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Thread: Please Be Careful if You Go Out

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member Cristy2's Avatar
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    Please Be Careful if You Go Out

    Not sure where I should be posting this. However, last night June 24,2016 my T-girlfriend, Amber, was attacked outside a night club in St. Augustine, Fl and was severely beaten. No one knows what the provocation for the attack was and the perpetrator or perpetrators were not caught, which is no surprise for St. Johns County Florida. Robbery was ruled out because she had nearly $300 cash in her purse and he purse was not bothered in the attack.

    Amber is doing okay today. Just scraped and bruised up a lot.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member Fiona123's Avatar
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    Hate crime. Very shameful. I know it's a cliche but an attack on one of us is an attack on all of us. Please give my best wishes to Amber. 🌈🌺

  3. #3
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    Cristy,
    That's bad news and very hard on Amber, she must be really shaken up, so good to hear she's on the mend, lets just hope they do catch the attackers.

    None of us should ignore messages like this, it can happen anywhere, what fuels a person to make such attacks is worrying, sometimes they are almost without motive which is more worrying because no one is safe.

  4. #4
    Silver Member NancySue's Avatar
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    I'm so sorry about what happened to Amber. Hope her recovery is fast. I believe society still isn't ready for us, consequently we all have to be extremely careful if you go out and where you go. We've found shopping centers easy to pass. We strive to look like "ordinary" shoppers. No excessive make up, high heels, tight pants, etc. My frustration is I love to wear hose (of all kinds). This is not the current fashion...sad. Yes, be very careful. Nancy Sue

  5. #5
    Member Liz57's Avatar
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    Please send my wish for quick recovery to Amber. Unfortunately, the mental scars may take longer to heal.

    This sounds especially scary to me since I have a house a half hour from there and have been venturing out en femme recently and considering St. Augustine as a place to stroll along the beach and blend in with the public. Guess I'd better play it safe for awhile.

    Unfortunately, evil seems to bred evil.

    Liz

    PS Thanks for posting

  6. #6
    Pink Panther paintmepink's Avatar
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    That's terrifying. Did she not have an personal protection?
    Last edited by Nigella; 06-26-2016 at 02:25 AM. Reason: Discussion of this item is banned

  7. #7
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    Sorry to hear about Amber Cristy.
    Glad she is mending up.
    Think about personal protection because this was a wake up call.

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member Cristy2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by paintmepink View Post
    That's terrifying. Did she not have any personal protection?
    No and I'm not sure, by the sounds of it, that it would have done her any good because, in her own words, she never knew what hit her. She said she was walking across the parking lot and didn't see anyone or anything amiss and next thing she knew she was on the ground surrounded by a huge crowd of people and a police officer asking if she was okay.

    I'm going to take her to get a certain item of self-defense when she is feeling up to it.
    Last edited by Nigella; 06-26-2016 at 02:26 AM. Reason: Quote edited to remove banned topic

  9. #9
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    That is very bad news. I have been hoping to go out on Tuesday evenings alone. When a person is blindsided, no personal protection is much good. A whistle is good, but if you are knocked out, its of no use. A real bummer. Hope Amber recovers soon.
    Last edited by Nigella; 06-26-2016 at 02:26 AM.

  10. #10
    Curmudgeon Member donnalee's Avatar
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    Cristy, I am so sorry that this happened to your friend.

    The most important safety tool you can have is an ability to read the street. You need to be constantly aware of your surroundings, who is there and what they are doing. Does anything seem out of place? Does what is going on make sense?

    I know I have posted this many times, but it cannot be stressed enough.
    ALWAYS plan for the worst, then you can be pleasantly surprised if something else happens!

    "The important thing about the bear is not how well she dances, but that she dances at all." - Old Russian Proverb (with a gender change)

  11. #11
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    Cristy,

    I'm sorry to hear about Amber and hope her recovery is quick and complete.

    I recommend doing some research and comparison shopping prior to any self defense purchases. Also, and even more importantly is training. Simple one hour or afternoon training courses are only a start. Self defense has to become a mind set where you always maintain situational awareness. As you said, Amber didn't know what hit her so no matter what , she never would have had the opportunity to use anything.

