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Thread: Ever had someone just seem to "know?"

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member Violetgray's Avatar
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    Ever had someone just seem to "know?"

    I was at a fantasy convention recently and there was a booth where they were painting faces and putting eyelashes on people for a small fee. I was walking by with a female friend and we started talking to the ladies at the booth. Then, one of them turned to me and said, with no irony or sarcasm "would you like some eyelashes put on?"

    Here's the thing: I wasn't presenting as a woman. As a male I didn't look particularly feminine either. But it seems perfectly reasonable to her to ask me, not the woman I was with, if I would like eyelashes.

    So my question is have you ever had someone just seem to "know," especially a stranger?

  2. #2
    Silver Member stephNE's Avatar
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    Hi Violet,
    When I'm in dude mode, I don't think I'm very feminine. But little things happen all the time that make me think that they know.
    Once a co worker showed me a picture of an ad for a sexy lingerie all-in-one, and she said "I think you would look good in this."
    I didn't know what to say back to her.
    Stephanie

  3. #3
    Reality Check
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    I would say you are making something out of nothing. They were there to make money selling eyelashes and you were taking up their time. The offer was to get you to spend money or move on. It was a bit of a joke on their part.

  4. #4
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
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    I went to a pharmacy recently to buy a few supplies, full on male mode. As I'm naturallly a quite shy person I asked for help choosing some cosmetics 'for my wife'. The very nice lady who served me discussed what I was buying and said to me, are these for you? Maybe she's served people like me before.....

  5. #5
    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
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    Maybe because NO ONE buys cosmetics for their wife. Might as well have said they were for your cat.

  6. #6
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    ha ha yep...happens to me all the time. I always go shopping with my girlfriend and we act pretending buying clothes for her sister that is my size and have no time for shopping. At the very end one day the girl came to me and whispered at my ear: "You will look good in these clothes..I know you are the sister...". It was funny and I felt happy with her comment.

  7. #7
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
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    Good point Paula, maybe it was a bit obvious!

  8. #8
    Silver Member Elizabeth G's Avatar
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    I recently stopped in to a small gift shop to pick up a scarf for my wife (and yes, this time it actually was for my wife). The shop owner immediately asked if it was for me. Mind you I was in full on chain-sawing-yard-working guy mode at the time, and it was clearly a woman's scarf. I just smiled and said not this time.

  9. #9
    Silver Member Tina_gm's Avatar
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    I think there are certain things about many of us, masculine dude mode or not that some, especially some women are intuitive about. I have felt this and experienced this myself on many occasions. Although in my case I tend to be a bit on the feminine side anyway, so it probably doesn't take a ton of intuition, probably just some casual observation.
    Chickens should be allowed to cross the road without having their motives questioned

  10. #10
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Maybe they caught you set one night. You are a huge YouTube star
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  11. #11
    tiptoeing thru the tulips ellbee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIANEF View Post
    I went to a pharmacy recently to buy a few supplies, full on male mode. As I'm naturallly a quite shy person I asked for help choosing some cosmetics 'for my wife'. The very nice lady who served me discussed what I was buying and said to me, are these for you? Maybe she's served people like me before.....
    Going to have go with Paula on this one. Always wondered how my cat's whiskers would look with a bit of mascara, ha!


    And hopefully you told the truth (that they were for you) -- as perhaps the SA really wanted to help get the best look for you?

  12. #12
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
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    Maybe she did! next time I go there will be no pretence, what I want is for me...

  13. #13
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Do you pluck your eyebrows? This is noticeable if someone presents male, especially if she is familiar with our community.

    And why would she ask you specifically and not your friend? It could be that if she is familiar with this community, she knows that its members are very interested in things that enhance a female appearance?
    Reine

  14. #14
    tiptoeing thru the tulips ellbee's Avatar
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    I'm still wondering if Violet got the eyelashes!

  15. #15
    happy and complete kkaye's Avatar
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    I was outed by a neighbor who saw me coming home with makeup still on. He knew then my S O, who has put the CD and makeup questions to me in every way.I have presented my crossdressing to her bit by bit but she is the type to not make a distinction between homosexuality and cross dressing.

  16. #16
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    Me personally, never have that I noticed.
    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

    -Home Movies
    (cartoon series)

    Shoe size: 9 US women's.
    Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
    Height: 5' 6".

  17. #17
    Senior Member Karen RHT's Avatar
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    While on a business trip out of town years ago, a cancellation allowed me to window shop at a mall just before lunch. Not something uncommon or uncomfortable for me to do, either for my wife or myself. Had a very nice skirt in my hands from the rack at the store entrance. It was discounted enough that I got thinking hmmm, maybe one for each of us. Very shortly after that thought entered my mind, a young SA approached and remarked "that one is a bit small for you, but I think we have one in your size." Her smile got even bigger when I replied "I likely need a 10."

