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Thread: What's your favourite theory on why you crossdress?

  1. #26
    Member Kellitgdet's Avatar
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    Ok I'm with Chelsea,
    Femulate is my new favorite word.
    I discovered my desire to cross dress when I was around 7 years old. On a family camping trip. We were all going to go swimming and I didn't have a swimsuit so I wore our friends, very pretty daughters, bikini bottom. It woke up something inside me. Have been dressing ever since.

  2. #27
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    The theory that I think is the best is: all fetuses start out as female and over time changes occur to those with XY chromosomes, sometimes these changes to the brain do not
    happen in ways that are most common to a male fetus. Thus, the brain is a little different than the majority of males and responds differently to certain stimuli such as wearing women's clothes and other things usually more common to females.

    In other words "I was born this way"!
    Hugs, Carole

  3. #28
    Bad Influence mechamoose's Avatar
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    Gravity waves. They keep pulling me back to those skirts and pretty shoes
    - Madame Moose - on my way to Anne
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    "I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor
    "If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And when I am for myself, what am 'I'? And if not now, when?" - Hillel the Elder

  4. #29
    Silver Member franlee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NicoleScott View Post
    Have they found that crossdressing gene yet? Until then, no.
    My theory, an event in early childhood from which I experienced pleasure. The event could have been something I saw, touched, heard, etc., such as seeing and hearing high heels, touching a fabric, or watching a lipstick application.
    When I learned I could incorporate this with sexual activity I was hooked.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Fran
    It's worth something just being around to Fuss!

  5. #30
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    Hi Sarah, I really don't have a theory, It's just who I an & it's just what I do.

    I have been in this program for over 69yrs. now and just loving life. ~~......
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  6. #31
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    I don't have a theory that can be proven - that's the problem. My sister's clothes were easily accessible for one thing. For some reason I wanted to try on some silky panties at a very young age and at puberty I had a compulsion to try on a dress.

    If I were brought up in a different environment (no female clothing in my home) maybe I wouldn't have ever tried on those first garments. Like I said, there's no way to prove it so it's only a hypothesis. I've pondered other possibilities - Maybe genetics?
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  7. #32
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    It makes me feel more normal in relation to how I feel internally.

  8. #33
    My name is Carol Julogden's Avatar
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    I'm on the right track, baby, I was born this way.
    My name is Carol.

  9. #34
    Here and Cute! newandshy's Avatar
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    My theory is my childhood. I had an older sister and she would dress me up in her old clothes sometimes. Eventually she would wear a more guyish style of clothes that were still womans and she would give those to me as hand me downs. There were also some old pajama night shirts she gave me and I loved them, I loved how long they were and how they would reach all the way to my feet, but it had the Tasmanian devil on it so it wasn't girly! Then one day she asked me to fix her computer while she was at her dads house all day. She said if I do, I can sleep in her bed and wear any of her clothes I wanted, which was strange because at the time, I don't think I was even sneaking them out of her closet. That pretty much sealed it.

    My theory has always been, that something happens to you when you are just starting puberty that associates female clothes with feeling good, or pleasure. Not saying it is that for everyone but since mine started out very much as a sexual thing I'm pretty sure that had an impact on me.

  10. #35
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    I absolutely believe that some developing brain cell without the maturity to reason got the wrong notion when I was three or four years old, and it was imprinted permanently in my brain.

  11. #36
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    Sarah,
    I don't have a favorite theory I'm just looking for one that helps me understand it more clearly !
    The problem is one comes along and then everyone jumps on it saying how much they got it wrong !
    I guess I have to accept I was born like it and will live the rest of my life with it, so I must try and make the most of it and enjoy it !

  12. #37
    Aspiring Member aprilgirl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by carhill2mn View Post
    The theory that I think is the best is: all fetuses start out as female and over time changes occur to those with XY chromosomes, sometimes these changes to the brain do not
    happen in ways that are most common to a male fetus. Thus, the brain is a little different than the majority of males and responds differently to certain stimuli such as wearing women's clothes and other things usually more common to females.

    In other words "I was born this way"!
    I'm going with what Carole shared.

  13. #38
    Silver Member Tina_gm's Avatar
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    My theory is simply that I was born with enough internal femininity that I desire to dress how I feel.

  14. #39
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarah7391 View Post
    None of us really know why some males become crossdressers.
    Well, SOME of us do. this is deja vu. Briefly:

    Someone started dressing me up in his sister's clothing and molesting me, planting the idea in my head that I was really supposed to be a girl. That would go on sometimes every day for weeks at a time. Lasted until I was almost 14. So yeah, I was crossdressing a lot as a kid. By the time I hit high school, I thought I was gay, transsexual, I was really confused. I had attached dressing and behaving as a girl with the only source of affection I had. Sort of like Pavlov's dogs, I think the urge to dress up is simply connected to expecting affection; but now I do it whether the reward comes, or not. Apparently when something is drilled into you during certain periods of development, maybe you can't change it (best example is language accent; if you learn a new language before puberty, you won't have an accent; that language part of our brains sort of 'finalizes' during that period of sexual development). That would explain a lot of things.

    If you want to read the whole sordid tale, click on the link in my signature below, you'll find a comprehensive progression of what went on in the life of a little boy and all the influences steering him into regular crossdressing, and how the conditioning worked. You'll discover how you can take a normal boy and turn him into a crossdresser. As an adult, working with psychiatric patients, I discovered many who had blocked out of memory many things that happened to them. I have no idea why I remember it all in such detail.