    Good Luck
    Last edited by Shelly Preston; 06-26-2016 at 12:21 PM. Reason: Certain subjects are not allowed

  12. #12
    Banned Read only LisaJ1's Avatar
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    This is why I don't go out alone and I have been through it.I had a guy attempt to put his hand up my skirt once this year.I gave him a good kick in the genitals and he was hurting very good.I was not alone when this happened too.My fiancé and a couple friends were with me when it happened.

  13. #13
    Member Molly James's Avatar
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    Hi Cristy,

    I'm horrified to hear of this attack on Amber & hope she gets well soon.

    Molly.
    Last edited by Molly James; 06-26-2016 at 11:20 AM.

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    What Linda Woodworth said.

  15. #15
    Aspiring Member Cristy2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by donnalee View Post
    The most important safety tool you can have is an ability to read the street. You need to be constantly aware of your surroundings, who is there and what they are doing. Does anything seem out of place? Does what is going on make sense?
    Exactly! Even if you are in an accepting area of town. Amber was in a very LGBT accepting area of town and was still attacked.

  16. #16
    Silver Member paulaprimo's Avatar
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    such a horrible story Cristy, i wish Amber a speedy recovery.
    i just don't get it...people whom don't understand us are so quick to say that
    we need help, when we hurt no one.
    paula

  17. #17
    Member josrphine's Avatar
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    Hi Cristy, I have a time share up in St Augestine on A1A Beach club. Have never had any problems so then is news to me. Will be carful in the future ?

  18. #18
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    Of course one should be aware of one's surroundings regardless of attire and while this may have been a targeted attack, it is also possible that it was just an attack. This can happen anywhere to anyone, again, regardless of attire. Being out alone, presumably late, is not the best choice.

    Do not let this be a deterrent to going out if you want to go out. DO let this be a reminder as to where and when you go out.

  19. #19
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    Jennifer.....What? An assault outside a night club? Purse or cash not taken? No apparent attempt at sexual assault? Amber stumbled across some irate people who felt emboldened by either alcohol or group dynamics to tell her she was not welcome on their turf. It was a hate crime. My only recommendation I have for anyone contemplating going out en femme to a nightclub is to check it out en drab to see what the presumed undercurrents are within the place.

  20. #20
    Aspiring Member Cristy2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by josrphine View Post
    Hi Cristy, I have a time share up in St Augestine on A1A Beach club. Have never had any problems so then is news to me. Will be carful in the future ?
    It is always good to be careful, but don't let Amber's attack scare you. St. Augustine is known to be very LGBT accepting.

    Stephanie, St Augustine, Fl is very LGBT accepting especially in the area of town where Amber was at. It is very unusual to full blown unheard of for any member of the LGBT community to be violently attacked in St. Augustine.

  21. #21
    Little Mrs. Snarky! Nadine Spirit's Avatar
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    I agree with Jennifer. Things happen and sometimes they suck. Yeah, it appears as though it most likely was a hate crime. But still things happen. Nobody can ever be 100% safe 100% of the time.

    Honestly, if after being out 1000s of times, something happens once, what does that mean about the probability of it happening?? Its super low. And if you are afraid because something might happen, stay out of cars. Generally speaking that tends to be humans highest risk activity, but most people don't ever worry about that.

  22. #22
    Banned Read only LisaJ1's Avatar
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    I was lucky and coming towards my recovery.The man that attempted to put his hand up my skirt in Febuary was convicted of sexual assault and serving a 20 year sentence based on his record.I am seeing a therapist that deals with sex crimes,Therapist says I am doing great now.

  23. #23
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    I think it was a hate crime and at a nightclub one needs to have eyes in the back of their head. Yes we need to look for danger. As we all know it might even be good for us to be able to protect ourselves, but mace might be better lol when you are in heels. But always scan for danger and be aware of your surroundings and always try to go to safe places than night clubs. But hey i know night clubs are fun... right!
    Part Time Girl

  24. #24
    I am me! TrishaTX's Avatar
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    All I can say is sorry..it is sometimes the way of the world
    No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.

  25. #25
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Attackers don't attack for no reason. Maybe the assailant drank too much booze and didn't take meds, who knows? We can take measures to protect ourselves, but when getting sucker punched there is nothing that one can do to retaliate. Although Amber is doing OK physically, there has to be some mental anguish over this incident. Time heals...
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

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