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Thread: Name the person who has had the most positive impact on your crossdressing journey

  1. #1
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    Name the person who has had the most positive impact on your crossdressing journey

    Ever since I started crossdressing, I have had alot of good support from people, both from friends and family. 99% of sales associates have been helpful, polite, and courteous about me being a male-to-female crossdresser.
    When I first started shopping at Victoria's Secret, I was afraid to go into the store for fear of what people would think. After the manager confirmed that I was ok to shop for myself, my crossdressing life changed for the better. Up to that point, I began to think I'd never be able to wear a bra, but they made a dream come true for me, and every time I put on a bra, I feel like the woman I so strongly desire to be. The people at Victoria's Secret have been nothing but helpful, and they recognize me and help me alot when I go into 1 of their stores.
    There are 2 articles of women's clothing which I love to wear the most, and that is a bra and a corset. I had the bra all figured out, but wearing a corset was difficult for me because I just couldn't lace it up properly. I wrote stories about my favorite female video game character Princess Peach and how she would wear a corset to give her a perfect girlish figure. Whenever I write about her, I put myself in her character and pretend I am her, wearing a corset and all. This only made me want to wear one even more badly than ever before. I began to give up hope that I'd ever be able to wear a corset.
    Then before going to a Ren Fair, I sent an email to a corset shop there asking about prices and the sizes they had. The lady who runs the shop replied to my email and said "Feel free to come in! We would love to strap you into 1 of our corsets!" Although my friends were with me and even though I was already dressed up like a Fair Maiden, I couldn't resist going into the shop, knowing I was going to miss out on a great opportunity if I didn't.
    This nice lady who's nickname at the fair is Kitty V helped me strap into one. Since I had a male body and was trying to fit into a lady's corset, I was concerned that it would not work too well. But Kitty knew her stuff and asked me if I was comfortable in the corset. Each time I would reply "Make it tighter", and while it did indeed feel tight, it felt nice and snug as well, and I had the girlish figure I so strongly desired to have.
    A year later I went back and bought an overbust corset because they tend to be sexier. And it seems like every time I wear a corset, I'm able to go a little bit tighter. Wearing corsets is the greatest thing in the world to me. I love the way they look and feel.
    Getting back to Kitty V, she was ultimately responsible for me finally getting to wear a corset fully laced up, and she is always willing to help me lace it up. I've rewarded her not only by spending money in her store, but after the Ren Fair wrapped up for the year, I tipped her because of how helpful, polite, and courteous she was. She is my hero! What about the rest of you?

  2. #2
    Member Fiona_44's Avatar
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    There is no one single person I can point out as having the most impact. What has had the single biggest impact on my crossdressing journey so far are all the wonderful gals on this website. It is through reading their stories, answering my questions and offering support that I had the courage to take the next step and go outside dressed for the first time 2 months ago. Taking that step has made me extremely happy and elevated my dressing to a place I thought I would never attain. I now hate going out in drab and am now out dressed as much as possible.
    YOLO

  3. #3
    Senior Member Kris Burton's Avatar
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    This is an easy one for me - my wife. Before we even started dating (42 years ago - yikes!) I admired her sense of fashion and style. It was her garments I tried on secretly so many years ago. It was she that accepted me when I began to dress actively, and it was her style I realize now I was trying to emulate. She patiently taught me the basics of makeup, guided me as I took it in my own direction, and assists in all things CD, through open discussion and often encouragement. There is no sneaking around, nothing to hide, and that makes it so easy. Plus, since we are both the same size it's often win-win in terms of wardrobe - although we do have differences in shoe style and size!

    I also have been very positively impacted by those I have met along the way, and like Fiona that includes the persons here quite significantly!
    www.flickr.com/people/194195593@N05/

  4. #4
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    I would have a hard time crediting any one person. Over the years there have been surprising contributors. Early in our marriage, my first wife coyly suggested I put on her bra and panties for a little bedroom fun. Up til that point, I though I had out grown my interest in women?s clothing. For nearly two decades I underdressed most of the time. She seemed to enjoy our little secret. Other things brought the relationship to an end.

    I told my second wife about my underdressing. it had then been on a long hiatus, but we were getting serious and I thought I should be honest about it. She was ok with it as long as, to use her words, I do not have to see you fully dressed as a woman. At the time, that seemed unimaginable, so things went along fine, until I felt a growing need to go farther. I finally asked her if she would allow me to dress fully around her, and she relented. But true enough, she never saw me the same way again, to use her words. So, though it went farther than she wanted, certainly she contributed to my growing sense of style and how to present myself….unintended consequences, I guess.

    Around that same time period, I came out to a few close GG friends. They were enormously helpful in helping me with finer points of makeup, but most importantly, in giving me encouragement and support as I ventured out into the public more and more often. Five of them stand out to me, in order of my coming out: Sandra, Rikki, Blanca, Jennifer and Margaret. Each of them were really instrumental in helping me feel accepted as a woman, part-time or not.
    Last edited by kimdl93; 05-30-2022 at 11:01 PM.

