Therapist verses Gender Therapist.

[debstar]

OK so this in some way may sound like an obvious question but is a Gender Therapist really better then a general therapist?

I have been seeing my therapist for a bit now (10 hours) and while we hit it off, and feel like I am getting a lot out of our sessions, I wonder what a Gender specialist could give me.

My therapist admits that I am the first Trans person he has had but is keen to see me evolve and learn from that. I suppose I have a nurturing nature and like the idea that he can gain experience through our interactions. Otherwise how can one become a Gender specialist? (short of actually having transitioned)


Debs.

[Marcelle]

Hello Deb,

Being educated in the field . . . not all therapists are created equal (at least not in Canada). When I first started down the path the military required me to see a general therapist within the military medical system to discuss things. He knew about transgender but admitted he was not qualified to get into the mechanics of the whole TG spectrum. I was then referred to a therapist who deals specifically with gender identity issues and began a two year long process. She had a bit more insight in all aspects of the spectrum from TG/CD to TG/TS and was able to guide me along in a way I don't think a general therapist could. However, if you have a good relationship with your therapist and he is helping you in a manner which you need then I say continue. I just find I have talked to others who go to general therapists who don't have a clue on how to deal with gender identity issues and tend to approach things more as a way to cure vice integrate. Indeed I have several colleagues in the field who still prescribe to the belief that it is a choice which can be resolved through therapy. My two cents.

Cheers

Marcelle

[AllieSF]

Another thing to consider is that many of us here on this site may have gender identity issues as well as other more common world issues, whether they be associated with relationships, self esteem, communication, or whatever. So, yes, I can see that a general therapist can be quite helpful in sorting out some of the more common issues that us humans have from time to time, and may even be sharp enough to also help with identity issues too. However, if the other issues are minor, I would think that a therapist with specific gender identity experience would be better over the long run and probably short run too. Good luck.

[debstar]

Thanks, yes I may seek out a specialist for a few sessions as I go further down the path mainly because im curious as to what they may bring to the table.

But yes I am very happy with my theripist. He is nothing more then a guiding hand allowing me to find my self. I do 99% of the talking and it's good.

Also yes I have many issues aside from GD to deal with.


Debs.

[MissDanielle]

When I first felt things start to really come to the forefront, I emailed a psychologist friend who sent me a list of gender therapists to contact.

[Nigella]

The biggest difference will come to the fore if/when, certainly in the uk, you need to advance your transition in the respect of surgery and/or name change. Only a Gender Therapist will be able to confirm your GD and are a suitable candidate for SRS etc. If you need a GRC (in UK) to change your official gender, again only a specialist in GD can write the report required.

[debstar]

OK Nigella, that is probably the clincher for me as I had assumed any therapist could write the letter. Yes I am in the UK.

[Nigella]

From the Gender Recognition official .Gov website

Report A must be made by a registered medical practitioner or registered psychologist practising in the field of gender dysphoria and must include the details of your
diagnosis of gender dysphoria.

I cannot swear to the requirements for surgery as it has been a number of years since I needed 2 letters and the pathway has changed somewhat, but I doubt that will have changed

[Eringirl]

i have had a "regular" therapist for over 15 years. She is my goto person when life gets a bit much. So, see her on and off. Spent quite a bit of time with her in the beginning as I was trying to figure out what was happening to me. Once we elminated a whole bunch of stuff, it bacame apparent to her that I had GD and was Trans. She was the first one to admit that this was "out of her league" and referred my to a gender therapist. That was a very wise move. The gender therapist understand a the journey and has context to base her observations on. She also knows the right questions to ask to we can gain clarity around issues and has resources availabel to refer to for name and gender change on ID, endocrinogist that are experienced working with Trans cliets etc.

Bottom line....for me....They are both worth their weight in gold for my well being.

[Robin414]

I've been to a therapist who 'does' gender therapy three times about a 9 mo ago but I'm planning on seeing a real Phyc. Dr. for a proper 'diagnosis'. My therapist kinda said 'Looks like you got this' and handed me some information on the local LGBT community and a list of 'gender friendly' docs. Yah, I wear it well but I really don't think I 'got this' yet 😕

[SuzanneS]

I started seeing a "therapist" a little while back. She's fine, we have talked a lot about just about everything every two weeks for an hour each time.

Last week she tells finally tells me that I'm not TG because I don't hate my body.....

Right, I don't hate my body. It's the only body I have and I was raised to "deal with it and move on"....well, I am dealing with it, doesn't mean that I have to hate my body..... I think?

I don't know...maybe it's time to look for an actual Gender Therapist? I'm new to the whole therapist thing...

Suzanne

[Eryn]

My therapist admits that I am the first Trans person he has had but is keen to see me evolve and learn from that.

Referring to the wisdom of Doyle Dane Bernbach:

learning to fix.jpg

While expecting one's therapist to be exclusively a gender therapist is a bit much, I would want some expertise in the field as a prerequisite. My therapist came recommended by TS friends and she has been very helpful to me.

She also counsels people in other fields, which I consider a positive as a person's issues usually aren't all related to being TG. I'd worry that an exclusive gender therapist would be a bit isolated from a full worldview.

[pamela7]

I can't comment on the contrast for TS folk because I've not been there yet, tho it looks like the domain knowledge and resource connections would be useful by default with the specialist.

What I can contribute is some thoughts about a good therapist. I've worked long-term with over 200 clients (50 hours or more each, some for years), and I have therefore some insight on what works.

One key thing is that the therapist has to keep their reality OUT of the client's, and domain knowledge can get in the way of that - a point for the generalist.

Another key thing is that for every process/way of working/facilitator, there is an allergic responder, so the therapist has to have a large toolkit, be adaptive, and able to use contrary even contradicting models at times in order to facilitate a client. Sometimes as clean as a whistle with no reality intrusion, and sometimes dirty and challenging as hell.

Liking the therapist does not come into it, really it is about competence - and the problem here is the lay person has no idea on the criteria for that. So, instead: do they avoid making suggestions, do they challenge you, do they get you to look where you don't want to, do they ask questions you did not expect, do you feel sustained improvement as a result of the sessions?

:-)

PS Eryn, there are reasons sometimes why the joint-learning is better than then experienced - as opposed to VW's no two TS are the same, and assumptions are the mothers of all errors ...

[Eryn]

PS Eryn, there are reasons sometimes why the joint-learning is better than then experienced - as opposed to VW's no two TS are the same, and assumptions are the mothers of all errors ...

I agree, to a point. My therapist has indicated that I am different from other clients, particularly in the area of having a healthy marriage. She says that she is learning from me as much as I from her. At the same time, she has a repertoire of information that helps her put my situation in perspective and allows her to advise me with confidence.

Oh, and long experience has taught me that, despite their looks, no two Volkswagens are the same!

[debstar]

Thanks all. I too worry that a specialist may just focus on my gender issues only. And do not get me wrong that is a big issue, but I do have other issues do deal with as well so would not like to feel forced down a particular narrative.

I'm not sure I am trans actually, and hearing all the stories of heart ache here I would much prefer a different diagnosis.

For me my non gender specialist is somthing of a safe haven at this point in time. Haxing said that I am not closed minded and will at some point meet with a specialist just out of interest.


Debs.