Single CD vs Married Non-CD

[ADANY]

Hi girls - so I thought it would be interesting to identify some fun advantages of being a single CD vs Married Non-CD.

I was reading this forum and noted how many girls here are saying that they would love to find a nice GG. Well, is it better to be a single CD vs married non-CD (boring)?

I figured that we can come up with some fun ideas listing advantages of being a single -CD. I'll go first !!!

1) you have clothes In many colors shapes and designs (not only black/brown).

2) you can look at heels and judge if they are comfortable to wear or not (you may not care as long as long as they are sexy).

3) you can talk to girlfriends about fashion and find the subject very interesting


Omg- there is so much more but I figured I would ask all to join

[Teresa]

Adany,
You can still do your list married as far is 3 is concerned I may not chat to my wife about fashion but there's plenty I do chat with.

The merits of being married or single aren't all frivolous , some CDers prefer a married partner if they're OK with their dressing ! I'm in the other group where a wife and dressing aren't so compatible but I still have fun and enjoy it now I've come to terms with it.

[josrphine]

O K ADANY, I am a married C D that was the same size in cloths an shoes. [ 1 ] I have two set of womens clothing to pick from an when we go shopping we pick out different things that we like an some so we can go out as sisters. [2 [ heels my wife said to me as a young women they were fun but not now, do you know how much money that saved me. I do have low heels . [ 3 ] Right an I have so many more of them because my wife loves to show me off an I love the talks I have with all thee women. One even ask my wife if she could rent me, she said just for shopping. YUK YUK YUK beat that as to being single. Oh an I am now wearing skirts an dress's a size smaller then her. Jo

[reb.femme]

I'm not going to join the merry line up of married CDs coming to pick on you.

Enjoy your colours. You sound young, so live it to the max while you can. I've got loads of colours from yellow to pink. woo hoo!

Becky

[Ressie]

To me non-CD would mean not being a crossdresser at all - someone that never had an interest in wearing women's clothing. I'm a divorced CD and would not marry someone that would prevent me from crossdressing at this point in my life. I haven't had the experience of being married to an accepting woman so far.

I love being single with a closet full of wonderful things to wear, but it can get lonely sometimes.

[Suzy Parker]

Married and closeted CD so for me losing the guilt of hiding it from my spouse would be huge. Plus having both closets would be nice. One for boring man things and the other for all the fun stuff.

[Mykaa]

Me Im single and have been so for quite awhile, I do miss a womans company from time to time. I do what I want when I want, outside of working of course, I sleep in whatever I choose, I have 14 chemises cobalt blue/ black & White polka dot black satin, blue, cobalt being a bright, purple and I do have a thing for silver, oh and I have an orange 1. I also have satin sheets. Most of my clothes are dark color, I have gray also, some purple button down blouses, silver , grey and black and a navy blue with silver stripes, I love black satin....
High heel boots of a a few different types, mostly single sole stiletto, I have pumps also, I used to have purple stiletto boots, I wish I still did... I do own 1 pair stiletto boots in caramel, most of my heels are 4.5 inches some are 4 1/4. I have western boots, chestnut brown, caramel and black.
Ive found since joining here I want to be more open, Id like to talk fashion more, Id like to meet people of like mind. I have hopes of finding a woman who will accept me. I know since being here Im guilt free now, no more bad feelings about me cding. Im truly happy for the 1st time in years, I dress to some degree daily now and I love it.
I too have a lot of things to say Adany and btw, nice to meet you.

[SabrinaEmily]

Well, is it better to be a single CD vs married non-CD (boring)?

No one has that choice.

[ReineD]

Adany, is your premise that once single CDs get married, they become non-CDs? Did I read you correctly?

Because this was not the case with my SO. She grew wings and flew after we got together. When he was single, the crossdressing was only occasional and the clothing fit into just one closet. My SO was very rarely going out in public, was not shaving her body, did not have pierced ears, did not have long fingernails. Now she has all those things, we go out all over and there are lots more clothes!

