wanna be more passsable....👗

[jennifer0918]

Any pointers on how to look more passable? I'm big guy,so should I loose more weight ?I enjoy lifting weights so kinda a muscular, it's driving me crazy I would give anything to be 5'7" 125 lbs but that's not the case.Any ideas will help.thanks

[suzanne]

Big guy here, too. The first advice I got was sleeveless dresses with a cardigan or bolero to soften the arms and shoulders. Same for tops to pair with skirts. I find its easier to find separate skirts and tops than dresses that fit me right everywhere.

Shop in person. Dressed or drab, makes no difference. The expertise of a professional sales assistant is invaluable. The immediate feedback of using the fitting rooms saves tons of time, money, hassle and wardrobe failures. Do not shop online. Become a regular at the stores you like. It's better when you and the staff get to know each other's thoughts and tastes.

The next part works for me, but might not for you. Don't try to pass as a woman. No wigs,forms or makeup. Own who you are. A guy in a skirt who has good taste and knows how to put together a tasteful, age appropriate outfit. As I say, you may not feel comfortable doing as I do, but it does work. With my size and voice, there's no possibility of passing so any attempt to do so just looks terrible.

Hope this helps in some way. Good luck.

[Kelly Whelan]

I'm reasonably stocky too.

Google around for reverse pyramid shape tips. Here's a link I keep for myself. Granted, it's for women to consider and they use celebrities as their examples, but the fundamentals still apply, more so perhaps for us. It's all about drawing attention away from your male indicators - broad shoulders etc, and getting people to look down your centre line, feet or accentuated hips.

[Jessica May]

The first advice I got was sleeveless dresses with a cardigan or bolero to soften the arms and shoulders. Same for tops to pair with skirts. I find its easier to find separate skirts and tops than dresses that fit me right everywhere. .

Exactly, I have broader shoulders and I think this helps a great deal. As for shopping at stores you are probably right but I have had good luck with online shopping too

[Krisi]

If you have broad shoulders, you should try to make your hip padding as large as practical to keep your proportions as feminine as possible. Asymmetrical breast forms will help to make your shoulders look narrower.

For any of us to look passable, it's important to dress appropriately for the time and place. Forget the mini skirt and six inch heels, dress like the women do.

[Lana Mae]

i have ordered every thing online and have been mostly successful but you have to use size charts and each store as they are not universal!! Example: normally size 20W but at some stores 18/20W is a L and others is 2X, very confusing but like I said watch the size charts!! And like Krisi says, drop mini skirts go to midi or maxi and if tall drop really high heels!!! Most Genetic females are wearing kitten heels or flats!! The hint about jacket or wrap to cover shoulders is correct!! Good luck on your journey!! Hugs Lana Mae

[MonikaTirola]

I agree with finding clothes to work with an inverted triangle aka strawberry shape.

As for the head: I am learning a make up technique called "highlighting and contouring" and it does wonders if done right.
Gluing your eye brows over and/or a temporary face lift with tape can also yield good results

[Alice_2014_B]

I fortunately have a small frame and, from what I've been told by GGs in person, a nice butt.
One girl told me that on my last deployment and it's such a confidence booster.

Best advice will be from others with your size frame, unfortunately that excludes myself.

But in general a good smile goes a long way.

[Alexa CD]

This is a hard one because I'm not your size and shape, I couldn't even tell you how to dress normally. I only really know how to go about it with people who are similar to me. Depending on physique clothing choice and hair removal can only do so much, I guess losing weight would probably help but muscle mass would also have to go to a degree. Sounds like that's not really an option though. Some of us definitely have it easier than others, I'm not that far off your ideal height and weight.

[MichelleDevon]

My own view would be positively to avoid sleeveless tops/dresses because they leave your muscular arms and shoulders clearly visible. Go for emphasising the waist and hips - they are presumably fairly trim relative to shoulders. The aim should be to direct viewers' gaze to the good bits rather than drawing attention to more obviously male features. I would certainly recommend shopping in person and asking for advice from sales assistants - be honest about what you are wanting and they will be happy to help. I think I would tend to go for something fairly loose-fitting but add a belt to pull in the garment below the bust line, maybe a fit and flare style of dress.