  5. #5
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    Since I have told precious few people, it's rather easy for me to identify the people who have helped. I can count on one hand the people who I've told (other than those at a support group I went to >10 years ago). Of those, the only one that made any different to my crossdressing life has been my wife. She's the only one ever to buy me items, only one to ever encourage me, and the most accepting.

    Outside of her, I'd have to agree with many here; it's the forum.

  6. #6
    Member AmeeJo's Avatar
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    The most impact has, hands down, been here in this forum. That being said, I have had several very positive interactions with various SAs at various stores. The Clinique ladies at my local Ulta beauty were awesome! They made my makeup adventure so much fun. I too love wearing corsets and I got mine online from Orchard Corset. I had no idea what to get so I consulted their sizing experts. They were so helpful and the first one I tried did not workout but they worked with me to get me into the "one". Overall, I'm finding this journey is much more accepted now then in years past. One day I'll let my wife in on my little secret....maybe.
    We can only achieve what we dare to reach for.

  7. #7
    Member Joanne108's Avatar
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    It would have to be my wife. For many reasons tolerating it then not then realizing that I am just me wearing different clothes!

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member Heather76's Avatar
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    No question it is my wife based on the simple fact she has accepted the fact I enjoy crossdressing. The only limitations she has given me is to not embarrass her. That means not letting family and friends in on my secret. She has also said she doesn't want to see me with makeup on. Other than those boundaries, I can dress as much as I want at home and as often as I want.
    It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
    Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
    I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.

  9. #9
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    Well Rainbow, what a delightful story. I would probably credit at least 5 persons and venues. The store, Glamour Boutique, in that they responded to an inquiry that I made for help with getting the feminization process started by referring me to persons who could help with makeup, looks, expressions, etc. . The two persons who actually are providing me with makeup lessons, and support and encouragement to go out in public. This forum for the information and stories, issues and opinions. A transgender friend who is quite the girl, I have known her for going on 2 years. And finally myself! Being very self sufficient, I rely on myself to make things happen. When I put my mind to something, I will make as many efforts as I can to see it through.

    So a combination of events and persons have assisted me!

    Jess 😊

  10. #10
    Avatar is FaceAp enhanced Mary Loo's Avatar
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    Like many others have stated. My wife is really the only one who knows, other than this forum, so those are my only two options. Despite having started decades ago, I really haven’t truly tried to emulate a female until very recently and still have many steps to go, but yes, my wife at least has not run for the hills or scolded me and has helped some now and then, including shopping this weekend that I posted about.

    She, too, has a long way to go, and like me, may never get there, but at least we are working this through, together and we have always based our relationship on solid, honest communication.

  11. #11
    Miss Conception Karren Hutton's Avatar
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    I can think of no one single person that has influenced my crossdressing. I like to think that it was all me who took the risks, taught myself makeup, went out shopping for corsets and wigs and bras for myself, figured out how to develop my breasts and learned to dress and act more feminine. To me it is and always will be a solo endeavor. Something that I alone can control.

    But I would like to give an honorable mention to the hundreds of lingerie models in the JC Pennys and Sears catalogues for pointing the way and keeping me interested and showing me how it is supposed to be done! Lol.

  12. #12
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    This is a tale I've posted a number of times but that's a reflection of it's importance to me.

    Some years ago while attending a support group meeting I sat chatting to a girl, who to be bunt, looked pretty badly dressed. Her dress was way to small, nothing about her outfit, her overall look worked.

    During our conversation she told me she was staying overnight in the hotel where the meeting was being held and next day she was going enfemme shopping. A little taken aback I asked if she ever encountered any adverse reactions, stares, name calling to which she replied no.

    It was at that moment I made the decision that if she could do it, then so could I. So next day I drove to a shopping retail park, pulled up my big girl knickers and walked into my first shop dressed. The rest as they say is history.

    A few years later our paths crossed again. This time her appearance had greatly improved. I told her I had a confession to make, how she inspired me and hoped she wasn't too offended by my honesty.

    She said no, she knew her presentation was poor back then and members of the group had helped her improve.

    So along with the good folk her who I'll place a very close second I'll nominate that girl who's name I can't remember but who undoubtedly had such a huge impact upon my CD'ing journey.

  13. #13
    Time to step out! Erin77's Avatar
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    I opened up to one of my co workers a few years ago. I still don't know why I did but she was the most accepting lady I have ever met. She encouraged me to be who I wanted to and dress how I wanted to. She offered me her spare condo to dress and just lounge around in. She gave me make up advice and clothing advice. She also just let me experiment with my femme side. I learned alot about myself thanks to her.

