As an androgynous person, it seemed right when that fem feeling came around. I was born that way and i am what i am.
As an androgynous person, it seemed right when that fem feeling came around. I was born that way and i am what i am.
Part Time Girl
I tried to make a posting on this but I'm not sure it got through, so I'll try again.
Being a CD is something we are born with. Some people compare it to being born with a hair color but hair color does not affect personality and can be easily changed.
Being born CD seems to be related to the way the brain is made up. Perhaps a close analogy would be being born left handed or right handed, which is also brain related. Society also seemed at one time to discriminate here too. WhenI was in grade school at least of my teachers told my mother to change me from being left handed to being right handed. It would, for one thing, allegedly have improved my poor penmenship. My mother refused. It seems that now psychologists are dead set against changing which hand one uses. We are born this way, and it is somehow linked to how our brain is formed and works.
I think being a CD is a similar kind of phenomenon, related to the makeup of the brain. Trying to change from being a CD would also seem to invite serious psychological problems, just as changing one's hand orientation would.
I am left handed by nature, and I believe I am also a CD by nature too.
I think it was a Pavlovian response. It was exciting to touch, feel, smell and wear women's underwear when I was a young teen knowing that I wanted to explore what was really in there. As part of the excitement came the reward of orgasm and therefore I learned that if I rang the bell, I would get a treat. The bell ringing became quite pleasant as it lead up to the reward. Now the reward does not come as rapidly and the process of ringing the bell - or dressing up - has in some ways become its own reward.
Last edited by Lacey New; 02-29-2016 at 08:09 AM.
Sometime during puberty I figured out that, instead of putting up with all of the social channels and dealing with the temperamental objects of desire (girls), I could secretly emulate the fantasy woman I wanted to be with. And she was exactly the way I wanted her to be. It became a wonderfully singular activity that was more exciting and scandalous than anything else. I did have the regular socially acceptable relationships but femulation is the ultimate. Now after >50 years, I know that me and she are a wonderful whole person. I would feel so empty if the CD'ing had to go away.
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
When I was younger I thought it was because I was damaged. Then as I grew up I was insistent that it was because when I was younger girls were nicer to me than boys and I wanted to be like them. Then when I hit about 18/19 I thought I was just a crossdresser. But now Im in my twenties I have realised I am trans and not just someone who likes to dress up.
While my best friends were male and I engaged in male play, I also had good friendships with girls and enjoyed their company as well. During adolescence my attraction to girls increased and I formed stronger friendships with them while at the same time I was experimenting with other guys. I admired and wanted to be with girls but wasn't having much luck, and was also interested in boys, and this led me to think that I might have had better luck with relationships if I'd been a girl. This seed germinated in my mind for several decades until the time I realized that I could play a female character in a MMORPG, and from that point on I've been expressing aspects of myself in this manner. As I've grown away from MMORPGs, I've become more interested in LGB & T issues and in sexual orientation and gender expression in general (I confess that trans porn may also have had something to do with blurring gender lines for me). As a result of these factors, I've moved away from a purely binary understanding of gender (my own included) and acknowledge that, while I am predominantly male-identified, I still have a female element to my psyche that occasionally needs to express itself, and part of the way in which that happens is that I often feel more comfortable in female clothing.
Flying saucers. Cosmic rays. Struck in the gender lobe by a meteorite.
When dressed and setting on the toilet the pee has a shorter distance to travel to hit the water !
I was born this way. The need for me to dress is way to express my feminine side. The feminine side enjoys the look and feel of women's clothes and lingerie. Why drives some little girls to want to wear pretty dresses?
Not being allowed to crossdress would be like telling an artist he can't draw or a singer he can't sing.
Getting dressed just feels right.
I did read something about the "hormone wash theory" which I'm inclined to support.
Hardest part has been trying to accept this trait. Being here amongst you has helped since no one else knows about my crossing dressing besides my wife and you all.
Tina
My theory is that I was born this way. I wanted to express myself by wearing a dress and pantyhose pre kindergarten. That was way before I was aware of men's and women's fashion limitations. My mom let me wear hose and a dress around the house when I was 4. It's funny because I don't remember asking her. One evening there was a pair of black hose on my bed. How did she know? Not a clue. But I just started wearing them like it was any normal thing. That lasted for a few months then they were suddenly gone. I asked my mom for another pair and she scolded me and said 'pantyhose are for girls'. I was devastated.
