Feels weird when I crossdress
Hi there everyone can some please give me any advice every time I crossdress I mean completely clothes,makeup,wig,etc I still feel like a man I don't seem to be able to change myself mentally can anyone give any advice if they have experienced this thanks.
Who says we have to change mentally really? Just have fun and enjoy it. That's what I do.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
First off the one thing you should not feel is weird. To dress is a beautiful thing to do and experience. When I am out I have to concentrate very much on a feminine walking style so changing mentally when dressed in one way may not be required, it is as one feels within themselves. Also do you feel pretty when dressed, I do very much so.
I haven't had the chance yet to do the full dress with makeup and wig and i am not sure what i will feel like when its all said and done and i look back into the mirror...what i do know is that i have waited so long to do this...and to just get to that point willl be such a huge relief. I do not expect to feel like a woman in womans clothes...i just want to feel what all woman feel when they look in the mirror after the time and effort they put in...and say hey, i look pretty damn good. Dont have expectations...its the best advise i can give you...just enjoy the moment...enjoy your efforts...the rest will fill in based on that. Have fun!
Well, you still are a man. So what's to change?
I'm a dude 100% of the time. When I'm dressed, I do not "become" a woman nor do I identify as one. I am a cross dresser. Isn't that what you are was well?
I think it has more to do with you being comfortable dressed. Do you like what you see?.I remember the first time going dressed to see my therapist and I was so nervous. The next time it was not such a big deal and she even mentioned how I seemed much more comfortable. I realized then that I am still the same person on the inside no matter how I present myself to the outside world
It takes a lot of effort to crossdress "completely," why do you do it? There must be something that's driving that behavior, right? What is that? If crossdressing is filling some need for you, then examine that need and why it's apparently not being fulfilled when you don't crossdress. In the end you can only feel like you, right? You can't know what other gender identities feel like because you only have you to draw on. So it's not surprising that you don't feel like someone else. I think the trick is to feel more like you.
I love this discussion because it really is the core of everything we do as a crossdresser and I'm going thru a stage now that I'm completely comfortable dressed. I can't explain it but I do seem to see myself as a woman but just as Jennifer says I'm not I'm a man but I for some reason when I'm fully out I do feel like a women.
I do understand feeling weird I think we all go through that but after a time it will go away
Not sure why you would want to 'change yourself mentally'. Or do you simply want to feel like you're a woman because you currently don't feel right about wearing the clothes?
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I don't know of I "feel like a woman" in any sort of scientific sense. Obviously, never having been a genetic woman, I can't know what that really feels like, but I can tell you that there is a feeling that I get when I settle into girl mode, and it is distinctly different than how it feels to be in boy mode ... and that this feeling is deeply connected to my soul in fundamental, inescapable ways.
I think it's as much a mental state as it is about how I'm presenting and what I see in the mirror. Sometimes I will get dressed and not have that feeling ... that is usually when I am feeling highly paranoid or stressed ... but given about an half hour or so to "settle in" it always feels like ... well ... wonderful.
If you're feeling wierd when you dress ... maybe you just need to give yourself some time to settle in? On the other hand, if it's always felt wierd for you ... why do you still do it?
"Why shouldn't art be pretty? There are enough unpleasant things in the world." -Pierre-Auguste Renoir
I don't know if this is what OP meant, but I know when I first dressed fully for the first few times it was awkward. It felt kind of like I was wearing a mask I wasn't meant to wear. Like I was trying to be someone I wasn't meant to be.
For me this came down more to worrying about societies standards and what others would think of me, but it was definitely an uncomfortable feeling. I was very self-conscious when I was younger and always worried what others thought.
Once I stopped caring what others might think and started doing my own thing because I that's what I wanted that quickly changed. I no longer feel awkward even going out in public dressed and I don't have to be fully dressed down to makeup and all and love and embrace my feminine side.
Its not about feeling like anything but yourself. We must stop trying to fit ourselves into the one thing we are trying to escape: The gender-binary.Originally Posted by Megan.
You don't change mentally, that is what ever it is. The fact that you realize that seems to straighten your choice of CROSSDRESSING, it isn't a magic pill. It's something we do because we like and/or enjoy. It may grow into something more as time goes on but it is what you make of it mentally and physically with practice and resolve. Patience and acceptance is the Key to enjoying it. The anticipation and "Rush" is what fuels my own continued Dressing, always has and still does. So in short if you enjoy it and want to do it, think it through and then do it. Understanding or justification is optional not required. Trying to reason or even rationalize CDing is a hindrance and will drive some people crazy, for in the end it doesn't matter it's a personal thing unless you decide to share it. Simply put Enjoy and Get over the Why Crap. Oh one more thing do yourself a favor and don't fall into the what am I or labels game, you are what you are a man in a dress enjoying what ever it "is." No more no less as long as you keep it real.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Fran
It's worth something just being around to Fuss!
