I did not weigh in on the recent discussion about being left behind, because the OP seemed so all inclusive that after several readings I was having difficulty fitting my thoughts into a concise essay without missing the boat entirely.
It is mentioned often that gender is non-binary, and I would have to agree, because it is not a concrete absolute but rather is an abstract concept defined by society. As such it can fluctuate over time and from place to place, and person to person. Gender is either masculine, feminine or neutral. On the other hand, sex is primarily binary with the exception of a small number of indeterminate situations. For individuals, there is very little correlation between sex and gender because of the variable perceptions that can occur about gender. It not only applies to individuals, but also applies to objects, activities and so on. What applies to the male sex is masculine, the female sex is feminine, and to either sex is neutral. Clothing has a gender, and that is the logical starting point for my discussion.
Two terms have come into usage in recent decades; cisgender and transgender. My contention is that both are meaningless terms because of the nature of gender. As an abstract concept, gender has no finite extremity. Everyone's concept of cisgender is likely much different. As to transgender, if you change from male to female clothing, that is a transgender action, but it is totally dependent on the determination of gender for those items of clothing. That determination is technically subject to change by the basic concept of gender. But that is not how the word transgender has come to be used. In the minds of both the media and the public, transgender refers to individuals, not their clothing or what they do. Furthermore, it refers to those individuals who either have or are contemplating changing, but what are they changing? It is not their gender, because they are attempting to align their physical body to their gender. So what they are changing is their sex, which to date is not a complete chromosomal possibility. However for all intents and purposes we accept that change as complete.
It is impossible to change sex or even be in the process of doing so (i.e. transgender in the minds of most) without coming out of the closet. Therefore most of the activism has been carried out with this basic premise in mind. It has been carried out with the primary purpose being protecting the safety and liberty of those in the process of and completion of transition, in other words the "transgenders". This has been a noble fight. One of the tools used in this effort has been the inclusion of everyone in the community as falling under that umbrella. The diversity of the community is often mentioned, but I fear that it falls on deaf ears, as the media obviously equates TG with transition.
The aforementioned thread, was somewhat divided on the point of whether or not there is a significant difference between transsexuals and crossdressers and the needs of each. I am of the opinion that there is a sizable difference. For one, coming out and going out (two different concepts) are not particularly essential for crossdressers, (but a little of both may be desireable), but for transsexuals they are absolutely essential. Understanding, can be more difficult for crossdressers to achieve because their needs cannot be prepacked into a neat explanation that applies to all in the same way that "gender identity" does. CD's are all different from a motivational standpoint and the concentration of the activism in recent years toward gender issues has left all other motivations to fall under the category of fetishism. This term has very negative connotations that make it difficult when dealing with family and friends.
Finally, there is the question of attitude, which creates problems for CD's that are seldom discussed here or elsewhere. We do hear about the frustration felt by many CD's toward the "just do it" attitude of many otherwise well meaning people. It expresses a tendency to minimize the concerns of individual crossdressers that may not be intentioned but nonetheless exists. Also, there is the attitude that everyone who crossdresses is simply somewhere on the road to ultimate transition, but most will never complete the journey for a variety of reasons, This thought was very well expressed by Gretchen who said:
"I believe part of that fear is not of whatever repercussions or embarrassment one would face personally by presenting in public, but of the thrall or inexorable pull those public outings might have. So, you go out dressed the way you see yourself in your mind's eye. You are not outed, you have pleasant interactions...you meet kind, sympathetic people or fellow CDs...doesn't that reinforce all the good feelings about CD? You do it more and more, get better and better at it...and then wonder what it would be like to just live that way? I suspect many self-proclaimed crossdressers are really on the TS end of the spectrum but the fear wins out."
So, yes, I do believe that crossdressers are being left behind, either by minimization of their needs and concerns or by painting a portrait of them that has undesirable negativity or contradicts their own desires.
Veronica
Originally Posted by AlleyKat
