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Thread: Why do I crossdress?

  1. #1
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    Why do I crossdress?

    This is a question I have often asked myself. There is no question that dressing is exhilarating and just feels right for me. But what attracted me to dressing in the first place? Is it something in my genetic make up? I started when I was 5 years old and there was no event in my life at that point that could have pushed me in that direction so again, why?

    I've read lots of theories on the Internet about why people crossdress but none seemed to really fit me. One thing that many of us have a tendency to do is emulate the people we admire. Kids emulate super heros and sports figures for example. So, my current theory on why I dress is that I love and admire women so much that I want to emulate them through dressing.

    Why do you crossdress?

  2. #2
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    D, This question has likely been the most asked in CD history. I think you are onto something, in that we emulate what we find beautiful in some women. But, we many also have genetic brain proneness to this. Most of us just don't know why. But, the clothes, themselves do something for us.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  3. #3
    Adyson Saikotsu's Avatar
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    I used to dress because I wanted to dress to match whatever gender I was at the given time, since it changes.
    These days I don't see it as crossdressing. I'm not wearing women's clothes or men's clothes. In wearing my clothes. Bonus if those clothes match my internal gender. No big deal if they don't.

  4. #4
    MIDI warrior princess Amy Fakley's Avatar
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    I started young as well ... too young to even remember properly, but my first clear memory of feeling this way was 5 or 6 ... and finally acting on it around 6 or 7.

    Back then it was just reaching toward something without understanding. It took me a lifetime, but I still don't really know why in any sort of logically satisfying way. But over time, I have come to understand ... there is for all intents and purposes, a girl hiding behind a whole lot of man-fascade living inside this genetically male mind. I still don't know how that'll play out in the long run, but for now ...

    I just try to peacefully accept that she is me and make room for that in my understanding of myself ... and I have to let that out into the real world every once and a while ... if I can maintain that balance, all is well and that really beats the alternative! :-)
    "Why shouldn't art be pretty? There are enough unpleasant things in the world." -Pierre-Auguste Renoir

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    Quote Originally Posted by Deliah View Post
    ...Is it something in my genetic make up? I started when I was 5 years old and there was no event in my life at that point that could have pushed me in that direction so again, why?...
    Yep. It's in your genes. Nothing else makes sense. Blue eyes, red hair, being gay... it's in the genes.

  6. #6
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    To emulate and experience being a woman that I want to be (with ).
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member Fiona123's Avatar
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    When I was young crossdressing was an intense sexual experience. Now I still want to crossdress but for for me it's as much spiritual as sexual, maybe more. It just feels right. I accept my self as transgender or crossdresser, knowing why is less important 🌺

  8. #8
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    I am relaxing at home in a bra and a miniskirt. I feel normal. It's the rest of the world that is crazy

    Ineke
    As 'Geraldine' used to say: "The devil made me do it"

  9. #9
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    Because it's fun!
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  10. #10
    Junior Member JessieA's Avatar
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    I think it is in my case due it is to the klinefelder's and my brain developing with traits of both genders.

  11. #11
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I think that I have both sides of my brain open and switch back and forth male/female. Been that way all my life and when fem I naturally crossdressed. Been doing that most of my life.
    Last edited by Dana44; 06-17-2016 at 06:07 PM.
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    While there is probably some sort of psychological trigger, I believe that our brains have been hardwired for crossdressing.

    You understand that the vast majority of men can crossdress and not feel anything special (except embarrassment), however just the thought of crossdressing makes us experience wonderful sensations. Most likely these sensations are caused by feel-good neurotransmitters being released by the brain (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin and others).

    During infancy our brains are making neural connections at a feverish pace and by the time we are three years old we have about 3X the amount of neural connections than an adult brain. This is called synaptogenesis and it occurs at infancy and puberty. Then largely through the learning process we undergo a neural pruning process where some neural connections are reinforced while others are broken. Then you are set up for synesthesia, a neurological phenomenon in which stimulation of one sensory pathway leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway. In this way your brain can be hardwired to interpret crossdressing as actual contact with a female.

    So that is the biological explanation, what is the psychological? It can take many forms, but it usually involves some sort of female envy or valuing female over males. In my case, my mother wanted a girl when I was born, and I was a disappointment. Then just 13 months later she gave birth to my sister. My mother was overjoyed. My sister was my mother's pampered little princess and she was praised for everything she did. I grew up thinking my mother would love me more if I was a girl and I was crossdressing by the time I was three years old. I also grew up believing that girls were naturally better than boys. I thought that all parents preferred girls. When I was a teenager I finally began to appreciate being a male, but before that I had no clue that there was anything good about being a male.

  13. #13
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    Why does there HAVE to be a trigger?
    Why this, why that,if I do this I must be that !!
    You just enjoy it and thats all the explanation I need anyway.
    The more you dig into the reasons why the more confusing it can become.
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  14. #14
    This Time Around Lauri K's Avatar
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    Why...........umm well

    Possibly it makes it easier for you to shop at Walmart, maybe you just fit in better with the scene and they won't think you are gay or something.......

    Seriously though.....Just enjoy the time you spend dressed and don't ask why because there is not a one size fit's all answer
    Way too Girly ! I couldn't smell the smoke, and now I'll watch the flames

    Out on Parole ......Woo Hoo

  15. #15
    Member Brynna M's Avatar
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    in the end you crossdress because you want to.

    Why do you wan to? That's a tough one.

    For me I know I like the way I look, smell, feel when dressed in a way I have never experienced dressed as a man. I haven't figured out more than that yet.
    I'm content being a once in a while girl.

