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Thread: Wife's Attitude Toward Your Dressing

  1. #101
    Member Tina June's Avatar
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    #2 for me.

  2. #102
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    #4 With the exception I hide my stuff in plain sight.

  3. #103
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    #4 for me!!!! :'(

  4. #104
    Junior Member Janet161's Avatar
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    OK, so it is constantly changing. #5 for the first 24 years of marriage. Then came the botched coming out and an extremely tense #4. Six months of that misery led to the re-reveal and my dear wife did her best to hold on to #3. Two months of that was too much and she threw me out of the house Lifetime Movie style. She didn't really want to throw me out so I came back, conditioned on living at least a #3. She did her best, helped once with make-up, lent me a skirt, getting all the way to a #2.5. She was able to hold that for about six weeks. Now we are somewhere between an unhappy #3 and #4.

  5. #105
    Senior Member JocelynJames's Avatar
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    2 for me but we go out as often as I'm comfortable with. I'm usually very private so although I feel the need to go out, I very rarely do. She knows this and doesn't push- "when you're ready " she says.
    If you only knew the power of the pink fog! ~Joss

  6. #106
    Member Meg East's Avatar
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    Put me down as a 2.

  7. #107
    Senior Member UNDERDRESSER's Avatar
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    Somewhere between 1 and 2. (GF not wife)

    Has never bought me female clothes, though has given me some old yoga pants to lounge around in when I was visiting her place before we moved in together. Has bought me some colourful male stuff, to encourage me in more exotic outfits. Example, came home the other day from the thrift store with a fairly spectacular waistcoat in an embroidered brocade, doesn't quite fit, so haven't used it yet, another project in my clothes modifying pile. Has given the thumbs down to some clothing/outfit choices, though mostly that's been a matter of style rather than gender. Has never objected to how I dress around the house, or how I come to bed. I could wish for more actual enthusiasm, but that's perhaps being a bit greedy.
    "Normal is what you get when you average out the weirdness that everybody has." Quote from my SO

    Normal is a setting on a washing machine, or another word for average.

    The fact that I wear a skirt as a male should not be taken as a comment on what you do, or do not wear, or how you wear it.

  8. #108
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    My wife has moved from a 2.5 to a 1.5 almost overnight. 2016 could be a good year. I've only been cross-dressing for a year, always at home. My wife, let us call her Kathy, seemed to accept it, helped me find right sized bras, gave me primers on eyeshadow and mascara. But she seemed to draw the line when the breast forms I ordered arrived.
    "I think you are going a little too far," she said.
    Still, no problems with my nighties camisoles panties and makeup.
    I would wear a camisole and panties to work for the secret little through it gave me. Just recently I have been wearing the breast forms when I go out -usually covered up by a sweater, but the sweater came un zipped yesterday and she saw my "breasts" through my shirt. No problem. I bought my first dress yesterday - with Kathy's help of course and just love the way it moves across my ass. And today Kathy and I went to Lane Bryant so she could use her gift card.
    It was my wife who gave me the courage to ask if I could use the dressing room to try stuff on.
    It was no problem at all.
    What a liberating couple of days!!!

  9. #109
    Silver Member Marcia Blue's Avatar
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    I am living in a #2 world. Quite grateful that she is that accepting. Maybe one day we will venture closer to #1.
    Marcia (LOVES) Blue

  10. #110
    I am me! TrishaTX's Avatar
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    I am between 2 and 3...stuff is out but we are still working towards a full #2
    No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.

  11. #111
    New Member flo's Avatar
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    My wife is a 1. She has bought most of my clothes. She prefers me dressed and often says she is disappointed if I don't dress.

  12. #112
    Work In Progress Melody A's Avatar
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    #4 all the way.
    Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
    - Dr. Seuss

  13. #113
    Senior Member Adelaide's Avatar
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    #4 and I'm so disappointed...

  14. #114
    Member Helen Waite's Avatar
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    Started out with 5. Then she found all my stuff and destroyed it. We're now at 4, after a lot of therapy for her. I can buy things, but she wants no part of any of it. Even seeing what I buy. Still, it's an improvement.

  15. #115
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    4/5 Well today I said to my wife "since you won't dress up for me how about I wear a dress?" she said if you put on a dress it better be when I'm not around.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  16. #116
    Member Joni Beauman's Avatar
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    3 to 4; she has borrowed clothes and given me a few things. I have a special dresser in bathroom and dress nightly - after hours. But she shrieks if she sees Joni. Mixed signals seem to be the norm many of us are navigating. Joni

  17. #117
    Member josrphine's Avatar
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    Hi Krisi, Lets see when i first met my wife an I told her, she was a soild 2, when I moved in she wore more of my cloths then I did. Now a big 1 as I am able to dess any time I like an when we go out she would rather have Josephine then Joe. I have the same stile hair an color as we go out as sisters most of the time. Jo

  18. #118
    Member Martina's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=Krisi;3870203]OK, this is sort of a poll. What is your wife's attitude towards your crossdressing?


    I guess I'm between a 2 & 3

    2) She accepts it. She may shop with me, she doesn't make snide remarks or give dirty looks when I am dressed around her and she treats me normally when I'm dressed. I don't have to hide my stuff in the basement, it's hanging in the closet with my other clothes.

    3) She tolerates it. I know she would rather I didn't do it. She may make comments from time to time.

    Of course if we are going out, it has to be Homer, she doesn't want the neighbours to see or meet Martina.

    When we have been on a short break with friends on the last night Martina comes out and joins in the with the fun for the evening/night.

    My wife has told me that my legs look good and has remarked how well I walk when wearing 4" heels.