[docrobbysherry]

Passing is one thing. Looking good, another.

When I really want to pass I cover up ASAP. Wear loose clothing. Bland cut and colors. Try not to stand out.

When I want to look good, I try to look hot. And, most everyone notices me so passing is impossible!

[Jodi]

To be presentable--buy the best wig you can afford and get it professionally fitted. A cheap, ill-fitting wig shouts "man in a dress".

Get a good professional makeover and invest in some good makeup that matches your skin tone. Practice, practice, practice with makeup application.

jodi

[Paula_56]

The woman was stunning, enjoying a classic feminine beauty that seemed effortless. She moved with an elegant charm in an ivory colored suit, her heels tapped musically as she exited the elevator leaving behind a delicate floral scent. Most men would desire her I desired to be like her.


A few weeks later I was in Lord and Taylor I saw it, the most beautiful ivory suit on a mannequin. Paired with a pair of black pumps and purse it called out to me. I had to have it. I checked the rack looking for a size that fit me. The largest I found was a Misses size 16 but I wore a Women’s size 24. I bought the size 16, I don’t know why, but I had to have that dress. It didn’t fit, the skirt wouldn’t even go past my knees. It hung in my closet for three years sometimes I would take it out and hold it up and daydream.


Time had passed and I remember the day; the suit was ready back from the cleaners it hung there in a clear plastic bag. I was ready too, pantyhose, bra, spanx, hair and makeup. I took her from the hanger and opened the zipper on the skirt and stepped into it and pulled it over my hips, reaching behind, I heard the wonderful sound of “zzzippp!” as the skirt fit perfectly around my waist. As I slipped into the jacket the satin lining felt cool against my skin. As I worked the buttons closed the jacket hugged my hips seductively and proudly accented my bust. I sprayed a bit of perfume and then stepped into my shoes. When I turned toward the mirror there she was……. the women from the elevator. Although I was smiling a tear ran down my cheek.

In 2009 I turned 50 years old, and had reached the weight of 280lbs. I hated how I looked. I was a year or two away from high blood pressure and diabetes. My dreams of expressing my feminine side were slipping away. I was burdened with guilt, shame and self loathing.

Through the years I had worked so hard and sacrificed for so many things and for so many people in my life. Now at 50 the one thing I wanted most, the one thing that had nagged at me since childhood was going to be left unanswered. I couldn’t do it. I could not let it go. I needed to express that woman who I knew lived inside me. I may never transition but I needed to at least experience the world as a woman in some way.


I had no plan. I was still lost, but then one day during lunch I went to a local mall. I decided that I was going to buy makeup, a good quality foundation. I walked around the sleek and polished cosmetic counters in Lord and Taylor. I was feeling horribly out of place and self conscious. I walked up to the Lacome counter and stammered out a request for a foundation with heavy coverage. The sales associate told me that their foundations were very sheer, but asked me to wait a minute; she walked over to another kiosk and spoke briefly with another sales associate. Meanwhile I was turning red with embarrassment, I was sure they were shocked and appalled by my request. I fought the urge to bolt and run as I had done in earlier attempts. You see I was starting to get weary of making excuses and being afraid I had enough I wasn’t going to run anymore. I was going to stand up to that bully who lived inside of me.



From across the aisle, came a smile and a petite wave. Soon I found myself standing in front of an attractive young woman who was the manager of the NARS counter. Kasey, I would later learn her name, was pretty enough to be a model, her make-up true to her profession was artistically perfect. She quickly put me at ease and started to explain the different types of foundations available. For the first time in my life I spoke the truth openly about who I was. I told her that I was transgender and was starting to use makeup and wanted to develop a conservative business look for going out in the world. I didn’t know what to expect in return, I imagined the worst, disdain, scorn, condescension, but instead she responded with enthusiasm, and it was contagious. I listened intently to every word. Fifteen minutes later I departed and walked proudly back to the car carrying my cute little NARS bag with my new foundation. Best of all I felt good about my purchase; I didn’t feel guilty or shameful. For the first time in my life I felt acceptance.


