Georgette, I was referring to the stereotype
Georgette, I was referring to the stereotype
How you react is first determined by whether or not you are interested. Lol
As to the age thing ... Lol... Reine I'm older than you and I'm hit on a lot. And Jennifer ....I can assure you nice people of all ages continue to have a healthy sex drive long after some might consider them "washed up". Passion, love and a need for intimacy are not attributes that belong exclusively to the young.
I will say this.. Most guys are respectful once you set them straight. It does not have to he mean spirited. For some guys approaching a women takes a lot of courage. I respect that and try to be nice even when totally uninterested. Then again , I confess I've wasted a perfectly good drink or two in my time when some creep needed a good dousing to calm his crass ardor .... though, in such cases, withering sarcasm also usually works.
Good luck!
Every fear that held me back, when faced, has proven to be hollow.
Courage is not the lack of fear, but the willingness to ignore it.
It's your life. Make it count.
Jennifer
I assumed you might have been referring to stereotypes. I will resort to some things in a sarcastic way. Not big on stereotypes, I tend to respond such.
If I thought you really felt that way it might have been worse.
Found my new calling this last weekend. A big sister to the younger newer MtF TS. At a club and some guy was chatting a group of us up. A friend was OK, but he turned creepy quick, getting all touchy feely with her. I noticed she was not sure what to do, so I put my arm around her, and told him to back away as she was with me and we did not appreciate that type of activity.
Samantha
You put it much better than I could. Never had to resort to the drink dousing yet. I find being straight forward or sarcasm works for me.
I don't consider the bumping of grocery carts being hit on. Nor do I consider I'm hit on when a man says hi to me, or opens my door. Bumping a grocery cart only requires an "Excuse me" and moving on, no need to put a lot of thought into this. lol. If someone says "hi", you just say "hi" back and again move on. If someone opens a door, you say "thank you" and move on. Now IF they follow that up with, "Excuse me but I think you're hot and I'm wondering if you'd like to have a drink with me", THEN that's being hit on.
I assumed this is what the OP meant, when she asked how to respond to these things. But, women in their 50s and older get much fewer of these types of proposals than they did when they were younger. That's just a fact of life. And that's because a lot of men aren't as energetic as they age. That's another fact of life.
(Thanks for the compliment Jenn) and it's true, middle aged women become invisible. There's an entire flock of younger women out there getting the attention, as they should. What's also true is that most middle aged women don't mind the invisibility. It comes with the territory. I consider myself pretty average. I'm happy in my relationship. I'm not looking for anyone else. And if I were alone, I don't think I'd be seeking a brand new relationship anyway, and so I dress correspondingly which means presentable, comfortable, with not a lot of focus on dresses, skirts, heels, etc, unless I'm going somewhere special, and even that is only occasionally.
I want to add that by invisible, I don't mean that middle aged women cease to count. Not at all. I have friends, I go out, I have fun, I have lots of interesting conversations with lots of interesting people, I travel and meet more interesting people (who are not hitting on me ), and when I'm involved in projects I have ideas and I am heard. The invisibility Jenn mentioned and that I speak of, relates specifically to having men hit on you. And like I said, younger men don't see middle aged women that way. And older men don't have the energy they once did. How many old guys stand at corners cat calling the hot young women walking by.
Last edited by ReineD; 05-02-2016 at 01:03 AM.
Reine
At age 73 or whatever you think you look like when dressed as a woman, your chances of being "hit on" are pretty slim, assuming of course that you are in normal places doing normal things. Walking back and forth in front of a bar at 2:00 AM in six inch heels and a miniskirt would be different.
Start by wearing a wedding ring. If a conversation with a man starts going the wrong way, just tell him you are married and show him your ring. You can tell him your husband is coming back soon. Using your natural male voice will probably send him on his way.
I don't think the thought that you are a man and can beat him up is a good one to count on. There's at least a fifty fifty chance that he can beat you up and you are probably not used to fighting with boobs and heels on. You will feel uncomfortable going to jail with boobs and heels anyway.
I am not gay but used to go dressed to gay bars with drag shows. Once, a man starting talking to me and bought me drinks. I enjoyed it, carefully, and went home alone. It was fun.
I remember the very first time I went out dressed to a CD bar in Jersey. I had a guy across the bar buy me a drink. After about 10 minutes I went over to say hello and we were talking and chatting. I was really curious to see how it was to be the "prey". He started rubbing my legs and stomach and was really sweet. I was getting a little overwhelmed and told him so and he actually was very nice and understanding and calming me down. I decided to leave after a few more minutes. I just got scared and was feeling these things I never did before. He walked me out and we made out in the parking lot a little bit. I really enjoyed it. My advice would be just trust yourself and your gut. Good will come out of it way more than bad.
Just keep avoiding them, say no, shake your head, pull away in the opposite direction and all this lets those around you that you are distressed and not wanting his presence.
I don't dress to impress, I dress to outdress
Martha,
If you get hit on, regect the advances politely and move on.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
I usually tell them I'm a lesbian or just ignore them....mostly just smile and act like I was too busy in a hurry and keep on moving. My gf would be much ruder to men or women if that were to happen with her present I believe.
You're a Daisy if you do! -Doc Holliday
Martha - If you get hit on while crossdressing at 73 years young, record it, and go viral. Have fun.
I asked my GF that and she said, if he touches you after you make it known you don't want that, SCREAM at him so everyone can hear, Stop F-ing touching me you pervert !!!