Megan,
It depends what your CDing is based on and what your needs are ! I feel I'm fulfilling the needs of the female part of me but I don't become a female, part of me is content being dressed but the man is still there , mentally he'll never go away he just looks different. The voice doesn't change, some of the mannerisms may do , it is more than an act , it's allowing your female side to come out into the open.
Franlee,
I'm not sure I agree with your blanket statement about just being a man in a dress , some of us have been through counselling so we do have to accept some labels, I know I have GD and I'm bi-gender, so there is a little more to it than just a guy in a dress.
Last edited by Teresa; 07-21-2016 at 07:20 PM.
When I partially dress i.e. panties, bra, hose, which is most of the time, I am a guy who simply enjoys the comfort of whatever I've chosen to wear that day. However, when I dress completely, yes it takes time, especially if you do all the things a woman does, it seems to trigger my feminine side. I have a supportive wife who I watch and try to simulate her motions, walking, sitting, primping, etc. She offers suggestions for which I try to copy. It takes a lot of practice, which is enjoyable. We laugh about our similarities and differences. She hates underwire bras...I love them. She won't wear pantyhose...I love to wear stockings, thigh highs & pantyhose regardless of the weather. Our joke..."I can't wait to put on what she can't wait to take off. Her definition of "comfort" is 180 degrees from mine. So, who knows? Do what makes you happy. Someday, your feelings may change....or may not.
I'm not sure I just feel the need to do it but am not very comfortable when I doIt takes a lot of effort to crossdress "completely," why do you do it? There must be something that's driving that behavior, right? What is that? If crossdressing is filling some need for you, then examine that need and why it's apparently not being fulfilled when you don't crossdress. In the end you can only feel like you, right? You can't know what other gender identities feel like because you only have you to draw on. So it's not surprising that you don't feel like someone else. I think the trick is to feel more like you.
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I am always worrying about what people think of me I am very self conscious
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I do it because I like to look pretty but something always feel wrong
I'm in the camp that cross dressing is outwardly expressing internal feelings, period. The desire to transform or transition is an extension of that. Some of us have it stronger than others, some to the point where the disconnect is debilitating.
I dress to allow a self image to flourish. It is a repudiation of some of the image messages I put out due to my gender, size and strength.
I will admit that I have never gone 'the full monty' and shaved, donned forms and tried to appear female. I *think* because I'm believe it would not look in the slightest bit convincing. That does not stop me from wearing women's clothes, it just stops me from trying to tell an unconvincing story.
- Kitty / Moose
- Madame Moose - on my way to Anne
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"I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And when I am for myself, what am 'I'? And if not now, when?" - Hillel the Elder
See, I get the exact opposite feeling. It didn't start out that way; for the first few months I think, I always felt more as if I was simply learning to do what I should have been doing all along, it evolved into feeling like I only felt normal when I WAS dressed as a girl. And that's where I am today.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
If you are dressing to 'escape' being a male, even if it's for a short time, Relax, enjoy the feminine clothing while you are dressed. Truth is, you cannot escape being male mentally, the most you can hope for is being happy with where you are at the time. To fight it is to lose the battle right off.
When I dress I feel feminine, I don't feel male. Also, while there is a sexual component, I also have feelings of contentment and "rightness." Have fun and enjoy it -- that's good advice!🌺👗
That's how I feel now, but the anxiety of worrying about someone finding out and my psychological state at the time made it very hard to feel that way at the beginning. But you have to realize, I felt that way with a lot of things when I was younger.
I've always been smaller and never really been into sports or typical guy stuff, so I was picked on a lot as a kid. A lot of it was just because I was small and not as masculine as a kid, a lot of kids made fun of me just for being small and in gym classes there were plenty of times the jock kids didn't want me on their team because "I was as useless as a girl", so when it came to dressing it amplified those anxieties. Triggering thoughts like "maybe they're right and something IS wrong with me".
It took a lot of time and and a lot of work before I became a strong enough person to say this is who I am and everyone else can screw off. Now that I can do that I feel more comfortable as my feminine self and feel like I'm putting on a mask when I go to work as a guy or have to dress as a male for a family event and such.
Nothing wrong with your feelings about being a man when you are crossed dressed. I am a man all the time I am dressed. I just enjoy wearing women's clothing and find it fun to do. For me, it is just that simple to explain and understand about my motivations for doing so. I just enjoy wearing women's clothes.
I wish my wife could enjoy me being happy in this regard..... 👙👗👠💅🏻💄💋
When you do dress completely, do you look in the mirror and still see a 'man in a dress" or do you see the woman you always hoped to look like? You say you like to look pretty but something is wrong. Can you explain what you feel is wrong?
I don't change mentally but do feel happy to express my inner desires in an outward appearance. You may feel guilty about having to hide this from others, but that is to protect them due to their misunderstanding and fears, not from something bad you are doing.
Hugs, Ellen
I have no change in mentality either when I dress. I only have a feeling of comfort and relaxation.
Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned
im not sure i think i look pretty good but my self confidence is very low and always has been i think deep down it is my self confidence.
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