There's actually a varied difference of opinion on that. Some say that if you stay in there long enough, and wish deeply enough, things will crawl out of the woodwork of your mirror-frames and even your reflection will begin to talk back to you. Then your closet becomes the proverbial 'wardrobe' to Narnia, and your internal gender conflict will seem like a lion battling a witch.Originally Posted by Lauri K
just sayin...
ps: you could also turn into a moth. Moths can live for years in closets.
Last edited by Wen4cd; 01-08-2016 at 02:08 PM.
And so we go, on with our lives...
We know the Truth, but prefer Lies.
Lies are simple, simple is Bliss.
Why go against tradition, when we can admit defeat,
Live in Decline, be the victim of our own design?
"In the closet" can have many meanings. I am en femme more than I am not. I go out in public several times a week. I am not openly "out" to neighbors, friends, or relatives. My daughters and their husbands "know" but have never seen me or photos of me en femme.
Hugs, Carole
After far too many years of hiding the only things in my closet now are my clothes.
I truly wish I had had the courage to come out when I was in my 20's (or earlier) but those were times that were not as "open" as today.
I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !
I'm going with " out " Donna. No matter how you want to define it really. Wife knows, family knows, half the sales force I the city know. So I'm still going with out.
You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because your all the same
My wife knows, kids don't. Been "out" in public while away on business, but very much "in" back home.
I agree moths can live for many years in closets and they will eat your pretty dresses new or worn, so why let them stay there to feed the moths.............my message to the audience here is to go live your life as moth free as you can.......as so far my mirror frames are not doing anything at the moment but telling me to keep pushing on
Most likely that means pushing the boundaries and getting out of the proverbial closet before the moths eat your pretty wardrobe
Alternatively, I suppose you can just stay in the closet or wardrobe, but beware you may get moth-balled if you stay there too long
Gender conflict is truly a real battle, and many of us face it each and every day.......it is nothing to be laughed at .....but something that we must all learn to deal with...............
Take some time to think about it, but for me I feel really sad that we are philosophically talking about moths and sitting ourselves in a closet rather than figuring out who we really are and how to live our lifes with this conflict.
I have taken years to think about this, and I'm still not certain
In the closet, are we who we truly are? We are true to ourselves there, and to our gods, whatever they may be.
Out of the closet, would we not be just as we are in everyday life, always putting on a persona to deal socially. Sometimes I am afraid that if I were to go out en femme, and try to 'be myself' I would take this special part of me that is precious, and just soil it with banal social contact, and taint it with the same old self-consciousness and social compromise that the closet is blissfully free from.
It's not always fear of discovery that keeps people to themselves. The closet can be a cloister, a personal monastery. Sometimes the mirror does come alive and talk, if you're alone with yourself and have no one else to perform to, to show off to, or no expectations to meet.
I think maybe the best thing would be to strike a balance. Sometimes you need to get out, sometimes you need to be alone.
But I agree that feeling that you can't get out would be absolutely intolerable.
And so we go, on with our lives...
We know the Truth, but prefer Lies.
Lies are simple, simple is Bliss.
Why go against tradition, when we can admit defeat,
Live in Decline, be the victim of our own design?
Not really in a closet but i stay in my house.Although i have been out for halloween a couple of times .Im not sure if that really counts as being out ?
I have a hubcap diamond star halo
I dress nights after my wife goes to sleep - chores and whatnot; when traveling for work would go out to eat or shopping dressed in evening. Did get the nerve to ask my wife to borrow her coat to go to Dutch Girl two nights ago, letting her know my plans. She seemed fine with it (turned her head when I walked through room to go) but is still concerned I might want to take the big leap. Dutch Girl kind of damped that notion for me. So "in" but leaning out the door a bit. Joni
Out with my dressing? well ok, its usually a cornbread dressing with the usual trimmin... Oohhh, you mean my dressing... I hide under the floorboards in the back of the closet. Don't think the world is ready for what I have to offer!
This is really a simple thing to figure out. Consider: How many people do you know and have known in your life (and before YOU came out, NOT counting anyone you've met online as a crossdresser) who are/were crossdressers? Should be about 1 in every 40 or so. So, if you've known, oh, 800 people in your lifetime, assuming half are male, you probably knew 10 crossdressers. How many of them do you know who have identified themselves as crossdressers to the public (outside of the family, because family has a good reason not to want it known)? I suppose it will depend on where you live, but in general, we have all known more people than we think we have. Because if they're a crossdresser, word will probably get around, slowly but surely. People love to gossip. So, working with the above figures, if you didn't know of anyone who is a crossdresser, then all 10 are in the closet. Other than those who live in, say, Greenwich Village in Manhattan or some other well known haven for alternative sexuality folks, you're probably not going to find higher incidence of crossdressers in one town from the next.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I like to think i'm out of the closet because some family knows, all my neighbors have seen me coming out of my apartment dressed up. On the other hand if anyone at work found out I would be transferring to the other side of the country. I'm willing to wager more people are in the closet than out. It just feels soo much safer in the closet, but it gets too boring for my liking.
In the closet or out? It's just not that simple -but what in life is?
As far as being 'out' to my wife, family, (RW)friends, colleagues is concerned - I'm firmly IN the proverbial closet and don't imagine that that will ever change. It's a pain but it is what it is.
I'm no celebrity but I am sufficiently well known in certain circles to have, very occasionally, had someone who I don't recognise greet me by name. So, as far as Judith is concerned there's a 100 mile 'no fly zone' centred on home.
Otherwise, when away from home, I think that I'm reasonably 'out'. On my last trip away from home I actually spent more time en femme than in boy mode.
Out, or in? It depends on the context.
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