About three weeks later I went back to the NARS counter. Still a bit apprehensive and uneasy about what my reception might be, I was relieved to be greeted by Kasey and a friendly smile. “Hey how’s the foundation working for you?” She then helped me pick out colors for my eyes and gave me advice on application. When she reached for her business card under the counter I noticed her lunch, a small container of soup, fruit and a bottle of water. As I walked away it dawned on me, if I wanted to look like a slender stylish woman then I needed to eat like one. I was a yo-yo dieter who always went back to a fat and bad carb based diet. It was what I was use to, and it was destroying me physically but also destroying any hope I had of stepping out into the world as a woman. This was an epiphany, it was at that moment where I associated and connected my diet with being feminine and achieving my dream. You see I wanted to dress as a woman, socialize as a woman, and be accepted as a woman. What I was saying was in all practical ways I wanted to live as a woman. I finally realized that along with the clothes, cosmetics, manicures, perfume and hair I also needed to include diet! Now anytime I reached for food I asked myself “What would a healthy woman eat?” Every time I made a correct choice it connected me a tiny bit to my feminine side. No longer was making a healthy choice an act of self denial, but instead it was self actualization and a step toward femininity. That realization made all the difference in my battle against weight.


As my weight started to drop and I built a wardrobe and I began to evolve as a woman. I started seeing a gender therapist and began to talk about my feelings openly. The guilt started to fade away. I began to accept the fact that I was transgender. I wasn’t doing anything wrong and I didn’t have to be ashamed of dressing as a woman. The world opened up to me.


What worked for me was simplicity. I live a busy life; my family has all kinds of foods, and busy schedules. I didn’t go out and buy all kinds of diet food. What I did was to start counting calories. Male bodies (unfortunately that’s what I’m working with here) burn 2000 calories a day if you don’t exercise. So I began slowly changing my diet. Here is an example, for breakfast instead of a cheese omelet, toast butter, and bacon. I’d have just eggs maybe some mushrooms, and a slice of toast with no butter. Then for lunch maybe some soup, and fruit, or a sandwich and some fruit. We not even up to 1000 calories yet. Dinner just a small piece of meat, lots of vegetables maybe some bread. The trick is to eat different foods get into a rhythm that acceptable for full time. Your hunger will diminish and you will begin to loose weight. On weekends I don’t go crazy but do enjoy nice dinners, pizza and maybe some beer.


Find an exercise that you can do regularly, if going to the gym is going to cause problems with your busy schedule then find a niche of time that you have free. I walk; I use to be a runner and laughed at walkers. But your research will tell you that the benefits of walking are close to running. Best of all I can do it anywhere, which means on the weekends I can hike the woods and during the week I can trek thru the office park. A half hour or an hour starts to slice off those 2000 calories.
Most important and listen closely here, if you don’t enjoy exercise you won’t keep it up. My walks are an escape, and I enjoy them, I feel as if something is missing if I don’t get that daily walk in.
The whole process is not rocket science, eat healthier food, keep it under 2000 calories a day and exercise.


The experts emphasize that diets don’t work that eating healthy does. I found a reason to eat healthy, something that gave me more satisfaction than feasting. Femininity.


Before and After

H1XSF5pm.jpg

[Helen_Highwater]

Jennifer,

Pumping iron and a femme figure are always likely to be at odds especially if we#re talking upper body strength. Having said that there's been great advice regarding wearing separates as opposed to dresses as you can mix and match to suit your differing measurement sizes. I would echo the advice of using hip/bum padding to even out the difference in hips and shoulders and of course it gives you a better defined waistline.

