How come you are not transsexual?

[JoselineWalthorne]

Hmm. I have been having this conversation alot lately. I like the idea of being trans, lately i feel as if i am dressed the wrong way when i go to work and i feel dirty in my male wardrobe. sadly i cant exactly go out my front door in drag cuz im still trying to read the town i live in. is it safe to dress this way or not. I feel if i get good at my make up i can pass as a woman, and not a cheap-... sorry im getting off topic. Back when i lived in California my family made it like this known truth. My little cousins look up to me in a big way, and any changes i make wont just effect me, it will effect them. I love my family and in no way do i want to walk out of their lives so i can have the right body and live without my personal live effecting them in a good or bad way.
Ehh it gets personal from here so ill leave it at this, I feel like i am transgender but am content on putting on the persona that makes me feel dirty just to be the older sibling my family needs me to be when i visit on the holidays. If i figure out a way to fem out all the other days a year, i have 0 problem putting on a mask for a week to make an appearance :3

[heatherdress]

I never really understood the point of this thread - "How come we are not something we are not?"

A lot of good answers explaining what we are, or think we are, or want to be, or what we feel like, or words that we think describe us. I feel like this thread is one of those cards sent around at work when someone leaves and you have to write something and someone has already taken the words you wanted to write.

[JoselineWalthorne]

I never really understood the point of this thread - "How come we are not something we are not?"

A lot of good answers explaining what we are, or think we are, or want to be, or what we feel like, or words that we think describe us. I feel like this thread is one of those cards sent around at work when someone leaves and you have to write something and someone has already taken the words you wanted to write.

I simply took it as a critical thinking thread. :3

[Pat]

I never really understood the point of this thread

And yet you replied. Several times. So something's going on. Sure, the thread thesis is a little bizarre... why am I not a marble statue? Why am I not a squirrel? (Opinions vary on that last.) I've always felt that I can never answer any question that starts with "why" because I can never really say why, at best I can only describe how. Why does the earth orbit the sun? I can give a detailed explanation of how it happens but I can't say why it happens.

But we talk (write? correspond?) using our words that we think describe us and sometimes those words resonate with someone else and they gain a little insight into themselves and then describe what they've learned and perhaps we get a little insight into ourselves as well. I first came to this site pretty confused. But reading many people's experiences and illusions helped me understand me better and continues to do so. I think that's where the value is.

[Sandyhappygirl]

Jennie.

You say 'Why does the earth orbit the sun? I can give a detailed explanation of how it happens but I can't say why it happens.' I say 'Newtons Law of Universal Gravitation, that's why'. You see you can do why as well as how. The difficult one of course is why does gravity exist? (the answer: because it can).

[Pat]

I don't want to take this down a rathole, but Newton's Laws describe how things happen, not why. And in a move parallel to the concept of binary gender, Einstein later proved Newton to be correct 99% of the time but not the whole answer.

[Sandyhappygirl]

Jennie, I think we definitely wandered down a rat hole as you suggest. Humble apologies if I led you to the entrance and invited you in and totally off-thread so to speak. However, you are mistaken. Gravity, or more specifically the existence of it, is WHY the earth orbits the sun. HOW it does it is simply the mathematical equations associated with gravity, the mass of the objects, relative speeds etc etc etc. No gravity = no orbiting (and no celestial objects to do it with come to think of it). Now, what was this thread about (I think I had better go back to the beginning and start again)?

Love Sandy x

I am never wrong. I once thought I was wrong but it turned out I was mistaken.

[heatherdress]

And yet you replied. Several times. So something's going on. Sure, the thread thesis is a little bizarre... why am I not a marble statue? Why am I not a squirrel? (Opinions vary on that last.) I've always felt that I can never answer any question that starts with "why" because I can never really say why, at best I can only describe how. Why does the earth orbit the sun? I can give a detailed explanation of how it happens but I can't say why it happens.

But we talk (write? correspond?) using our words that we think describe us and sometimes those words resonate with someone else and they gain a little insight into themselves and then describe what they've learned and perhaps we get a little insight into ourselves as well. I first came to this site pretty confused. But reading many people's experiences and illusions helped me understand me better and continues to do so. I think that's where the value is.

Jennie - Fine to have a random thread that enables people to say what is on their mind. But if a reader takes the time to read each response in this thread, what would they see of value? What would they learn? What is apparent might be confusion and contradiction. Maybe there is value in that, for some. I guess I am just tired of threads that ramble without focus, generate more confusion than understanding, and leave us more apart than together. Don't forget, this thread begins with a question asking why we are not something that we are not, which is logically unanswerable.

[Brenda456]

For me, transitioning would be expensive and not practical. I would love to transition but being married, having kids, my job, the expense all make it impractical.

[mechamoose]

I'm not a..

What? squirrel?!?!@?!

/chase

Vote me in for Jennie.

Cripes Jennie, most folks want warning on math, never mind physics. };>

My toes are PINK today!!

- MM

[MissDanielle]

For me, transitioning would be expensive and not practical. I would love to transition but being married, having kids, my job, the expense all make it impractical.

For some of us, it's practical in order to live. I'm just passed the transition or die moment and pretty much missed the whole CDing phase en route to transition. You can thank years of repression for that.

[jacques]

hi,
perhaps if was growing up today things would be different.
now there is the internet and information and a sense of community - why I was young I just did not fit in and did not know why.
luv J

[flatlander_48]

I am never wrong. I once thought I was wrong but it turned out I was mistaken.