    My wife wore a size 2 at the time, and she was in luck. No such luck for me, but I had fun with the SA while looking at a couple other styles of skirts with her.


    Karen

  18. #18
    Crossdresser Taylor186's Avatar
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    I've never received a knowing, wink, nod, smile or comment about being a crossdresser even when buying clothing or accessories or makeup for myself. I do assume some SAs have thought it. I do occasionally get clocked as gay though I have no physical or verbal tells (that I know of): but I'm not.
    Last edited by Taylor186; 09-02-2016 at 09:04 PM.

  19. #19
    New Member Zafira Skye's Avatar
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    Ever had someone just seem to "know?"
    Friends and colleagues at work often talk about their ‘gay-dar’ being activated off by someone they meet who hasn’t said anything in passing to indicate their sexual preferences. They confidently claim an uncanny ability to intuitively spot a gay person, not via mannerisms, or voice or the content of the conversation. Just that instinctive perception about an individual’s personhood and energy. The lesbians I have the privilege of knowing are so accurate in this discernment. I often wonder if these same people have a seventh sense called ‘cd-dar’ or ‘trans-dar”? Because I hide my crossdressing in the closet, I catch myself manning it up a little around them in my language, just in case. There is probably so much more about ourselves we transmit out into the ether of our world than we are fully aware of!

  20. #20
    Senior Member MissTee's Avatar
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    At the spa I frequent, I have a young (early 30's and very attractive) nail tech who treats me like one of the ladies. During one visit a companion nail tech struck up a conversation with me about all her gay friends. My tech kept looking up at me during the pedicure and we would girl giggle under our breathe about the conversation. I have little doubt she knows I dress as she HAD to notice the remnants of polish on my toes on numerous occasions, and I do believe she's got my number. She's never said anything about it, only treated me like someone special.

  21. #21
    Banned Spammer
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    Who doesn't know the famous Violetgray from You Tube fame?

  22. #22
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    Red face you can play along are it just might be a Test!

    Some women have fantasy and fetishes to dress a guy up in girl garb.

    they want him to look good to complete there fantasy/fetish.

    I know a few women who try guys to find them out.
    I was educating a group of women about fashion,beauty products,makeup and nail care.
    It kinda seems like they know but they also know i sell a lot of women's stuff too so that might be plausible why i know so much about womens stuff.
    Last edited by reinasblack; 09-03-2016 at 10:25 AM.

  23. #23
    Member stellatoo's Avatar
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    I once complimented a woman on her shoes and she responded with "men don't notice things like that, are you a crossdresser"?
    As I was being quiet about things then I denied it.
    "Slipping into stockings, stepping into shoes"
    The shortness of life prevents us from entertaining far-off hopes. From Horace’s Odes, Book 1,4

  24. #24
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    Violet, if you were at a fantasy convention I would think any thing goes. Isn't that the reason for the convention? To be something you're really not?

    As to sales associates selling obvious feminine products to men I think sales associates have had sufficient interactions to recognize there are very few men who feel comfortable buying undergarments and cosmetics for their wives and girlfriends. In the past I shopped for my wife, who at the time was a 34B and petite. There was no way what I would be buying was for myself. I would burst the seams if I tried the lingerie on. It was the same with outer clothing. The sales associates always made helpful suggestions.

    On the other hand if I did buy something that was really out of the ordinary for a man to buy for a woman, then I think the sales associate guessed right. Once I bought a Vanity Fair pull on shaper half slip. I had the display ad from the newspaper in hand with the size written on it. I did not fool anyone. The sales associate was qn older woman, who made the comment, "She gave to the ad and size? How convenient! with a smirk on her face. That was in the early 1980's. Really? How many men would buy that type of garment for their wives? Some..very few. Maybe a guy with a fetish to see his wife in girdles and long line bras? Age is a factor also. Newly married guys will try to buy lingerie and undergarments they think their wives would like to wear so they can take them off her. At my local mall some of the stores at Christmas or Valentine's Day will have "guy nights" to cater to fumbling men trying to figure out sizes. You rarely see an older husband at those events.

    Frankly, I would expect a seasoned sales associate to be able to discern whether or not the guy is probably a man who enjoys emulating a woman.

  25. #25
    Senior Member MissTee's Avatar
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    I once bought 2 bras at a big box mall store sale. I thought I was so clever. The SA who rang me up gave me that knowing smirk, and was rather bitter about it. Note to self: men don't buy everyday wear bras for their wife/girlfriend. I could have gotten away with it if it were perhaps a sexy Valentine's outfit.

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