I'm 31 and trying to come to terms with CDing, which has been a theme throughout my life, but has only become something substantial in my life (ie, a semi-regular thing) in last 8 years or so. I've always hid it from my girlfriends and I hate that it's been that way. Even the two that I truly loved, I felt like I could never tell them and that the attraction would end immediately (not to mention their ability to keep it a secret...loose lips sink ships as we all know). And that deception with someone you love and care about doesn't feel good at all.
So trying to adjust my approach and meet people from the outset that would be accepting (and maybe even embracing?) of this quirky need that I have, but to be honest I have no idea where to start. And to be honest, since I moved out here (Boulder CO area) a couple years ago, I've found it generally very difficult to meet girls (as a "normal" guy), much moreso than back east, and so adding in this very specific additional criteria makes it seem like either I need to just take what I can get, or somehow adjust my approach.
There's a lot of collective knowledge and experience here -- what have you guys/gals, who have successfully navigated the dating scene as a CD, done that has helped you in finding an accepting "soulmate"? Any lessons learned? What would you do differently if you had the opportunity? Any particularly useful sites/resources?
My hope is that we can cobble together a list of tips might help anyone in a similar position to me who comes across this thread, but in case it helps with giving me some specific suggestions, here's a bit more about me and what I'm looking for.
- I've only dated GGs so far, but am open and curious about being with other that are anywhere on the gender spectrum (guys, girls, or anywhere in between - CDs, TSs, etc)
- Looking for someone in roughly my age range (mid 20s to mid 30s)
- Looking for dating. I'm not really a fan of one night stands. Having a one time thing with a guy (or TG) would be exciting, but I'm also concerned about staying safe and not contracting/spreading disease, and it seems like the slower approach is better in that regard.
- I'm looking for a real connection, but without expectations (eg, perusing the craigslist miscellaneous romance m4t section, you see a bunch of guys saying they're looking for a good sissy to be their wife...not 4 me)