  16. #16
    AKA Lexi Read only sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    Why does there HAVE to be a trigger?<snip>The more you dig into the reasons why the more confusing it can become.
    As mentioned, there doesn't have to be a trigger. But it's pretty clear that what we're doing doesn't fit with who the normal male is, because it's obvious that most of the time, it interferes with our chances of finding a mate and passing along our dna (if you've already had kids, and a wife who loves your crossdressing, congratulations, you beat the odds). So something is different somewhere, or something changed. It can be genetic, it can be hormonal, it can be psychological, or any combination of the above. Some of us really needed to know why we do this, because it can really screw up our life....it certainly did mine. If you're one of the lucky ones for who everything about your crossdressing makes things better, great; then I understand why you don't care.
    But for some of us, there's a conflict that we have to live with; that being a crossdresser interferes with the rest of what we want out of life. It especially comes into play, when we have sexual desires that don't quite fit with what we think we are. And that's why some of us have to keep digging until we figure it out. 30 years ago, the concept that there could be a physically male person, but who sexually identified as female, who was only sexually attracted to females was considered completely absurd. Now, we understand how that happens, and I'm sure it comes easier for the younger ones to understand and accept themselves. Me, I spent about 30 years figuratively banging my head against a wall because none of it made any sense at all.
    Life is simply easier to go through when we have an understanding of why we feel the way we do. Millions of people are miserable because they're in relationships with people they're incompatible with, but they dont' know why; but they're so sexually attracted to them, they won't leave. So they spend thier life in misery, with very brief moments of sexual ecstasy.
    Ever wonder why the person you have a crush on, doesn't fine you interesting at all? You can figure it out. Or go on, and keep barking up the wrong tree, while another person is right behind you who's dying to meet YOU.
    I don't understand why so many people prefer to live messed up lives in supposed blissful ignorance; then go out every weekend and get drunk, because things don't work out the way they want them to.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  17. #17
    Broker TakaraYu's Avatar
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    for me it's because I don't give clothing a gender(if it feel good I'll wear it), does this mean that my brain is wired to both sexes, don't know

  18. #18
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    SM its not that I don't care about people that have problems in their relationships due to cross dressing.
    In this case the question why was asked so I answered if you didn't like it I'm sorry but the subject of situations like you are in were not the subject.
    SM aren't the people that obsess over all the hows and whys,feel they need answers usually the ones that fall into depression?
    They are usually the the ones where stress is almost too much to bare so they isolate themselves and have trouble with their families.
    So to those that just have to have some scientific answer fine dive into that rabbit hole be my guest but I warned you.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 06-17-2016 at 09:44 PM.
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  19. #19
    Silver Member Meghan4now's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    Yep. It's in your genes. Nothing else makes sense. Blue eyes, red hair, being gay... it's in the genes.
    There is still no isolation to a specific gene or combination of genes that has been shown. This statement defies the scientific method, and therefore is invalid. I believe there COULD be genetic links for SOME crossdressers, or OTHER biological factors, which has more definite evidence. But a claim of GENETICS is still an opinion with little basis in science.

    On the lighter side, some made the joke last night that CDS wear dresses, and TS wear jeans. So what does it mean if I'm wearing skorts or capries?
    Last edited by Meghan4now; 06-17-2016 at 10:35 PM.
    Put on a Happy Face.

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    Everything I read here applies, in the genes, emulating childhood hereos, being myself, to be aroused (per sex addiction), to feel feminine, to address safety and security reasons (reacting to early child/ sibling abuse)....I'm sure there is more but at the end of the day I want to feel I did the best I could to take care of my emotional well being and CDing accomplishes that.

  21. #21
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    Sibling abuse I find that funny in a way.
    If you had older brothers and sisters it was pretty much part of growing up they were going to tease you,beat you up (in your mind),not let you hang out with them etc.
    It was part of growing up and you had to deal with it.
    Do I think it may have contributed to my being gay and wearing womens clothes, being a CD and being TG ? No of course not.
    Why is it we feel the need to blame what we do on someone else that had nothing to do with it.
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  22. #22
    Aspiring Member Mykaa's Avatar
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    Im sure there are various reasons for different people, Me? I like it or I wouldnt do it. I do get a charge from it, I feel good, I like the fit, the feel, I can relax, I can destress, I enjoy looking pretty/ nice however you want to relate that. Yes I have been drawn to it from a very young age.
    Mykaa is me! Discovering Peace throughout from the Girl within.
    David Bowie "Don't stay in a sad place Where they don't care how you are..."
    Disturbed The Light "The truth is waiting there for you to find it
    It's not a blight, but a remedy"

  23. #23
    Oh to be an English Rose Jane G's Avatar
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    The only answer is 42.

    Another who has dressed from a young age. I have come to the conclusion I wanted to be like my sisters when I was young. Then got hooked on the fun. I thought for years I was a girl in a boy’s body. Only changed that view a few years ago. These days I go with the female admirer scenario. Whatever it's a whole lot of fun and only adds to my personality and my life.
    Last edited by Jane G; 06-18-2016 at 09:33 AM.

  24. #24
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    I think it varies from person to person. From wanting t be like a female friend or family member, to finding a magic box of girl stuff to have a sister or cousin think you are their dress up doll, these thing are some of the triggers. Overall it think the maybe a genetic predisposition to gender bending.
    Sara

  25. #25
    Silver Member daviolin's Avatar
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    I stopped wondering about why. I just do it because It's the right thing to do. For me anyway. Daviolin
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    A CD AND HIS WARDROBE, ITS A BEAUTIFUL THING.

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