How did CDer connect prior to the Internet

[Robinadress]

For the first 20 years of my life the internet didn’t exist. I remember very well the few times I found an article in a magazine or in the newspaper. Especially I remember when I was 14 years old I read an article in the newspaper about two transvestites going out together in my own town. I was so fascinated and glad I found something I could relate to. They were both married with kids. At the same time it was scary. I was scared that maybe one day I would go out in public just like them and risking being caught by someone who knew me. In the article they informed about the local support group, FPE. I tried all I could to forget the name of the group so I wouldn’t contact them. Of course it was impossible to forget. I remember several times the next years I traveled to my library to read the article again. Hmmm, I really feel old when writing this.

6 years later I picked up the phone and made the call. One week later I attended their meeting. I was probably too young, and I didn’t feel the need to go back there. The people I met was very nice too me, but I kept on further on my own. These were the days I bought my first pc and a hole new time for getting information and meeting other was starting.

[Trish]

In the early 1970's, when I first started dressing, I thought I was the only male that dressed, for many years.
I know differently know.

[Leighcdmd]

Before the Internet, for many of us, it was a frustrating, time consuming and tedious process. The principal vehicle consisted of classified ads in the few, hard to find CD magazines or in the alternative papers - The Phoenix (Boston) or The City Paper (Washington). One would either place or respond to an ad via snail mail and hopefully get a response. This meant, for many of us, getting a private mail box and checking it regularly. The process took weeks. Then came the Internet and a whole new world opened for all of us. Thank you Vint Cerf, DARPA.....oh....and you too Al Gore.

[heatherdress]

There were pioneers who worked to establish credibility, acceptance, support and ways to enable crossdressers to meet, learn and stay connected. JoAnn Roberts who recently passed away is a terrific example. She published a magazine and created crossdressing events, one of which is still very active annually in Delaware. I fortunately met JoAnn before she passed away and she was a beautiful, intelligent visionary and spokesperson.

There is a history on her website: http://www.cdspub.com/jar.html.

There is also another good history about crossdressers' socialization efforts over the past 50 years in her obituary: http://www.tgforum.com/wordpress/ind...s-passed-away/

RIP JoAnn and thank you to pioneers who established events and published magazines and newsletters.

[Rosemary+]

Thanks Ladies for all the responses , I never thought I'd get tha many replies!
Heather, thanks for the link a little bit of history
Rosie

[sometimes_miss]

There were support groups out there, just not a lot of them. You'd have to go to a major city, and, there was usually just one even there. The only reason I knew about other men who crossdressed was from the Kinsey report. That was all I found for years. No one else was discussing us, as it was just assumed by all that we were gay or transsexual. There were also clubs that catered to fetishists and alternative lifestyles, dom/sub couples, etc., where we could go and be generally accepted (although there were always a few who thought their own kink was perfectly normal, but everyone else was weird). But again, you wouldn't usually find these clubs outside the larger cities. A single male going to those clubs had about a zero chance of finding a single woman there, at least that was my experience.

[Sarah Beth]

Before the internet I just didn't I had an idea there must be others out there like but I doubted there were very many. Since the internet if you are talking in person I have only met one. It doesn't seem to make any difference what my desires are in that area there just don't seem to be any close enough or any close by with any interest in meeting

[CarolBrown]

I didn't, nor had the clue how too...

Ironically, I have came out as a cross dresser too... A few of my close friends knew and they held my secret, but, that's effectively a lifetime ago, whereby I have moved to different areas and no longer know where they live or even if they are still alive... So safe to say I am in the closet and now reluctant to come out... I just dressed then (as I do now) firmly behind closed and locked doors, when I know that I will not be caught...

Similarly the Internet wasn't about, and even when it first did come around the likes of compuserve and the original AOL where incredibly slow and still didn't have the CD forums... As far as I was concerned, I was just the 'kinky' bloke down the street who enjoyed wearing his sisters clothing...

[LydiaL]

Never met another crossdresser before the internet.

And even today, away from the larger cities, it is hard to meet others.

