I recently attended a week long group-cruise with about 1100 geeky people. The past 3 years I had gone on the same cruise en femme, and people there came to know me as Rachel. However, partially out of laziness and partially because I stopped caring, I introduced myself as Jon. I was still wearing all female clothing and makeup. Some people even pulled me quietly aside and asked what pronouns and name to use, to which I replied that whatever they used would be fine. Some people still called me Rachel, out of habit, and some used Jon. Luckily my brain has learned to hear both names. This understanding of the trans community within the group is one reason I felt safe not needing to pass as Rachel.

It was very freeing to just be myself. I explained to those who asked that 95% of my life is spent dressed in male attire, that I had no intention on transitioning (we have several in the group who are), but that I enjoy women's clothing better. I even went without forms when the dress didn't need them (several of the dresses I took were shaped in a way that didn't quite work without forms, but most of them luckily worked fine with or without). I even let my face get a bit shadowy, mostly because shaving close enough to pass multiple times a day for 10 days is very taxing on the skin. I would give it a good shave right before formal occasions, because I knew photos were likely to be taken.

My favorite moment was when Wil Wheaton (yes, of Star Trek fame), came up to me out of the blue and said that he loved the ball gown I had worn the previous evening and that I looked gorgeous. I was so in shock that I honestly don't know how I responded, though I bet I flashed a huge smile and thanked him. Another good memory was when I went out on the dance floor as John Flansburgh (of They Might Be Giants) DJ'ed and was asked to be twirled. I had had several drinks by that point, was in a huge ball gown (the one Wil liked) and heels; she took my hand, I twirled her once and then she twirled me, and gosh darn it, I didn't even fall down!

Ended up burning while laying in a string bikini on the beach, and have the tan lines to prove it. I can't wait til next year!