[ADANY]

Sorry girls - I did not explain the premise of my initial message too well.

I also did not offer my background so, I can see how my intentions have been misunderstood.

Below is a little bit about me and what I wanted from this thread (sorry for a long message)

I am in a very good relationship with a wonderful SO. I told her about my "hobby" before we got serious. She had the same questions as many of you have identified before - basically "what does it mean?"

My approach was to tell her how I always felt - since I was 12. How I discovered my mother's clothes and how I felt trying it on. How, despite throwing out all and trying to be "normal," I eventually accepted that this is me and that I am normal. Etc. she listened and was very open to it. She wanted to see my fem-side (pics first and then the full outfit).

She was amazed with my transformation and got really excited when I asked her for some makeup tips. Since those early days, she has been applying my makeup (she is very good at it and she likes it), we have been shopping together, she bought me outfits wigs breast-forms stockings etc, we have been to a club together all dolled up.

I have been careful not to push it too much. I don't think I am. Often she initiates things. For example: her saying "let's have a dress-up and cocktails evening today," or " let's go out." Although I previously dated girls that were open to me CD, she is the first one that took me out. Actually it was her idea. Simetimes we share the same clothes - especially if she has a stretchy ones. One time (early in our relationship) she dressed me up in one of her full dress. After trying a new wig she just got, makeup and all extras, she started to jump up and down saying how I am passable and look good and and how we should go out. Next thing I know I'm at a club with her, standing out all cute in heels etc. Ended up dancing all night.

Anyways (sorry for TMI), what I wanted was to list fun things about being a CD that straight non-CD man cannot relate to. I wanted to show all that being a single CD has many advantages that straight non-CD man cannot relate to.

Basically how we all girls are wonderful and sgould not feel down. We were all single at some point.
Sorry for a long post

[PattyT]

Judging from the postings, unless you're very lucky it seems a little easier being a single CD. I'm a pretty independant type and have never married, although have come close at times.
Certainly as a single CD you can dress when you want and go wherever you like. Needless to say you can buy what you like and decide how much you're going to spend.
Answering this questions depends a lot on the personality of the person answering.
Again, this is just a personal opinion but if you ask for my vote, in general I wouuld say it is better to be a non married CD.

[Alice Torn]

Lifetime bachelor, almost came close to marriage once, 1978. i can see the OP point. The only GGs I have dated, were absolutely against a man wearing womens things, and if i married one of them, i would have to become non CD.

[Adriana Moretti]

I guess it depends on the person...some people like to be married.
I for one have no intrest in ever getting married, ever ever , ever. I love being single. I have freedom, freedom to go where I want, when I want , and not have to ask permission. I can sleep with whoever I want, no obligations, I also spend my money on ME !!! YAY !!!...How selfish right ?? Thats ok...I dont mind..

I will date a gg, a man, or another cd...one thing i would never do is marry any of them..ok..maybe if they were rich....like..rich RICH never work a day again rich...LOL.....

[Jaylyn]

My wife is my soul mate and she fully accepts me as a CD. I love her and realize that she married a man when we were married she knew I enjoyed dressing sometimes. She has always been supportive and has actually bough things for me that she thinks would make me more feminine. She says she realizes that I'm easier to get along with when I've had a few sessions of CD ing. We have occasionally dressed together in two identical sexy outfits and she has no problem making love when we are both dressed. We did agree that with the rural town we live in that I would not go out dressed so other than the house, back porch, some places on the farm or underdressing in public I am I guess considered an at home CD'er.
The dressing has made me a better person and I am much more tolerant of other people than I was pretending to be a non dresser in my early years in high school and college. I tried quitting when we were raising kids and found myself again after they all were raised. My wife and I can and have done all three of your numbers, with the exception her girl friends don't know I'm a CD but think I have a sense of fashion and support my wife in keeping her in style. Little do they know we have several matching in style outfits.
I think I found my advantage to being a married in my wife and it's really not boring having the best of both worlds with the limits we set and agree on.