[SHY KIM]

Phil Donahue the daytime talk show out of Chicago was very helpful in reaffirming I wasn't "the only one out there"
Penthouse letters (sorry) at least also brought it to my attention that I wasn't the "only girl out there"

[jaquie]

The Village Voice carried ads for crossdressing parties usually held at NYC and Long Island bars. The scene was hopping in NY in the 80's and 90's. It was actually far better than it is today.

[Ceera]

In the 1960's, you could find ads in popular magazines, and even in children's comic books, for a place called "Michael Salem's TV Boutique". As a child I wondered for a while what the connection was between women's shoes or clothes and television... Later I put it together that in that context, TV meant 'transvestite', and not 'Television'.

There were other ads in magazines in those days for clothes for cross dressers, or for other kinky things, but that was the really big source, other than Fredrick's of Hollywood.

[Kellitgdet]

I live in metro Detroit and I used the Metro Times weekly papers classifieds to meet and find out about activities in Detroit. The first Cross Dressing shop I went to was Lavender and Lace. I'll always remember going there and being fitted with a corset, it was wonderful being treated like a lady by the sales assistant. They use to have monthly meeting for cross dressers. I had my first makeup makeover there. I miss that shop.
Janet's Closet is a great shop in Detroit for everything breast forms, wigs, makeup, heels .... fantastic staff.

[flatlander_48]

R+:

I have to admit that everytime I see your original post it reminds me of a question from my kids back in the day: "Daddy, what did you do before television?".

You went down a flight of stairs to a red door. You had to knock 3 times, then two more and a guy opened the little panel. You then said "Joyce sent me" and the door opened to a large room where people were dressed in all sorts of feminine clothing drinking champagne.

I think Friend of Dorothy would probably have also worked...

The Village Voice carried ads for crossdressing parties usually held at NYC and Long Island bars. The scene was hopping in NY in the 80's and 90's. It was actually far better than it is today.

As I understand it, there are noticeably fewer gay venues than there used to be. It seems that as more folks have gone mainstream, there is less need for gay specific bars and clubs. I wonder if what you said about how the 80's/90's compares with now mirrors the LGB scene?

DeeAnn

[Stephanie Julianna]

You went out into the real world. I found out where gurls like us met from ads in Drag Magazine and others. There were many clubs, bars and even restaurants in NYC that catered to us and that's where you made friends who then told you about venues in other towns and states. In many ways it was safer than the internet. You can tell more about a person's sincerity when you are speaking to them face to face.

[Leslie Langford]

I became aware of the existence of other crossdressers (or "transvestites" as we were called back in the day) through notices in the back of tabloids such as "Midnight" and the "National Enquirer", which sometimes also featured ads - often with head-shots - of otherwise clandestine drag bars and their featured performers.

Back in 1965 when I was a teenager and still living in Montreal, I had a summer factory job in the French-speaking part of town. One day, while on my lunch break and in a nearby convenience store to buy a snack, I accidentally noticed a Ballantine Books paperback entitled "Sex Life of a Transvestite" mixed in amongst all of the other predominately French-language books in that rack. I mean - really???...what were the odds? A touch of karma, perhaps?

Needless to say, I immediately scooped that book up, bought it, and eagerly read it from cover to cover at my first opportunity. I was still new to this whole CDing thing at the time and desperate to try to figure myself out. Although the book was a bit on the prurient side and focused more on the fetishistic aspects of crossdressing (as was the conventional wisdom in those days), it did open my eyes up to a world out there that still lived in the shadows, and which I wasn't yet familiar with. It also described in detail feelings which the protagonist had which I could readily identify with.

For the first time, I understood fully that I was not the only one like this out there.

[Rosemary+]

Thanks again ladies,
The response to my first ever post is phenomenal!
You all sure do know how to make a lady feel at home
Rosie

[Maria Strange]

Even though the Internet was widely available in 2003 when I moved in to my flat I had rarely had the time or inclination to search for cd sites. My mum had just died after a long battle with cancer and now for the first time I was alone in my own flat to do what I want. I began to get to know the neighbours. Then one day a neighbour told me that he had an alter ego called Marion and that I might see her from time to time. This threw me at first no one had openly told me before. As he walked away I took a deep breath and told him I dress too. He had been dressing for years well before the Internet. He knew people and places and venues to cross dress and so I progressed from there with little or no help from the Internet

[MichelleDevon]

Welcome to the forums Rosemary - I'm not exactly an "old hand" here - clocked my 100th posting earlier this month but the internet does enable one to find like-minded people to talk to.