Paula's inspirational tale also highlights a crucial aspect. If you're body building and carrying excess weight then it's going to make being more passable harder. I'm carrying too much weight and trying to loose it as I know it will make my clothes fit better and improve my chances of creating a more convincing facial appearance if I can get my makeup up a notch.

[reinasblack]

Too look more like a woman you have to act more like a woman. To act like a women you have to enjoy and utilize the pluses of being a woman and adjust to the disadvantages.
Big square and are heavy triangular shoulders from body building and male puberty can be balanced with larger breast and a carefully selected wardrobe.

Let me explain.

Women/girls have much less of this hormone called testosterone.
We will call it T for short. T makes denser stronger bones ,bigger stronger muscles ,bigger wider feet,brow bridging are brow boxing,smaller lips,bigger stronger hands,flatter less pronounced buttucks and hips with more smoothing fat,less space between lips and nose,less space between eyelid and eyebrow,farther back hairline and widows peak sometimes, three male appendages that make tight shorts and dresses look like your wearing a tent on some occasions embarrassingly.
OK this is the short list!

Do not lift heavy instead take more trips because as a woman you don't have as much T.
Take smaller steps and takeup less space.you want to start working on your deportment and your outward projection.practice walking in spike high heels.
Take feminization coaching classes, learn and practice makeup skills,learn to do your feet and nails and make them soft.
Get a steel boned corset and set it for fabulous.
Get some hip and but pads and add breast forms. Arch your eyebrows and keep them neatly groomed.see a feminine image consulting already.
Shave your mustache, beard,legs,back,chest ,arms,hands,feet and bikini area.
POST A PHOTO EVEN IF IT'S WITH YOUR HEAD CHOPPED OFF FOR EVALUATION.front,back ,side profile along with your stats.

Practice practice oh and did i say practice....

[sometimes_miss]

Go with the 'Mrs. Doubtfire' look, and wear a jacket from a woman's roller derby team, with some kind of date indicating you were active in it around 1968. That'll explain the husky build, etc..

OR.....

There ARE big women in the world who are unmistakably female. Dot Marie Jones.png
If Dot Jones can pull it off, so can you.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0427963/?ref_=nv_sr_1

[CDTiffany]

OK Jennifer. first off. being a gorgeous T-girl Does not have anything to do with Height, Weight or any of that stuff.
I have had the pleasure of going out clubing with all types of beautiful crossdressers.
I am sure that you do have a wardrobe of some type. I think you goal should be to feel very feminine. Enjoy feeling that beautiful experience.
The world is yours. Welcome to the NEW!!!!! Welcome to this forum.
XOXO Tiffany Amber Rhoads.

[jennifer0918]

Thanks Tiffany

[Nicole Erin]

It is hard for us to say seeing how we have no clue what you look like. But going off nothing...

You will get a lot of suggestions on how to dress sure. Things like, wear long sleeves and/or a jacket. Maybe heavy padding. Maybe thick black tights to cover leg hair.
NOW let us examine the problem with those - It isn't exactly autumn weather outside. No, more like hot and humid, sticky... Does a long sleeve shirt still sound appealing? What about heavy padding? Won't those feel great in 90 degree humid weather. Thick tights? No way.

Plus like CDTiffany said - it isn't about height and weight. There really isn't much people can do about those things anyways. To think so would be to have that beginner frame of mind of "If I dress a certain way or wear some magical outfit, people will be fooled". We all thought that at one point.

So what if people "know" or not. If you are wanting to do this often and go out during the day to everyday places, you need to gain confidence to not care so much what others might think. And on that note - you would be surprised how many compliments you will get once you have a decent look and have the confidence to go with it. It almost gets annoying somehow...

