IMHO it takes three ingredients...Sugar (appearance), spice (manerisms), and everything nice (voice) but how much of each?
Let's say to 'pass' you need 100 units of 'girl power' but does the scale slide (like 20, 60, 20 or maybe 60, 30, 10)?
And not to exclude those that just plain don't care...do you just plain don't care...I don't bake stuff, OK! 😠 😉
I think those are the ingredients but it's relative to each individual. Depending on who you are the percentages of each will change. Some of us would need more of one and less of the other. Then I do believe experience and confidence stirs into the overall mix.
Hmmm, good point Bimini...the difference between a line cook and a Chef? (I must be hungry, all these food analogies) 😉
If there was one I would follow it LOLOL
The recipe is:
Start taking hormones before you hit puberty.
Everyone else:
Get Robin to cook you up a nice meal with lots of wine and you won't care if you pass.
angela lol...
No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.
I believe at least 51% (that is, the key ingredient) is in the other people, not you. Translation: if the person you cross in the street locks eyes with you, and if that person happens to be an adult woman, sorry but you have been read. Girls just know. Then again, if something in your presentation makes you stand out, more people (I mean women) will look at you and therefore more will read you. On the other hand, men don't notice anything but your legs, ass and boobs. And we should know because we are men, right?
The problem is that all the money in the world would not buy most of us the number of "girl power" units (as you describe) necessary to be perceived as a female in 100% of all social encounters. That is just a fact of life.
So the best advice when it comes to passing is to always do your best but not be obsessive about it because most of us will never in a million years reach the goal. Own who you are, or what you do, and face this wonderful world of ours with respect and confidence. There is your 51%. How close you get from there to your 100 points has more to do with your personal result with the genetic lottery and an ability to do body modifications. As I said, very few will get anywhere near 100. It is what it is.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
I understand that and mostly agree. What you said largely describes how I have approached things. On the other hand, I know a woman who would almost make the original Twiggy look voluptuous, yet she is VERY attractive. There is an intangible quality in there somewhere.Originally Posted by Sky
Going back to the original premise, there is a GREAT range regarding how genetic women fit into those categories, so I don't think there is an easy way to pick values for us. I suspect that a low score in one attribute may be compensated by a higher score in another. Consider the speaking voices of Lauren Bacall or Sharon Gless; both 'way outside of what you would normally expect for genetic women. But, clearly they scored well above usual expectations in appearance.
Anyway, hard to quantify...
DeeAnn
"Find me a man who's interesting enough to have dinner with and I'll be happy" (puffs away some smoke)
I like to think we are approaching a time when we don't have to worry too much about whether we pass or don't. More and more, we see posts about us girls getting read and nobody appearing to care. I don't even try to pass. When I feel like going out as my male self in a dress, that's what I do. Yes, people look, but nothing bad happens, not even a giggle. Men say nothing at all. Women look at me and smile, maybe compliment my shoes. Otherwise, they say nothing as well. Sales ladies are gems! They never hesitate in the slightest to help me find something to purchase, set up a fitting room, offer advice, etc. I really think they ENJOY helping a man shop for dresses.
Anyway, dawn is beginning to break up the darkness for us, just as it did for GLB's in the past. They accomplished it by being OUT, but not in an "in your face" kind of way. Just so that most people in the "straight " world could see that they personally know someone who is G or L or B and that they are good folks. That should be our path. Just get out there, whether you pass, or don't pass, or don't care. Every one of us that does helps us all.
Oh yes, Baby Girl had it goin' on!!
There is passing and there is passing. Driving through town or walking down the street and sitting dressed in a restaurant and ordering dinner are two different extremes. And some of us have no hope of passing because of our size and build.
I believe I can do the driving and walking thing but not the restaurant thing.
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