Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 26 to 42 of 42

Thread: would you talk to your gf's gay cousin about your "hobbie?"

  1. #26
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    France, Villessot near St Christophe
    Posts
    2,753
    Regarding some of the threads here I have avery good friend who is TG m>f and who is also lesbian as well and she was the first person I told because I could not hold back my secret any longer, as regards gay people not understanding/accepting us my friend has become an even closer friend as has her partner. It takes all sorts and as regards telling a gay cousin I see no problem here at all. You may find a greater degree of understanding, After all we are what we are but as someone once said "we just wired a bit different".

  2. #27
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Central NY
    Posts
    3,655
    The gay cousin probably does not know much about support for trans people. Google will probably be able to point you to any trans support available in your area.

    As for the girlfriend, well, as this site proves, you fail to tell her at your own peril.

  3. #28
    Reality Check
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    8,842
    Quote Originally Posted by SabrinaEmily View Post
    ...............Sure, I'd talk to my girlfriend's gay cousin about being trans, but I'd talk to my girlfriend about it first. .
    There is a world of difference between crossdressing and being "trans". A world of difference.

  4. #29
    its important mykell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    jer-sea shore
    Posts
    4,097
    hi ashley, you really dont need too talk to him, but that decision is ultimately up to you,
    http://www.pflagla.org/home2.html
    http://www.lgbt.ucla.edu/transresources.html
    i can recommend p-flag as i attend a group here, i feel comfortable and go dressed female or male,
    they have a transgender group which i attend and IS inclusive of CDers, they are part of the umbrella definition,
    some dont seem to understand that we are the T of LGBT
    Last edited by mykell; 04-05-2016 at 08:05 AM. Reason: clarify
    ....Mykell
    i dressed like a girl and i liked it! crossdressing...theirs an app for that

  5. #30
    Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    119
    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    There is a world of difference between crossdressing and being "trans". A world of difference.
    They're points along a spectrum. There is not "a world of difference", not even if you had said it three times and clicked your heels together.

    At any given time, some people who identify tentatively as "crossdressers" and even some who are sure they are just crossdressers, it's just a hobby, will never transition, etc., will end up transitioning. Others don't transition, but come to different identities that fit under the trans umbrella. Others don't, in part because they hide in the back of their closet, possibly somewhere in Narnia, and try to hide it even from themselves, let alone their romantic partners, let alone the world. Some people just want to wear the clothes culturally associated with the other sex, and crossdress because they perceive it as less socially unacceptable than openly wearing what they want. And I know I haven't covered everyone here.

    I see a world, but not of difference.

    And to bring this back on topic, I can't imagine there's anything in the differences you see between crossdressing and being trans that justifies telling your girlfriend's gay cousin before your girlfriend.
    Quote Originally Posted by MissDanielle View Post
    If there's one thing I hate more than anything in the world: it's living a lie. And clowns.

  6. #31
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    106
    if i have somthing to hide from my gf her gay cousin would be the last person i would share it with no matter how nice he/she maybe because one thing that gay people can't keep is a secret
    Last edited by Lorileah; 04-05-2016 at 12:45 PM. Reason: no need to quote OP

  7. #32
    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    Posts
    3,753
    Rah, where do you get this crap? I'm offended, as are millions of other gay people who can keep a secret. Do you lie in bed thinking this stuff up?
    Last edited by Lorileah; 04-05-2016 at 12:48 PM. Reason: might be offensive

  8. #33
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    106
    BAHGOD! i wish you had a little bit of sense of humor, jeez why are you always butt hurt!!
    Last edited by Lorileah; 04-05-2016 at 12:46 PM. Reason: no need to quote post above yours

  9. #34
    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    Posts
    3,753
    This is only the second time I've replied to one of your posts. The first time you were spewing such vile uninformed nonsense, that this time I didn't recognize the roll on the floor humor.
    Last edited by I Am Paula; 04-05-2016 at 12:25 PM.

  10. #35
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    11,799
    Back off you two, take it to PM.
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
    Chief Joseph
    Nez Perce



    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  11. #36
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Cathedral City, CA
    Posts
    4,638
    al:

    The short answer is: NO

    The long answer is it doesn't really have anything to do with trustworthiness. The problem is that in spite of how people may be serious about keeping your confidence, mistakes happen and your story can get out. In that situation, you have lost control of the narrative and you won't get it back. Once your story becomes public, there is no telling how it will get passed along or what will be said. You're at the mercy of the events as they unfold and the people who are a part of the events.

    So, if you're going to tell someone, be prepared for stuff to blow up. Not saying that will happen, but it is ALWAYS a possibility.

    Further, would you want your girlfriend to hear your story from You or the Grapevine?

    DeeAnn

  12. #37
    Reality Check
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    8,842
    Quote Originally Posted by SabrinaEmily View Post
    They're points along a spectrum. There is not "a world of difference", not even if you had said it three times and clicked your heels together.

    At any given time, some people who identify tentatively as "crossdressers" and even some who are sure they are just crossdressers, it's just a hobby, will never transition, etc., will end up transitioning. Others don't transition, but come to different identities that fit under the trans umbrella. Others don't, in part because they hide in the back of their closet, possibly somewhere in Narnia, and try to hide it even from themselves, let alone their romantic partners, let alone the world. Some people just want to wear the clothes culturally associated with the other sex, and crossdress because they perceive it as less socially unacceptable than openly wearing what they want. And I know I haven't covered everyone here.

    I see a world, but not of difference..
    You are entitled to your opinion of course, but you are wrong. Many, perhaps most crossdressers are just that, crossdressers. Men who enjoy dressing as women from time to time. Some just do the panties or bra, some go all out, but they (we) are simply crossdressers, nothing more.

  13. #38
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Boston Area
    Posts
    4,099
    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    Many, perhaps most crossdressers are just that, crossdressers. Men who enjoy dressing as women from time to time.
    Um... sure. Are you making a pitch that men who are "just" crossdressers aren't on the transgender spectrum? Despite the fact that they're engaging in a behavior that cis-gender males find completely baffling? Or are you saying that, yes, they're transgender but just crossdressers and not just "unripened" transsexuals? The latter stance makes perfect sense to me, the former leaves me scratching my head.

  14. #39
    Reality Check
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Posts
    8,842
    I'm saying that they like to wear women's clothes from time to time. That makes them crossdressers, nothing more. That's about as simple as I can state it.

    Sometimes, things are just as they seem, nothing more.

  15. #40
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    The South
    Posts
    1,679
    Some gays are quite accepting of cross dressers. Others not so much. I am guessing that you would really like to confide in someone and believe that this person to be a trustworthy confidante. However just because he is gay does not mean he is a good person in which to confide. You need to think it through carefully and find other reasons to believe he is a good choice.

    As for strange comments about gays not being able to keep a secret I can only say; where the heck did that come from?

  16. #41
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Boston Area
    Posts
    4,099
    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    I'm saying that they like to wear women's clothes from time to time. That makes them crossdressers, nothing more.
    So, just your absolute, regular, cis-gender guy who happens to own a wig, breast forms, hip pads, a few dresses and supporting garments and likes to wear them from time to time, maybe put on some makeup and go out to another town sometimes. Not much different than taking up golf or fly fishing, really. Nope, you explained it perfectly. My bad.

  17. #42
    eyah! Mink's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    PORTLAND eyah!
    Posts
    741
    Quote Originally Posted by gina shiney View Post
    My personal experance is that the gay community is not very accepting in this
    Gina
    yeah well we're here

    and it's clear

    THEY'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GET USED TO IT!

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State