Voice Development

[Martha G]

I tend to have an almost woman like sounding voice.

I have been perceived as a woman on the telephone many time.

Also when a person is not looking directly at me, they sometimes call me Miss or M'am.

Do any of you girls have this "problem"?

I have been trying to feminize my voice more to make it more womanly.

This is a definite plus when I am dressed.

[ClosetED]

I have the opposite problem. I have a deep voice. I can sing even deeper and I can do Donald Duck, bu haven't found a good Ellen voice. Best I can do so far is speak softly. But I look pretty!
Hugs, Ellen

[Krisi]

I wouldn't call it a problem, more of a blessing.

[PaulaQ]

Martha, I know a number of trans women who have naturally feminine sounding voices. For some, it just happens for them more or less. You are extremely lucky, at least if you want to have a feminine sounding voice, which many of us who transition do want to have. For the rest of us, developing a feminine sounding voice takes an enormous amount of work. (I fall into the latter category.) A lot of us simply don't bother to change our voices, because it is really hard to learn this well. I used a voice coach, with group and private lessons, as well as online materials. It took me more than a year to get it down, and honestly, I could improve.

One of the more frustrating things for those of us who struggle with this is that people for whom this comes fairly naturally will say stuff like "oh, I just watched a youtube video, and immediately got it!" Yeah, ok - for the rest of us, this is a slog.

BTW, the pitch of your voice is the least of the problem, although I will say that you must have a very high voice, because while I'm basically never misgendered face to face, it does happen to me once in a while over the phone. (It happens to a fair number of women over the phone once in a while, by the way.) Phones essentially act as low pass filters, and so the lower frequencies of your voice are what are going to be carried through. This tends to make your voice sound lower than it actually is. Couple that with society's view that "calling a man ma'am is a terrible insult. But calling a woman sir is just something that happens to women, and they need to get over it!", and you can see the problem.

Speaking softly and speaking in a higher pitch also really don't help. You sound like a guy whispering, or a guy talking in falsetto, when you do those things. I know, been there, done that. Failed.