Traumatized

[Rhonda Darling]

Not to sidetrack, but Rachelatshop, could you please finish the story of the young man. How did it work out for him? Im sue you didnt intend to leave a cliff hanger.

Maria, this would be the time to convince your wife that the wig and makeup would complete you and you'd be much less likely to deaw undue attention. At the least, have them along with you so you can present a femme hairline if need be. When people do look at you, their mind locks onto percieved incongruities. If all looks "normal" in their world view, thwy likely wont focus on the specific (you).

[Krisi]

1) You were in a strange town among strangers. Nobody knew you or your wife so it doesn't matter if they saw you or what they think.

2) If you go out dressed as a woman with your wife, ask her to drive. After all. it's two women in the car, one has to drive. If there are any issues, she is the one whose license matches her appearance.

3) Going out half dressed guarantees that anyone who sees you will identify you as a crossdresser. Dress completely and they won't know for sure.

4) Trying to hide or cover up just draws attention to yourself. Stay calm no matter what.

[Di]

Very sorry you felt like this
But you were doing nothing wrong and prob the panic made things feel worse.
If you want to go out in the future please do not let this ruin it for you.
Or if you want to stay home... That's good too.
Just be YOU that's the important thing and I love the relationship you and your wife have!

[Paula_56]

It dawned on me one day and I wrote this statement a manifesto of self acceptance: I am 50 years old. I am hard working and have a successful career. I am financially successful, I am a dedicated husband and father. I give back to my community and I am active in my church. I strive to be caring, kind, and thoughtful. I don’t drink or abuse drugs. I am honest and trustworthy. This is a part of my personality that has caused me shame and anxiety for years. There are medical and biological reasons for this. It doesn’t make me an awful person, it means I’m different. I won’t feel bad about myself anymore.
I am continually amazed at the experiences I have while out in the world as a woman.
When I started going out into the world as a woman I was happy not to scare small children and animals. I travel all over the U.S. for business and use this time to go out and about in the world. I dress in business clothes and appear slightly better dressed then most women. I feel it’s important to blend in and not stick out and to dress age appropriate. I never thought that I could go to malls, get makeovers at MAC, visit the doctor, dine out, and enjoy museums. Over the years I’ve lost weight, improved my wardrobe, and developed my makeup skills. Today I am happy with my presentation as a woman. But even in my early days I’ve never had a problem with the public.
Self acceptance is the big hurdle. I went out a few times back in the 90’s and always felt like I was doing something wrong. Today I truly don’t care if I am read. I feel like a woman when I am out and about. The confidence builds, and helps you become more accustom to your role as a woman in public. What happens next is a slow evolution into womanhood the more you go out as a woman the more you want to go out as woman. With this your presentation improves.

[ReineD]

I'm so sorry you put yourself through this. Please know that no one would have noticed, they were all too busy with their own affairs walking towards the parade. And if someone had noticed, what is the worst they could have done, cry out, "Look, there's a man wearing a cami and skirt in that car"? This would have been such a childish thing to do, considering that most people wouldn't care especially if you're in your own private property. So your worst case scenario would have been a stare or two, but this happens to the best of us even with full makeup, wig, etc.

But just think of it: how much attention to you pay to what people are wearing when they are in cars waiting at a traffic light. Still for your own peace of mind, just throw a roomy guy shirt in the back seat next time you're out driving that you can quickly put on over the camisole.

[Aligirl]

So sorry you had a rough experience! Most people aren't paying attention to other people in their cars. The first time I went out driving as Allie during the day I had butterflies in my stomach I was so nervous! I quickly realized most people are too involved on their cell phones to notice other people around them. Glad you had your SO with you to help! Make sure you tell her how much you appreciate her help!

[MsVal]

I'm going to go off in another direction ("So what else is new Val?")

That experience was actually very positive. You were out in public and nothing bad happened. With the exception of intent, it's exactly the same story as the one who finally gets up the courage to buy a bag of chips in out of town convenience store. If/when you feel inclined to go out again, you will remember how you were needlessly anxious. You will be more comfortable, and in a better state of mind to enjoy the experience.

Best wishes
MsVal

[1263kimberly]

I know how you feel I was nervous the first time I went out that was a month ago but when I there at legends in Raleigh NC dress up for the first time l had good time going by myself but I would like to have a friend to go with that like crossdressing to