Advise about joining meetup group

[Liz57]

I want to join a local meetup group. It asked for stuff like name, etc., sign on with Facebook. I see that it lists other groups. Not sure I want my name out in public as belonging to a cd meetup group. I'm about to the point where personally I don't care but my wife doesn't feel that way and I have to respect that.

Should I use Liz or my real name? What are the ramifications of signing on through Facebook? Any advice will be appreciated.

Liz

[Kimberly2112]

I'm not on FB, but my understanding is that they insist you use your real name for *everything* and that everything you do through FB is tied together, and least in their database. Google Plus is a lot less strict. I recently applied to a Meetup group using my G+ account, which doesn't contain my real name. I'd recommend creating a free G+ account using the name you'd prefer and logging onto Meetup with that.

[AllieSF]

Check see if they have an email address or phone number. Most "T" support groups clearly understand the need for extreme confidentiality for some of their members. If you can contact them you can ask all the questions you want and explain your specific situation. Also since there are some Florida ladies here, you may want to ask them if they know that group and give you some needed information. Good luck.

[phili]

On meetup you can sign up w your email and make An individual profile w pic for each group, although your name is the same for all groups undr that email. You can hide your groups but if you want to use twonames you would have to use two different t emails and have two Meetup accounts ! It is a bit of a nuisance since your browser keeps track and you may find you have to only be one person at a time on your computer.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I'm in several T meetup groups (i.e., meetup.com) and I signed up with my Steffi yahoo email address.

The other me does have a FB account, but I only use it for my male activities, and even then, I don't use it much.

I didn't like how good it was at guessing people I might know, based on friends of friends, and I was getting too many worthless notices about person x going to some restaurant or some play thousands of miles away.

[BettyMorgan]

I am a member of a crossdressing social club in Canada. We meet once a month and it's a safe space to meet other CDs to relax and talk. I look forward to it each month.
We are allowed to maintain our anonymity. Whatever we chose to reveal is up to us. There is never any reason to give anyone the name on our birth certificates.

Personally, I have a separate FB profile with my femme name. It works just fine.

[Eva Bella]

I joined a local meetup group through Google. Eva has her own Google identity and email, it was very easy to set up and does not have to be tied to anything else

[Tracii G]

Eva is exactly right.
Open an email in your female persona and go with that.
I have male and female FB accounts and they are on different browsers and not linked in any way.

[ReineD]

Should I use Liz or my real name? What are the ramifications of signing on through Facebook? Any advice will be appreciated.

You can control what others see on facebook. This is how you do it:

https://www.facebook.com/help/167941163265974

[Krististeph]

Facebook: assume that anyone can access the worst.

Often not an issue- but archival posts can surface.

I would LOVE to get in touch with old friends, and recent acquaintances, but not at the risk of facebooks' security access issues.

If you post it is in no way confidential.

[mykell]

hi liz,
i just started a group, i have my own separate e-mail account for my t-self,
my group is set to keep things private, for members only, and i ask for a photo to be approved,
all the notifications for the meet-ups go through the e-mail that you used to join, mine goes through the meet-up network so it is kept private.
i can not see the users e-mails that join so they are not shared. if you are a member of other meet-ups they are listed in general for all meet-up members.

so by having a separate e-mail account it should keep things fairly discreet for your comfort, like this forum, and anything you do on the inter-web you have inherent risk of exposure, i dont trust facebook and only had a business account but to use it they keep demanding more info each year and they keep changing the rules as you play. not comfortable with that.

so having said that i was rewarding to start the group, i met someone who was interesting and i hope will become a true friend, i also had a first timer and have suggested that he join another support vehicle i attend Pflag, and am looking forward to my next meeting....

my wife and i keep this private and like everything i do now its up front, i asked if i could start the group, she voiced her concerns and i saw that how im handling this should keep it private. their will always be risk, just from the brief encounters i have had when you meet someone from the area you have what if moments, at least i did, so i would avoid using facebook and open an outlook account for your fem self. as for your meetup name Liz first name Fiftyseven last name.

good luck and i hope you meet some interesting folks....

[Teresa]

Liz,
If you have a choice of groups shop around !
The one I attend doesn't have a membership you can just turn up and pay the small entrance fee on the night. They make no requests for names formally and certainly don't ask about FB accounts.
I don't trust FB security or like their policy on use of pictures, I will add that even when attending a group be aware of who takes pictures and what they do with them. I was told that at my first meeting a group of us were posted on Hotchix site, I guess I was naive thinking that wouldn't happen but as far as I'm aware the pics were modified or removed.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Liz , See line #4 in my signature .

[Pat]

I've heard that Facebook requires real names but I've never experienced that. It seems like all you really need is a valid email address and those are pretty easy to get. Why not try creating a Liz Facebook page and see how far it gets you?

[Liz57]

Thanks girls for all of the advice.

Just as I suspected, several things were brought up that I hadn't thought about. It looks like I should set up email in Liz's name, maybe even Facebook in that name as well.

It's a little scary to think you might end up in a group picture and then someone else posts it where you might not want.

Liz

[Jaymees22]

I recently joined a meetup group, not too difficult. I have two FB accounts and that's not difficult either, I rarely use either one as others have said they seem to want too much info. Just provide the minimum and you can make up a lot of it and even change it if you want. Good luck Jaymee

[CONSUELO]

Be very wary of FB. Yes you can control who can see your posts and information but FB loves to link to everything, and I mean everything.
I had a big surprise when I was on another site using a different name and a private e mail that I only share with a very few, and I happened to hit a button and within hours I had a post on my FB site that I used for keeping up with some friends and family.

I closed down the FB account immediately. I now know how it happened but I was surprised by how easy it was to misunderstand something and then find that FB loves to link your activity back to your FB page as they believe that this is a good thing. For example searching for a hotel that had a FB page I found that it linked back to my FB page. I also had a big surprise when someone I had swapped e mails and a telephone conversation with suddenly showed up on my FB page as someone whom I might like to link up with. I still don't know how that happened but it made me very suspicious of FB and I no longer have anything to do with it. As I see it FB is the equivalent of Big Brother in George Orwell's "1984"

So, be very very careful.

[Jessica5536]

I maintain a FB account for my male side and a seperate one for my female side.
Facebook does require a real name, but it can be any name you want. There is no enforcement or requirement to prove one way or another.
I have seperate accounts like this on amazon and other sites too. Ive never had any issues.

I think FB got enough backlash from the trans community that they pulled away on the real name thing.

[Sometimes Steffi]

Thanks girls for all of the advice.

Just as I suspected, several things were brought up that I hadn't thought about. It looks like I should set up email in Liz's name, maybe even Facebook in that name as well.

It's a little scary to think you might end up in a group picture and then someone else posts it where you might not want.

Liz

If you're worried about pictures on line, be very careful.

This is the T meetup group I'm in.

http://www.meetup.com/DC-TransLadies-Community/

I think all the pics are public. See if you can find me.

Here are a couple of hints (Where's Waldo?)

http://www.meetup.com/DC-TransLadies...267/#447587476

http://www.meetup.com/DC-TransLadies...267/#447587478

If you can't find me there, this one is esy:

http://www.meetup.com/DC-TransLadies...267/#447587921

It's not really obvious, but I'm wearing red sparkly eye shadow like Lady Gaga singing the Star Spangeled Banner at the Superbowl.

[Georgette_USA]

I find this group to be the most fun, going all kinds of places.

Love to you Steffi. I am also in the group photos.