I know "confidence" sounds like some easy or cliche answer but let me say - I have been living this full time for about 6 years now, even at work where I deal with the public (I see at least 100 people a day) and you know, I almost never get a negative reaction. Either they don;t mind or the ones that DO mind know they cannot shake my confidence. I do not even "pass" that well either.
On that note though - your ego will take a lot of blows before you can easily shake off the rude comments.

But if you want advice on how to visually pass better in the summer-

Stick with short sleeve blouses as opposed to tanks. Polyester/spandex blend shirts are the most comfy and have the most feminine look.
Grow your hair just enough so it could be masculine or feminine. Wigs are probably a pain but I dunno, never worn one.
Skirts tend to hide the lack of hips and are more comfortable than pants. A basic thinner material black skirt is a good option.
Choose heels maybe 1.5 to 2.5 inches. Easy to walk in and still give some "lift".
Use tweezers or an epilator to remove facial hair. The "shadow" is near impossible to get rid of with just shaving. Facial hair doesn't have to be 100% gone but the more the better.
Keep body hair in check.

If one is going to live this in public, a choice must be made - tone down the masculine traits as much as possible (like body hair) or wear God-awful hot clothing to cover it all up.

[jen_ross]

I am in the same boat since I work out and am big through the shoulders. I don't hold out hope of every going out in public, but I am happy dressing at home (and right now in a limited way). Maybe you could try a loose fitting top over a camisole or tank.

[Jenniferathome]

Any pointers on how to look more passable? ...

Jennifer, to what end? What is "more" and what do you think it gets you?

1'm 5'7 and weigh 150 lbs. I'm an athlete. My body looks more "Female East German Swimmer" than typical woman. I dress to blend in but in no way do I pass as a genetic woman. If there is a cross dresser who does, they are the proverbial one in million.

Buy and wear clothes that compliment your body. Spandex mini dresses may be out for you but they are out for the vast majority of actual women. Do some people watching....

[Tracii G]

Size and weight are things even women have issues with so thats not really a problem.
I've been very overweight at times and I just wore clothes that fit my frame and looked feminine.
Women come in all shapes and sized so work with what you have.
The trick is to remove any traces of the male you and accentuate the girl parts.

[reinasblack]

BOOM!


Sona Avedian Was a bald burly muscular man.

How you like Sonya Now!?

Comes now! The new Sona

Look now!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6HaVYg6kB4


http://www.people.com/people/mobile/...961272,00.html

[Kandi Robbins]

Most of us are big for women. I'm 5' 10". Very average by male standards, tall for a woman. You will never "pass" as has been stated here many times. I do not pass, no one thinks I am a woman. But I go out a few times a week, I have made GG friends that know and love me as Kandi, I belong to multiple groups as Kandi and no one thinks I am a woman. What I am is presentable, confident and pleasant to all I meet, open and honest about who I am. So I am accepted as a "one of the girls" by most even though it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to know I am male.

One thing I would suggest, if you are serious about this, change your workout routine. If you like to build muscle bulk, you can't look like both a man and a woman. I, too, lifted and enjoyed it. But I had a choice to make regarding my presentation. I now focus on cardio, building my legs and shaping my core. So I still workout and am in great shape, I'm just not building those defined, muscular arms that are 100% male.

[reinasblack]

Seeing you It would be easy to make you kandi Robbins look like a pretty woman even a pinup model the hard thing is changing your mannerisms and deportment.

You ever been to the Virtualfeminizationclinic/virtualfacialfeminizationclinic and see yourself?
I do not own the virtual site.

With Special effects makeup I would give you fatter more prominent cheek bones,jaw and chin contour,scalp advance,forehead lift(for eyebrows),Adams apple shave and neck contouring,skin peel and lip roll and maybe a lip/cheek/nose/chin implants.voice box surgery.

Breast ,hip and buttock implants with waist and back contouring. Because you body build i would give you D are DD breast implants to balance out your shoulders.hair extensions , makeup training and a new wardrobe because after this you don't look like a man at all even the slightest bit even with larger shoulders, hands and feet.


The end result is you would look like and sound like a super model.