I believe my " case " is unique, But I want to know, How others cope with wanting to dress more but for whatever reason you cant. My story ; After my Divorce, I decided that it would be best to just sell the house ( Mostly because I could NOT afford Mortgage payments on one income ) And for the first time in 25+ years I became a Single Bachelor. If that wasn't enough to test my limits, I also had to become a renter for the first time in 5+ Years. A single bachelor/ renter, it seemed like overnight!! I had a real hard time dealing with that. The only real bonus was, All our children were grown up enough to make it on their own. I was a single Dad for 5 or so years, The youngest of our four children was 15 at the time of the Divorce. My oldest Son moved out of " The Family House " as did My Daughter , Who got Married Within 1 year. Anyway, After the youngest Son moved on with his life, And moved out, I was a Single Dad With an EMPTY NEST, and with no financial help to maintain the Home, I was forced to sell or lose the property to Forclosure.I sold as quickly as possible. Now I'm a Bachelor/Renter.It was ROUGH. But wait theres a light at the end of this tunnel !! I didn't make a real big profit from selling my dream home, My savings was depleted, My Ex was making plans to Marry the man who she cheated on me with, And My job required me to travel a surprisingly close path as her and that ( BLEEPITY BLEEP ) Man frequently " Carried on in " But despite that, My job was my only bright spot, Until I got brave enough to go through some of the boxes from the old house. I found my " Stash of Bras, Painties Etc. The Ex tried to accept my dressing desires, But eventually, it was not something she was able to get excited about So began my feelings of shame And packed it in the back of my storage And my soul.But there it was, And WOW, It woke up a side of me that I had hidden from for about 10 years! Long story short, I became obsessed with exploring my female side again. I went out in pubic, And eventually to some Crossdresser friendly bars and really enjoyed my new life, For about 6 months. Looking back, I think it was an escape from the fact that for over half of my life, She ( My Ex ) and Our Children Were my life. I saw her AND HIM, Every day, Every where I went, Because of my Job, I seemed to be in places she and I shared and some that her and I called " Our special places " But now she was there with HIM. The Company I was working for lost several contracts, I lost a big portion of my Income, And I just decided one morning while drinking my Coffee, That's it! I'm outta here! I got my training, Turned in my" Notice " sold most of my remaining possessions and became a Truck Driver. I haven't been back to Sacramento, Ca. In 14 years! However, I didn't like being " Cooped up " in a truck 10 months out of the year, So I came " Home " to Montana. I've been back for about 11 years, And now I'm LITTERALLY unable to leave, Mostly because I haven't the funds Or anywhere else to go. But as much as I love this State, If I were to admit I have a Female side, I would be TARRED AND FEATHERED!!! I live with ANTI EVERYTHING roomates, And in a ANTI EVERYTHING Society. I'm not critical of Christian beliefs, But these folks are so CLOSED MINDED, That I think , For the most part, I would be wise to stay in my closet. I have heard some HORRENDOUS ideologies about what should be done to ANYONE who even APPEARS to be, What most in this particular area consider to be gays. I have not been afforded the opportunity to get all dolled up in 12 years.How do you cope with simular life situation. If you have to go through something like I live ?