I apologize as I bet this has been asked times before . I was interested in your take on why feel the need to dress and feel femme ? As this is a question have battled with all my life .
I apologize as I bet this has been asked times before . I was interested in your take on why feel the need to dress and feel femme ? As this is a question have battled with all my life .
We just do, there is no answer to that, just accept that it's part of who we are, don't torture yourself with the why's.
I don't know if any of you have had this experince , but I was told that I was a gril when i was born an lived my begnning yrs as a girl. I latter in life 5 o 6 became a boy.. This I thing is the reason that I am half female. Jo
Hi Bianca,
I think of I could answer that question I would have a bright future as a therapist. I don't know why, I'm just wired that way and have chosen to accept, embrace and enjoy that aspect of my life.
Beth
Last edited by Elizabeth G; 08-02-2016 at 06:22 AM. Reason: Typo
I don't believe there is one answer. We all have different live experiences. Different genetics or just like being unique.
I is like understanding our wives & girlfriends.
Sara
It's who we are. We all have different levels of what we like,how we feel, what makes us happy. It's who we are...
Yes, the question has been asked perhaps hundreds of times. For whatever reason, there's an underlying desire to self identify as female, or perhaps there's some connection to the clothing to feelings of comfort or perhaps sexual excitation for those who do it for that purpose alone. The reason it's so difficult to pin down, is mostly because of the huge assumption that it's an indication that we may possibly have homosexual desires, and in most societies, we have grown up being told that to be feminine in any way at all is the worst possible thing that a boy can be. Consider all the insults that people can use against us, and it's those that indicate we might be female that are the worst. , weak sister, fairy, throws like a girl, etc., other people, especially (but not limited to) men will use these words to hurt us the most. One of the amazing things is how much women will do the same thing, while apparently ignorant to the fact that they are denigrating themselves as well by using feminine adjectives as an insult.
Some like to just say that they were born this way, and leave it at that. Some like to create a fictitious female persona and assign their female feelings and thoughts to that, in an effort to distance themselves from anything feminine lest any one, especially themselves, accept that those feminine things are really part of their own personality. All because of the rampant homophobia in our culture.
So, does wanting to dress up like a female always come from some hidden, unknown cause? Nope. Read the link in my sig and discover how you can take a normal little boy and with the right circumstances, create a crossdresser, no genetics, no drugs involved.
Last edited by Lorileah; 08-02-2016 at 12:50 PM. Reason: If you have an issue with how the site functions contact Admin and if you have to use symbols don't use the word
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
Growing up around sisters and being the youngest and, always in the company of my mother, I was immersed in the world of everything female.
I'm definitely a male and I just operated on the desire to be around woman by breaking through the social taboo to just experience being the object of my own desire.
And yes, it is as simple as that.
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
Hi Bianca, Welcome to our forum, When you are here you are home.
Whatever your question is there is a 99.785 % chance that someone will have an answer for you.
WHY do I Dress, It's just who I am , And it's just what I do......
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
I've been asking "why?" since I tried on my first pair of stockings. In college, my major was motivational psych looking for answers. Over the years, I've read books from the library, articles on the Internet, etc. My conclusion is that it's an additional genetic personality compulsive behavior pattern that we have and others don't. Under the column of absolutes like death and taxes, you can add our needs to the list. I've quit worrying about the "why" and have accepted it for who I am. I have no regrets for the time spent searching for the "why". Life will go on, so, I turned lemons into lemonade. I'm fortunate to have a wife who doesn't understand this part of me either, but helps and supports me. Our "secret" has definitely strengthen our relationship. I've traveled the road from one article to having everything I need and the freedom to express myself. Are the urges and needs still there? Simple answer, "Yep". Now let's see, ummmm what will I wear today? 👠💄👗.
Because all males have a female side and all females have a male side!! Most will not admit to it but it is true! Estrogen and testostrogen are found in both sexes. Despite our actual physical sex we have both hormones! We (crossdressers and transgender persons) feel the need to see the other side! Some like the other side so much that they stay there. Some to the point of surgery to become the other side. Crossdressers and transgender persons, as many have said, are "wired" that way (a brain thing)!! Hope this helps answer your question! Hugs Lana Mae
To answer your question for me when I was 3 or 4 and playing with a little girl my age for some reason I suggested we trade shoes. Hers were patten leather with a strap and 100% feminine. When I put them on at that early age a sexual electricity went through me, it was such a good feeling when she wanted her shoes back I didn't want to take them off. At that moment I became a crossdresser. So to point blank answer your question I was born with the desire to be feminine and the clothes that go with it. I have always been drawn to girl clothes especially lingerie. Women dressed just look so nice, neat, attractive and all of the clothes that are available to them just fit them so nice. Then; a nicely dressed curvy woman definitely has a drawing power for both men and women, just look at the women on Fox News. Just wish society would accept gender blending in dressing.
I can't explain why I crosdress. For me there is a sexual component and beyond that dressing just makes me happy. I do not ask why any more. I just dress whenever I have the opportunity. That's me. 🌺
Bianca,
I'm afraid you will have to deal with it for the rest of your life, so at some point you have to find out why, what makes you tick and come to terms with it. Most of us are born like it, call it a female trait if you like , it has needs which you need to satisfy , if you don't it will just get worse. Mine is sexually based and it's a continuous feeling , no ebb and flow like some, it's taken me far too long to realise all this so now I'm trying to enjoy what Cding does for me. My wife still doesn't want to know but she does accept it's a need I have to satisfy so she accepts I do go out to social meetings. Most of her fears have gone but she's never going to participate , I accept that now and work round her for my own sake and sanity.
I don't care who knows because whatever the say or do isn't going to change what's inside my head, this is a part of me that has as much of a need as my male side, sometimes more so.
I never really wondered why and now I don't care. I love the clothes, and how I feel wearing them, and that's enough for me.
It is because we are born this way. No different than having blue eyes or being strait or gay.
For some of us its just the way we are.
Trying to find a concrete answer is not likely to happen and to obsess over the hows and whys will only drive you crazy and send you down a huge rabbit hole.
Last edited by Tracii G; 08-02-2016 at 09:25 AM.
Speaking for myself, it is an outward expression of what I feel within myself. If you have a wife, or have had girlfriends, do you stop and wonder why they grow their hair a certain way, or why they color the nails? Wear whatever it is they are wearing? It is their outward expression of themselves. I as acrossdresser feel similarly, at least physically.
Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned
Hard, hard question to answer, and I might give different answers at different times. Sometimes there is a sexual element to wearing womens clothes, sometimes it is comforting, and mostly that deep down inside I identify as being female. I guess that is the main one
Thank you all so much for your answers they have helped and is an amazing feeling knowing I'm not the only one and hope one day to be as happy and confident in myself as you seem xx
Bianca,
You are not the only one to wonder "Why?" . It is probably the subtext to most of the threads on this site but unfortunately there are no clear answers to this fundamental question. Nature? Nurture? or a bit of both. We just don't know.
I don't bother to worry about the question any more and just enjoy being my self.
Bianca, Why? is the question that we get and nobody here has an answer for this. It is what it is. everybody here has different upbringing and experiences and there is no reason why. It is who you are and that is enough. Isn't it?
Part Time Girl
I hate to use a cleshay but... I yam what's I yam, And that's all what's I am.
For me I just feel like myself when im dressed,dont know why or care why, I just feel more at home in a dress or skirt than I do in pants,