    She retired from work this year. Miss her dearly.

  14. #14
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    Not that many people know about my CDing, oy a few people do, but there was a woman by the name of Gaye who helped me crossdress about 10 to 15 years ago. Other that her there really hasn't been anyone else. One of the first things she said to me when I showed her two skirts I had at the time was the comment, "you've got female hormones." Don't know why but that comment has always stayed with me ever since. She was also the one who helped me to "step out" in public for the first time in public dressed en femme, so I'll be forever grateful to her for that.

  15. #15
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    The person who has had the most positive impact on my dressing is my wife by being accepting and encouraging.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  16. #16
    Member Cynthia_0101's Avatar
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    I would have to say first off would be my lovely Wife. She was the first person I ever told and she accepted me 100%. Although she may not have been able to help me with things like makeup over the years as she never wears it she was there every time I thought I needed to buy something new and never judged me for it.

    A close second would be a former colleague I had who I came out to, she was a fountain of information for anything from shaving, and pantyhose to makeup essentials.

    Both of these women deserve equal amounts of praise for all they put up with over the years and helped me to become the person I am now.
    Be Yourself, And Be Fabulous While Doing it!

  17. #17
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    Wonderful story, Rainbow. Wonderful when you find something that really triggers a full reaction that appeals to our desire to be at least more female-like.

    Back in late 2012 when I came out I saw a therapist named Elizabeth or Izzie. She was a blessing as were several members of the group sessions I attended. Everybody was following their own individual path but we all helped each other. They set me on the course to finding and materializing the person I am today. Izzie moved on and the groups dissolved, but I am very grateful to everyone.

  18. #18
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    I'd say there were 3 people who had the strongest influence on me and helped me to be who I am today.
    The first, of course, is my wife who through her understanding and acceptance helped me understand myself and grow.
    The second would be the President of the support group I belonged to in NJ. That is Pat and she took the mystery and the fear of meeting others away with her strength and her humor.
    The third is a member here and that would be Becky Anderson. Unfortunately I'm sorry to say we had a falling out that I've been unable to reconcile, but she showed me how to be open, fearless and honest about who I am. I miss her friendship and the times we shared shopping, dining and just being friends.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  19. #19
    Member Read only MiniRock's Avatar
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    starrynowhere

  20. #20
    Silver Member NancySue's Avatar
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    Hands down..my wife. I told her before the nuptials, thinking she?d dash to the nearest exit door. With her modeling experience, she?s been a valuable resource of information, guidance, especially with makeup. Her acceptance, support and sense of humor is irreplaceable. I?m so blessed.

  21. #21
    Member cindylouho's Avatar
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    If it wasn't for my wife I might not be dressing up today. After disclosing it to her, and sharing it at varying levels for close to a year we had a pivotal talk that revealed to me my wife was internally suffering because of my dressing. I wouldn't hurt her for anything so I immediately stopped everything. After about 6 months, and many more conversations, it seemed the time was right so we slowly started to incorporate it into our lives. Today we are stronger than ever and my feminine side is more accepted by her than ever before. Stepping away from it all for a while helped me see what I was doing wrong in my efforts to successfully incorporate my new side into all aspects of our marriage, and these new ideas proved to be just what was missing in helping my wife accept and treat me more as a girl. Ultimately though if my wife wasn't such an incredibly inspiring woman it's likely that none of those ideas would have worked.
    Be the best you, be the true you.
    That said, I love faceapp so much I change my avatar daily

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  22. #22
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    Let's see, it all started with a little girl named Lana! It involved a cute white dress that she threw over her head! But maybe it was my wife who established not a DADT but a don't you dare! Well she passed away after 34 years and 5 months of marriage(yes, I loved her!) Then there is all of you here on the forum driving me forward with my baby steps! I decided to step out that DOOR!!!No wig and no make up! Well it went well! Now for that wig and some make up! I saw Jennifer for a transformation! Oh, my! This is me! 24/7/365 transwoman! No male side anymore! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  23. #23
    Aspiring Member krissy's Avatar
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    With me it was my wife's best friend she gave me my first clothes she did my make up my wife was there but she can't stand this part of me her friend tried to show her what it was that I liked but she freaked out.she has past away l miss her dearly.she is the only one who made me feel like I wasn't a freak of nature

  24. #24
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    Defiantly my SO, he has supported me wearing my swimsuits when other guys I have been with won't look at me wearing them or ask me to leave... That's not the only reason we are together but it's a part of it

  25. #25
    Aspiring Member Debbie Denier's Avatar
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    I knew most individuals would say their wife . Not in my case . Experimenting myself from a child to adult. Kathy the owner of a dress shop influenced me in my early years. Non judgemental assistance in accessorising outfits. Numerous female co workers. My late mother facilitated my dressing from 2011 to 2020 after I came out to her. Not one individual but several.

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