Before the internet...???

The answer to both is "I didn't"

Before the internet I thought it was just me, I genuinely had no idea that this was something with such a worldwide appeal. As a measure of my naivety I came across a forum at a stockings website which was entitled "CD/TV Issues" - as I have recalled elsewhere I couldn't for the life of me understand what stockings had to do with compact discs and television!!!!! The rest, as they say, is history.

All of my "girl" friends postdate my discoveries via the web - and not a few GG friends too

BBC radio 4 though gave me a link to a support group - a short comedy series about a crossdresser which was followed up with a reference to the Beaumont Society which I subsequently checked out and joined.

Michelle
xxx

[Allison2006]

Penthouse letters (sorry) at least also brought it to my attention that I wasn't the "only girl out there"

I had started wearing pantyhose when in my early teens and added a pair of my sister's heels a couple of years later. But I really got into crossdressing after reading stories in this magazine.

I remember seeing an ad in Area Shopper before the internet age, from Erie Sisters support group. I can recall on more than one occasion seeing Ann Landers and Dear Abby answering question from crossdressers about where to find support groups. And I once posted an ad in a local newspapers personals section that had quite a few crossdressers looking to meet others. I had one CD'er contact me but lost my nerve and never did meet her.That happened just before I got a computer and internet access

[Vickie_CDTV]

In the 1960's, you could find ads in popular magazines, and even in children's comic books, for a place called "Michael Salem's TV Boutique". As a child I wondered for a while what the connection was between women's shoes or clothes and television... Later I put it together that in that context, TV meant 'transvestite', and not 'Television'.

Interesting, I never knew Michael Salem advertised in "mainstream" publications (I saw their ads in old more racy magazines), much less comic books. Do you remember which comic books they appeared in? I'd love to look that up.

[Rosemary+]

I can remember the Michael Salem adverts. Did anyone ever contact or use their products?

[threeheavenshigh]

The answer to both is "I didn't"

Before the internet I thought it was just me, I genuinely had no idea that this was something with such a worldwide appeal. As a measure of my naivety I came across a forum at a stockings website which was entitled "CD/TV Issues" - as I have recalled elsewhere I couldn't for the life of me understand what stockings had to do with compact discs and television!!!!! The rest, as they say, is history.

I think of my generation as exactly 3 years right behind the tech boom. Internet started showing up everywhere right after I graduated high school.

The effect of tech on LGBT rights cannot be understated. A good chunk of people suddenly started realizing what they might be. Not only were the ideas out there, there were pictures, people clarifying what a huge variety of orientations actually existed (not just gay or "normal"), dogmas were questioned, etc.

The idea that I could be a crossdresser was inconceivable, even though I had being guiltily indulging in it since age 10. I wasn't attracted to men, after all. Plus if I was a crossdresser, OMG I might be on the path to becoming sex criminal. Or get AIDS from masturbating.

Seriously, living before and after internet is a trip.

[flatlander_48]

The effect of tech on LGBT rights cannot be understated. A good chunk of people suddenly started realizing what they might be. Not only were the ideas out there, there were pictures, people clarifying what a huge variety of orientations actually existed (not just gay or "normal"), dogmas were questioned, etc.

The other thing that happened was that positive images of LGBT people began to circulate in the media. Images that portrayed regular folks doing regular things: going to the grocery store, doing their jobs, doing charitable works (both inside and outside of the community), being parents, etc.; all things that worked to humanize a group that most people were unfamiliar with.

DeeAnn

[Sometimes Steffi]

Penthouse letters (sorry) at least also brought it to my attention that I wasn't the "only girl out there"

I had seen a number of "letters" in Penthouse Forum, but I always thought that they were works of fiction written by staff writers.