Yup, just walk up to some poor schmuck and tell them that you easily clocked them as a guy in a dress. I'm sure that will make their day. Right. What are you smoking? I want some!
Yup, just walk up to some poor schmuck and tell them that you easily clocked them as a guy in a dress. I'm sure that will make their day. Right. What are you smoking? I want some!
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
Hi Marci, now I've been in that situation several times. I've smiled and walked in. Some were holding a dress or 2 looking frustrated then I would offer a little advice or they would ask my thoughts then we would strike up a conversation. Most of time just.smile and and gon it's safer that way.
If you want to compliment a woman on what she is wearing, that's fine. It shouldn't matter what her birth gender is, but I agree you should leave it at that. If she wants to bring up any gender questions, leave it to her. Just consider how you would feel if the tables were turned.
This happened to me once. I was in my favorite consignment shop (en femme) looking at some clothes when a guy who was picking out dresses came up to me and asked "Are you T?" I looked at him for a moment and said "Yes, would you like to go outside and talk about it?" Turns out he had just started HRT and was visiting the area, and wondered how trans people were accepted in the area.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club
Kristi
I couldn't agree more with your comments. I'm British (ok English) and although I have never watched Downton the way you express the idea of good manners is absolutely correct. It is exactly the way I was brought up. That and that a true gentleman (or lady) should be able to talk to a Duke in the same way as they would to his gamekeeper. Confidently politely and respectfully. Unfortunately these are values which are in increasingly short supply these days. Having said that, I did find people in USA rather more polite than here at home on a recent holiday. There is hope!
Thank you for bringing this up.
Julia
Wow! Thanks for all your comments. I had no idea you all would react so strongly. Guess my reaction would be to say thanks, but I can see the side now that thinks I might be outing you. Of course, I'd be very discreet, never wanting to make anyone uncomfortable. My original idea was to say hi, you look great, and maybe make a new friend. I never thought about the negative side of it. Thanks again, I've been educated.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] My GG GF Julie and I send you all hugsI'm on the right in my avatar, Julie is on the left.
I wouldn't mind you saying, "wow you look great." Then I'd thank you. I could do without the rest though.
A knowing wink and a smile would be much more discreet, and much more appreciated.
Compliments on the clothing is one thing. That's about all I can handle at the moment. As somone who is transitioning, I'm stressed enough as it is.
As a TS I know I would not appreciate it.
I wouldn't say anything. I'd keep my thoughts to myself but depending upon the the circumstances, I might give an approving nod or smile.
Di
Whenever I see a t-girl, I want to run up to them and tell them how proud they should be of themselves and tell them how much courage it must take. Instead I try to think if it was me I believe I would just like to just go on with my daily routine. And that's what I do, just leave it alone.
It strikes me as being more or less the gender equivalent of the racist comment "Wow, you speak English well [for someone who isn't white]". Not cool.
Hi Marci,
I am TS and do not pass whatsoever so I think the secret is kind of out whenever I am in public. However, I still would be very uncomfortable if someone came running up to me and said those things even if they were well meaning which was the point of your OP I believe. I kind of like to exist in my own world and just go about my business without having it pointed out for the rank and file in real time. Now I have had other women compliment my choice of clothing/style and that is fine because it is jus a compliment.
Cheers
Marcelle
Maybe this will help you.
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...dea&highlight=
the only limit that u set, is the one u set yourself.
Thanks to you all for your comments and help. If it's ok with the ops, I'd like you to close this thread.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] My GG GF Julie and I send you all hugs
I think "You look fabulous" is quite sufficient. I've made that comment a few times to people I thought were probably CDers and they positively glowed.
Just say a simple "hello" and leave it at that.
I wouldn't say anything. There is no need to react in any way. The person might be new to this and simply might not want to attract any attention. There is also the possibility that the person is not a CD. I like to mind my own business and not intrude into anyone's privacy. If you say nothing, you are not going to hurt anyone's feelings. If you say something, you might very well make that person's day or you might ruin it. Being a CD can be a sensative issue so leave the other person alone.
I was at a bar once and a gentleman approached me like that too. I did not feel put off at all. He was well dressed and nice. He explained that he dresses at home, but had not gotten the nerve to go out. After a while I was off to my next place and I invited him to join me. I had become pretty sure that he was not one of those "chasers" that on occasion approach me. We went to a club, where I am a semi regular. I think the club was not his scene, and he left. Overall I did not feel intimidated or upset at all, and he had added a little color to my evening.
Agreed. I love being called 'fabulous' by a stranger!
MM:
I try to avoid minefields. Starting a conversation like that out of the blue has a lot of potentially negative aspects to it. I wouldn't go there...
DeeAnn
A simple smile and say "Hi", that would be the end of it for me.
nothing more then I would do to anyone else that came in eye contact.
my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress
"Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"
I think a compliment is always a nice thing to hear from another, no matter who it comes from or even if you were incorrect in your assumption of being a CD or trans. If you saw me out and said it, I would say "Thank you so much!"
This subject comes up once a month at least and the responses are all over the place. My though is to leave her alone. Treat her like a woman you don't know.
What if she is not a crossdresser, but and actual woman? Suggesting that she is a crossdresser would be pretty embarrassing and insulting as well. If she is actually a crossdresser, you've just let her know that she doesn't pass and that could ruin her day. I can't see any good from saying anything crossdressing related.
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