    My own belief is that due to society's tremendous stigma associated with males embracing ANYTHING feminine, most people can't even begin to think deeply about this; and so, just prefer to chalk it up to genetics or being born this way. And yet, this does not explain why so many don't crossdress through their early years. If there is some latent genetic connection, what is the trigger that inspires the sudden interest in girl clothes? It's almost certain that there is one; you never hear of anyone out drilling for oil, and suddenly racing off to a prom gown shop. There's always proximity to the clothes, and almost always the clothes of someone we know. There is a link. Somewhere. But until we can accept that we 'let it happen', (and many still cannot, because to do so would be to accept that we take responsibility for it, and that is in most cases unacceptable to the psyche of the person involved), that link will never be found.

    JMHO. YMMV. It's just food for thought.
    Last edited by sometimes_miss; 02-28-2016 at 09:43 AM.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  15. #40
    Senior Member Abbey11's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by carhill2mn View Post
    The theory that I think is the best is: all fetuses start out as female and over time changes occur to those with XY chromosomes, sometimes these changes to the brain do not
    happen in ways that are most common to a male fetus. Thus, the brain is a little different than the majority of males and responds differently to certain stimuli such as wearing women's clothes and other things usually more common to females.

    In other words "I was born this way"!
    I'm with Carole and April.

    Carole, I tried to word what you have said for another thread a while back but gave up as couldn't word it correctly, you nailed it !
    OMG!! Owning my femininity .... and I LOVE it!

  16. #41
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
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    My big sister had prettier clothes than my big brother, so I loved playing in her closet not his.
    Magic is the art of changing consciousness at will.

  17. #42
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    I suppose the clothes were within reach when I first began (wearing my mum's clothing at the earliest onset of puberty). Just wearing said outfit already created an association between the clothes and a number of other connotations - beauty, sensuality, femininity, perhaps even prohibition. When I moved on to evening gowns and eventually a ball gown, these feelings heightened. At the time, it was indescribable, and I continued draping myself in those wondrous dresses before I got caught by the traces I left.

    I only began presenting as a woman out of my own volition only not-so-recently. I never thought I was cute/pretty/whatever at that point in time, but I was at least in my own skin while looking somewhat like a girl. Guess feeling natural, "meant to be" even, is part of it, even though I currently have no interest in transitioning. Of course I still like to feel pretty and dress the part, though that seems secondary to me even though it's significant.

  18. #43
    Kiwi Fem NZ_Dawn's Avatar
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    Nature...NOT Nurture

  19. #44
    Member rachelatshop's Avatar
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    I think that sometimes my X chromosome is bigger than the Y chromosome, otherwise it is all about the way female cloths feel, softer, satiny,and slinky, GOOD.

  20. #45
    Junior Member LacieMarie's Avatar
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    I believe it's a DNA thing. I believe I have a stronger feminine side than a male side along with the fascination of the female body makes me have the desire to have one

  21. #46
    Aspiring Member Yinlingyen's Avatar
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    I very much enjoy the feeling of being feminine. I delicate gestures and mannerism.
    The body movements and outlook of a girl is so attractive.
    I also enjoy the feeling of delicate feminine fabrics on my skin. The soft touch of silk lace. The flowing light dresses.
    Being able to bare a shoulder and leg means everything to me.
    The feeling of a pair of strappy sandals on my feet is wonderful, especially if I have had a nice pedicure and painted.
    The whole process of dressing up is also very erotic to me.
    I love putting on make up and attaching false eyelashes and nail extensions.
    When I walk out I feel vulnerable and that is part of the excitement. I guess I am really a submissive at heart too.
    I like to be dominated and being dressed in flimsy dainty dresses and high heel sandals adds to this submissiveness.

  22. #47
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    I would have to say that I do it because i can , it isnt something i have to do but just want to, and when I do girls love it and I get lots of attention... Guess that sums it up for me , Hugs Gabriella

  23. #48
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    Who relays knows but I remember as I was growing up my parents would have a big couples get together about one a month and back in the 60"s it involved allot of drinking
    I remember the women in they're 40's always wearing dresses, smelling delicious, and in full makeup made me crazy! and they would hug me and say I was so cute.
    You've got to admit women are so pleasurable. OMG I think I wanted to emulate them to have that feeling they gave me.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  24. #49
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    Exploration, plain and simple.
    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

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  25. #50
    Aspiring Member ShelbyDawn's Avatar
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    I don't believe gender is a binary. I believe we all fit somewhere on a standard deviation curve with varying degrees of 'masculine' and 'feminine' gender bias - all of them totally and completely normal in their now light.
    For some there is a strong correlation between gender and birth sex; for others, not so much.
    I do not have a strong match between my birth sex and my gender, so in order to express my particular blend of 'masculine' and 'feminine', I wear clothes that do not match my physical sex, e.g., I crossdress.
    My earliest memories of wearing female clothes go back to the age of about five; far too early for sexuality to come into play. This leads me to believe that I was born with my particular predisposition to crossdress as I described above.

    I also think it interesting that, during a recent therapy session, I experienced a past life regression. While I am not 100% sure I believe I actually experienced a past life(hey, why not), What I experienced was me as a little girl about five or six in a very loving home environment. The feeling of complete and utter joy was overwhelming. Perhaps that really was me in a previous life and I crossdress in my current life to regain some of that joy.

    Whatever the reason, I do not believe that nurture or environment had anything to do with my crossdressing, I was born this way.
    I am Me and Me is OK!



    Shelby

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