    Could it be better? I suppose, but I think I'm pretty lucky and I don't want to mess up what I have.

    Martina
    The girl my Mother longed for trapped inside a boys body If she had only known I was there.

  19. #119
    Silver Member Sarah Louise's Avatar
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    5 for me. Would love to tell, but while it would be great to become a 1, 2 or even 3 ( actually, I think I might cope with a 4) I worry it will be a 6 and we split up. It's such a potentially life-changing gamble to come out.

  20. #120
    Member Erika Lyne's Avatar
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    I'll play:

    The simple answer: mostly a 2 with tendencies above and below.


    The complicated one:
    My wife is great to me but, she has qualities all over the lower numbered half of the spectrum. She does buy things for me without me present: 1) when I ask (i.e.: nylons, makeup or other toiletries), 2) when I don't have to ask for celebrations (i.e. birthday, Christmas). We do frequently go window shopping together, me always in drab. She will pick things out but never designates who she thinks would look good in it. I can sometimes figure out what she likes for me-- mostly by the size or the cut of the neckline, other times I'm not sure where she is going with her remarks. We have, on several occasions, specifically gone fem shopping for me. As another member mentioned, I've taken several items into a men's dressing room and sent her pictures of what I thought looked best. Her replies were always supportive and constructive. On a few occasions she has suggested that I go out in public solo. I think her biggest fear is us being made, recognized and/or embarrassed. Part of this is also our difference in height, almost 1' difference if I wear anything more than a 2" heel. I just don't think I pass as well as I would like--too tall, broad shouldered and just not passable. She also does not protest my dressing at home but if I dress and catch her off guard (& I can only assume she has time to prepare before she sees me dressed if she hears me walk in heels on the hardwood floors) she always turns away, just for a moment, before she is able to then turn back to me and treat me as normal. It is kind of like she is shifting gears. Also, depending on her mood, she will make a hurtful remark or gesture about me dressing, one of her frequent comments is,"I was going to ask you to go to the store for/with me but, I guess not now. I'll just go by myself." and then escapes quickly before I can descide if I would like to change clothes and go with her. She knows my fem name but only uses it in the Third Person and almost always when we fight, even if the disagreement started off with nothing to do with my dressing. Lastly, besides underdressing in panties only, dressing for romantic times are off limits. I tend to push the boundaries because presenting as myself is emotionally uplifting to me. Her bedroom support would be a huge step from tolerance to acceptance but, I try to understand where she is coming from.

    As I said before, she is fluid but overall great towards my dressing. I would love for more support from her but I understand where she is coming from. Just like she cannot change my needs I cannot change hers, only she can and she has done wonders for me thus far.

    Hugs,
    -E

    PS: Wow! 120 replies in this short of a time? I support the thought of this thread as a Sticky. It has been quite educational and eye opening as far as "We are not alone." would be concerned.
    Last edited by Erika Lyne; 01-02-2016 at 06:14 AM.
    **Just trying to happily be me.**

    Hugs!
    -E

  21. #121
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    #5 My wife is against cding

  22. #122
    Junior Member Michelle Fox's Avatar
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    After 25 years of marriage, still at #5, would be happy even if things moved to #4. If I can work up the courage to have "the talk" it could be #3.

  23. #123
    Platinum Member Suzie S.'s Avatar
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    I'd say a 1.9, only due to no public outings together. I will never take for granted how fortunate I am.
    GO RED SOX!!!

    Suzie

  24. #124
    Aspiring Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    OK, this is sort of a poll. What is your wife's attitude towards your crossdressing?

    1) She seems to actually enjoy it. She shops with me, sometimes buys me stuff on her own, she will sometimes ask me to dress when I wasn't planning on it and she willingly goes out in public with me as two women on the town.

    2) She accepts it. She may shop with me, she doesn't make snide remarks or give dirty looks when I am dressed around her and she treats me normally when I'm dressed. I don't have to hide my stuff in the basement, it's hanging in the closet with my other clothes.

    3) She tolerates it. I know she would rather I didn't do it. She makes negative comments from time to time and might make a face when she sees me dressed as a woman. She doesn't like to talk about it. My stuff has to be hidden away where she knows it's there but doesn't have to look at it.

    4) Don't ask, don't tell. She knows I do it but refuses to take part in any way including seeing me dressed as a woman. I have to hide my stuff where she cannot find it because she might destroy it.

    5) I've been afraid to tell her so she doesn't know about my dressing.


    I'll go first: #2. If my wife gets up early and goes to the gym or runs errands, it's the same reaction when she gets home, regardless of whether Krisi or Homer meets her at the door. Of course if we are going out, it has to be Homer, she doesn't want the neighbors or friends to meet Krisi. Could it be better? I suppose, but I think I'm pretty lucky and I don't want to mess up what I have.

    Anyone else?
    #2, with a mix of #1. I don't know if she enjoys it, but she does accept and support my CDing. She does not want me out in public dressed, and I am respecting that 100%.

    She does go shopping with me, and since we are similar in size, she also tries on the clothes so I know the clothes that are being purchased will fit.

  25. #125
    Senior Member Karen RHT's Avatar
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    Add me to the "mostly a 2, with a touch of 1 and 3 list." She does shop with me and even encourages with "buy it" or "you'd look good in that" comments. I don't need to hide anything, but she isn't comfortable with me in makeup or a wig. Then again, she has offered me cosmetics she doesn't use anymore. She simply won't participate in any form of "educational" dialogue, and is paranoid that neighbours or friends will see me and question her about it. Other days she is absolutely fine with me in a skirt or dress the entire day around the house.


    Karen

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