I look at it as a way to express myself just like an artist or athlete uses their gift to express themselves.
I should have been born a girl.....and hopefully someday will become one 100%....
For now, I will be dressing 24/7
I like what's cute and beautiful wether it's clothes, makes up or anything !
Boys clothes are dull and unatractive to me.
So i crossdress
I believe it is mostly biological and a bit of psychological thrown in.
My theory is that our brains are hardwired to interpret crossdressing as actual contact with a woman. When we crossdress our brain releasing a host of feel-good neurotransmitters (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, etc.) which produce the sensations of well-being, comfort, pleasure, sexual gratification, bonding, and self-identity. You can't stop your brain from releasing neurotransmitters, and if you do the same thing over and over, it eventually causes your brain to fatigue and release less dopamine, leading us to escalate our crossdressing, and take greater risks.
How does our brains get hardwired this way. Through a process called synaptogenesis. During the first three years of our lives our brains are producing neural connections at a rate of thousands per second. By the time we are three years old, we have about 5X the amount of neural connections... Then we undergo neural pruning. Through the learning process some neural connections are reinforced while others are lost. This process of synaptogenesis reoccurs again in puberty.
If we make the right connections, and reinforce them, then our brains are hardwired for crossdressing. When we crossdress we receive a rush of feel-good sensations, while the rest of the world feels nothing.
All memory formation is mediated by short- (electrical & biochemical) and long-term (gene expression, physiological change) synaptic modifications, including some degree of synaptogenesis. The synaptic pruning hypothesis that you mention may be involved in some critical developmental periods (e.g. visual development, language learning) as well as important brain modifications during adolescence/puberty, but while it may in part explain how our adult psychological makeup is eventually solidified (to whatever extent it actually is), it doesn't explain why cross-dressing (or non-standard sexual orientation or gender identity) is found in some individuals but not others. This is where we get into the nature vs nurture debate - are our brains wired differently from the start due to genetics or events in utero, or do we just happen by chance to be exposed to atypical stimulus combinations (or at critical moments) that cause us to form different associations from most people?
While it may sound like a cop-out, I believe it's a combination of both in amounts that vary from person to person: our genetic templates and early development may set up predispositions in us to develop in certain ways but those changes may or may not actually take place depending on what happens in our environment. Hope that helps!
I like the 'vanishing twin (sister?)' theory myself, kinda gross bio stuff and usually hard to prove if you were born later than the mid 80's but plausible 😉
My old high school yearbook had a picture of me surrounded by several girls while playing my guitar. Must have been struck by a lot of estrogen. That's my story and I'm sticking by it. LOL
Part Time Girl
More to it than just crossdressing for me. I enjoy being a girl. The whole package is part of it all to me. Housework, laundry, and just being treated like the girl that is me. Sure I pluck my brows, shave my legs and working on the body hair removal as well. Looking and being a girl is so nice. Silk stocking, heels and pretty dresses work for me, and my love prefers me in a dress anyway. Sometimes it is scarey, but hey if your gonna put on a pair of heels with a prissy dress then you may as well deal with what comes with it. Family knows, but they still love me and have actually stated I am so much happier these days also. If your gonna put on the heels then be a lady.
I have many theory's most likely none are accurate. But here is my fav.
I am artistic person , with a codepenancy tword addiction. cross dressing allows me to artistically feed my addictive nature. With out turning to drugs alcohol or gambling.
Theory 2 , I just like to feel pretty damn it
I now think that it was my way of dealing with long term molestation. Being used as a girl I just started to want to be the girl and if I was a girl the conflict that I was having as a boy wouldnt hurt soooo much. So I stole some clothing from a washing line and tried it on no more conflict.(till I hit puberty)
i was born this way and as i age the compulsion becomes stronger and more intense
Sarah, I have no idea why, I just wanted to dress in lovely skirts/tops and stockings attached to the Garters of my pretty pastel pantygirdle. and be pretty like a Girl. I started when I was 5--I remember watching the Susan Show, then going into my mothers lingerie drawer, taking out and trying on a Very Lacy half slip
because it's the clothing of my gender id
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.
thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er
Always infatuated with how women look and presented themselves. Then I would see sci fi shows where sometimes a man would be disguised as a woman and I thought it so mesmerizing. The clothing and the power women have is truly amazing.
X's and Y's got crossed-up somehow, but that's the breaks.
Just what it is.
Never had so much fun dressing.
Nice photo of you, by the way.