[Ressie]

The only CDs that can really make this comparison are the late bloomers that got married before becoming crossdressers. Most of us were introduced to wearing women's clothing at a young age and will be CDs for life.

[Hell on Heels]

Hell-o ADANY,
How about all the things we know about applying makeup, there are a couple
of you tube videos of guys applying makeup for the first time that are quite funny.

And Adriana, I believe the quote is Never, never, never.....
https://video.search.yahoo.com/video...hrmob-818&tt=b
Much Love,
Kristyn

[Jenniferathome]

.... Well, is it better to be a single CD vs married non-CD (boring)?...

I am having great difficulty understanding this comparison. You are asking if it is better to be a single cross dresser as opposed to a married person who does not cross dress?

Why not compare being a fireman to the color blue? It make zero sense!

[ReineD]

Adany, thanks for your explanation, but what I think is missing is the fact that non-CDers don't want to do the things that CDers enjoy doing, like wearing feminine clothing and talking about heels and fashion. These things are distasteful to non-CDers, and so they wouldn't miss not doing them.

But, I'm glad that you enjoy all of this and you're having fun!

[ADANY]

Interesting perspective Ressie

[SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

Good point Reine - I guess I was trying to give some examples of how being a CD can be more fun than a straight guy (at least from our point of view).

I guess the message did not come across as well as I hoped. Reading it again, I can see how my note was confusing.

[docrobbysherry]

Your post is difficult to answer because its like asking would u rather be a CD or prima ballarina?

I was married before I ever had a thot about CDing. I began dressing after we separated. When I was married I had a very full life. But, I did lots of things that have now been replaced by Sherry,s activities. I enjoyed my life then and never thot of it as boring. But then I always keep changing my activities when something new attracts my attention.
;
Many marriages fail because couplds fall into negative patterns or get bored with their partner. U sound way too young to understand that yet. But, u will!

[ReineD]

Good point Reine - I guess I was trying to give some examples of how being a CD can be more fun than a straight guy (at least from our point of view).

Right, it is more fun from your point of view, there's no doubt about this! It's just not a point of view that is shared by non-CDers.

[ADANY]

Yep - too bad. The world would be a better place - or at least more pink.

[elliemoss]

Although I've never been married I was in a serious relationship for 6 years that was practically a marriage. It was from my early to mid twenties a time when I was still figuring out the whole CD thing. I just repressed the urges and carried on like a normal committed boyfriend (I would dress up once in a Blue Moon if I had a free house). The relationship ended a couple of years ago and I've embraced my femme side full on and have been dating the odd girl here and there but nothing serious.

Weighing both experiences up I have to go with being single and CD'ing. Although it get's lonely sometimes life is just way less stressful and more exciting. I love having the liberty to be spontaneous and never having to check with someone else before doing anything. I do intend to settle down with a beautiful lady (I'm almost 30) but what I have learned is the CD'ing side of me would be an absolute deal breaker for a relationship. Not being full time femme just every few weeks having someone who I deeply love and can share those times with is the ultimate relationship goal for me and even though it may be very very tough to find someone I have set it as my target. I've come to fully accept and embrace my femme side and desires and would never dream of going back into the closet life would be just way too boring.

[heatherdress]

ADANY - Are we comparing advantages of -

Single CDs vs married non-CDs
or
Married CDs vs non-CDs
or
Single CDs vs straight non-CDs
or
CDs vs straight guys
or
Pink world vs non-pink world?

[ADANY]

Heathersress- Whatever this question means to you I guess - some interesting comments so far as the discussion evolved.

Based on some comments - if we were to choose - Would you rather be single, but able to dress and be accepted by your friends and family or be in a married relationship but unable to express your fem side? And why?

I thought about it myself - of course we all want to find a happy medium.

For me, I think that I would rather be single and CD. But this changes depending on where I am in life - for example I would not be able to keep my job (so there is the security issue there)

On the other hand - think about all those outfits that I would try lol.