Lucy Van Pelt?!?!?! I didn't know that you dressed...

Don't forget, this thread begins with a question asking why we are not something that we are not, which is logically unanswerable.

Perhaps the question may have been a bit inarticulate in structure, but I took it to mean something like:

What makes you think that you are A and not B?

You might also consider it to be:

Where is the line for you (between Crossdressing, Transgender and Transsexual)?

DeeAnn

[PattyT]

I belong to that group of crossdressers who feel a strong need and desire to dress in female attire. This is a very important aspect of my life, and I can go so far to say that only when I am en femme am I my true self.
However, it stops there. I have wondered from time to time whether I was a kind of transgender but being on this list has tought me that I am most certainly not. I do not share the feelings of those who are transgender. I am a 100% male and who is also a very hard core CD. Although I have an immensely strong female orientation when it comes to clothes, that's as far as I go in my female oroentation.
I am perfectly happy with this situation.

[Roxy]

Thank you for this thread.
I've been asking myself this question for a while and after reading all the post I can truly answer the question.
I am a guy. When I dress up, I love being wrapped in femininity and I try to act like a lady but I don't feel like one inside. I have had fantasies of changing for an extended weekend but when I get up in the morning and go to work, I'm a guy.
On the work subject, I think it would be fun to wear high heel boots, mini skirt, tank top & tool belt.

[Dana44]

I met a lot of CD's and some of them are so feminine. But they know they are men and one lives one hundred percent female and enjoys it. so many more of them. One spends time working on another part of the country for six months and is always en Feme there but when he goes home to his wife who is accepting but he is male at home. Others are like that so many others in various stages but none of them are in transition, yet I did meet one in transition. But out of over 100 of them, only one was in transition. I told him about this site but haven't seen him here yet.

[Judy-Somthing]

I've been cross-dressing for 50 years, I love it , it's so much fun.
I use to think I wanted to be a woman in my teens but I never felt any desire to be with a man.
I love banging women, my wife, LOL and I dress up as Judy when I get a chance. (wife doesn't know)

[Karine]

I do not really know how to respond. I can just say that I like being a man, I like my life, love my girlfriend.
I just sometimes like to embrass this little part of me and have fun with girls' stuff.
In a way, it is because I crossdress punctually that I have so much fun doing it.

[shortskirt87]

I am who I am.

[Stacy082]

I am who I am.

I know as far as me, I have always had very strong feelings for dressing. Now that I am grown and a little older, it is way more than dressing!! I can't stand being a male anymore. I feel like I have to transition. It seems like the only way to survive. Just the way I feel.

[StarrOfDelite]

Thanks very much for the link to the WaPo article. It is indeed interesting.

I was particularly moved by the anecdote where the transsexual surgeon witnessed a shock treatment being administered to a transgender in St. Louis in the 1960's, and the comment, "They were trying to remove something that can't be removed."

I personally have been CD'ing for about 20 years, and am a late-bloomer. I feel Fem sometimes, and feel Masc sometimes, but I never feel that I am a woman trapped in a man's body. On the other hand, I am also a late blooming Pansexual in my sex orientation, and when I go to bed with a man I never think of it as being Gay Sex because I am identifying myself as Fem at the time. I've never had sex with a man except when I'm presenting as a woman.

I like being androgynous, and have no desire to transition.

I'm with Jennifer. I tell my wife the best part about crossdressing is that I can go back to dressing as a male. There was an interesting article this past week-end in the Washington Post. I concur that the reason we are crossdressers or transsexcual is due to the "hormonal wash" theory. As a crossdresser, it's just not as strong for me to identify as a female. I prefer the clothes and trying to understand the motivation for wigs and make-up.

Here's the link to that WashPost article: http://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/nat...sgender-at-70/

[Maria Blackwood]

Jennie.

You say 'Why does the earth orbit the sun? I can give a detailed explanation of how it happens but I can't say why it happens.' I say 'Newtons Law of Universal Gravitation, that's why'. You see you can do why as well as how. The difficult one of course is why does gravity exist? (the answer: because it can).

Curvature of spacetime.

[FemPossible]

I see a couple of questions that keep popping up, one is "what do you mean by trans?" and the other is "what does this question mean?". Sorry for waiting so long to post, I've been busy with some personal stuff.

What do you mean by trans? - Sorry, on another forum that I go to it's kinda easy to just say "trans" because to mostly everyone there it means the same thing. When I said that I am trans, I meant that I identify as a gender other than the one that I was assigned at birth.

What does this question mean? - Once again, sorry for any confusion. Although in my defense I kinda did ask the question clearly the first time. But I'll be more clear this time. *ahem* For those of you who identify as male... why? I get that this comes off as a silly question, but as a transgender person (not transgender as in under an umbrella, but transgender as in I don't identify as the gender assigned to me at birth) I am often asked that question. I just wanted to see how cisgender people would answer that same question.

[Stephanie47]

I've never had a desire to become a woman. I have absolutely no negative feelings concerning women. If I was not a man, then being a woman would be OK too. I have a theory about why I like wearing women's clothing. My wife has made remarks that seem to be akin to my reasoning. We are in a DADT marriage. Over the past year, and, since she had a back operation and I am waiting on her hand and foot, she has stated several times she believes in a past life I was a woman. She had made that statement concerning transsexuals, especially when Caitlynn Jenner was in the news. She had made that statement many times when the news comes on with all these "bathroom bills."

I too believe there is some truth to influence concerning past life experiences.