Maz, I can't speak for your husband, but I can add my story to the others you have already heard. I don't remember my first time dressing exactly, but I know it was in my tween years and involved tights I found in a box of old clothes my parents had stored in the back of my closet. From there I moved on to my mom's pantyhose, skirts, and swimsuits. I was deep in the closet until two years after I got married. I thought it would go away, but as we started to settle into our home together, the access to my wife's clothes (especially former Halloween costumes) was too tempting. I finally opened up to her, and it nearly broke us up. Like you, she said the CDing wasn't so much a problem as the secrecy. It took a long time (years) for me to regain her trust. It was also very hard for me to start being honest about CDing. For so many years I had gotten so good at hiding at denying it (as is necessary for survival, at least socially, if not physically), that it was hard to break the habit. If I had some time at home alone, she'd return and ask me, "Did you dress while I was out?" My gut instinct was immediately to state "NO!" but I had to force myself to be honest and say, "Yes, a little."
Our relationship now is stronger than it was before I came out, and although my wife prefers not to see me dressed, we can talk and joke about it. We are approaching our 15th anniversary, and she has known that I am a CD for 13 of those years. I have no intentions of transitioning, but yes, I could see myself dressing more often once the kids move out (many years from now).
