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Thread: Told my wife and everything fell apart. I shouldn't have.

  1. #51
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    Feb 2013
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    3,912
    Quote Originally Posted by OnlyRed View Post
    Because sometimes I feel that every marriage, every man and every woman, does hide something.

    For example, if you look at a super model in a magazine and you fantasise having sex with her and jerk off, and that is not something a man would tell his wife. Aren't all marriages built on some level of secrets?
    Well, no, not really. If you communicate well with your spouse, there's not much reason to hide much of anything other than presents, before you give them.

    For example, I setup a channel this evening on our streaming media box so that my fiancé can view various adult sites on the TV, rather than on the tiny screen of his phone. He likes adult video. (Embarrassingly enough, I don't.) He knows about my girlfriend and what she and I do together. She'll hang out with us sometimes before I go out with her. We're all good friends. It wouldn't bother me if he had a girlfriend - at least as long as he told me about her.

    We try to be transparent here.

    I know this is a foreign concept, because our society discourages this, but honesty actually does work all the time. It does require a great deal of communication though.

  2. #52
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    1,336
    Quote Originally Posted by OnlyRed View Post
    For example, if you look at a super model in a magazine and you fantasise having sex with her and jerk off, and that is not something a man would tell his wife. Aren't all marriages built on some level of secrets?
    Umm..... No. You don't "manage" a partner, I'll tell you x and y but not z because you don't need to know it / you might not like it. You give your life partner everything, completely, absolutely. That's what I believe.

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