

And while I can't claim direct knowledge about the UK, the programs for trans kids here in the US that I'm aware of involve gatekeepers. (There's such a program here in Dallas, Children's Medical's Genecis program. I also know a local therapist who works extensively with trans youth, and have talked with them about this.)

Fun fact - programs for trans youth are geared towards reversibly blocking puberty and giving the kids time, therapy, and real life experience to figure out whether they need to medically transition. They are also, as best I can tell, as binary as one could imagine, which isn't surprising given that they are predominantly designed by cis people.

@Kelly DeWinter - do you doubt that there are many trans people who figure out their actual gender identity when they are very young? Also, forcing a cisgender kid to be trans won't work. This has nothing to do with socialization - being trans isn't learned.

[Mayo]

There may be something 'fashionable' about it, perhaps as a way to demonstrate how enlightened a parent one is - there's even apparently a term, 'transtrender', for people who aren't trans but think it's 'cool'. Trends aside, I think that parents being open to having bi or transgender kids is generally a good thing - if more people think this way it will make it easier in future for those who are trans and in general will break down gender barriers.

And I agree with PaulaQ - those who are cis will tend to remain cis.

[AnnieMac]

haha . .thats a great word Mayo. Well than I wanna be a Crosstrender!