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Thread: At what point did you officially recognize and accept yourself as a crossdresser?

  1. #1
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    Question At what point did you officially recognize and accept yourself as a crossdresser?

    I'm a relatively new crossdresser, but I've long been interested in dressing up. I've only recently started to indulge my desires and really try to be as feminine as possible, and so far I absolutely love it. I had worn panties and princess costumes a few times in the past, but now I really consider myself a crossdresser and want to dress en femme as often as possible.

    I'm curious as to what point other girls realized that dressing up for you wasn't just a phase or a something you were just trying out? Similarly, for those of you at what point was it no longer just an interest or desire and became a lifestyle? And what changed for you when you made this realization?

    For me it was a few weeks ago when I finally worked up the nerve to ask a girl to help me with my makeup. I told her it was just for a costume party and she was happy to help. Even though it was just makeup and I couldn't bring myself to ask her to help me dress, it was a big deal for me because it was the first time anyone else had helped me feel feminine. it felt like the first step towards actively trying to get better at dressing, and the first time I really believed that cross dressing isn't something I'm just going to grow out of.

    I'd love to hear your gal's stories!❤️

  2. #2
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    Hi allyson. I first dressed up when I was a teenager then had a few years in denial trying to convince myself it was just a 'phase' I went through, it was only about 10 years ago I started dressing again(im 39 now) and I definitely consider myself a crossdresser although still in the closet.

  3. #3
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    I have been cross dressing since I was about 7 or 8 but only pieces here and there. When I was about 12 or 13, I put on a dress for the first time. It's pretty hard to deny being a cross dresser while in a dress.

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    Allyson,
    From the age of 8-9 when it all happened for me, from that point on I always had a gut feeling or a need which never went away. For most of us it just grows from those beginnings, I just couldn't stand being in the closet anymore, I called it solitary confinement I needed to be out and stop the destructive hiding and the shame and guilt that went with it. What changed for me was when I found I was born like it and it's for life, hiding and feeling ashamed of something you can't change denying part of you has a need that you have to satisfy. The makeup and clothes are individual choices depending what drives your CDing . Looking back what also changed things for me was taking photographs especially when I finally did makeup with a wig that's when I appreciated the man had disappeared and I was looking at pictures of the woman in me. That's when I realised I could carry this thing off, Teresa came to life the other part that had been a gut feeling for so many years.

  5. #5
    Junior Member MartineCD's Avatar
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    Hi Ally

    From a young age until recently my dressing consisted of occasionally wearing panties, bra (stuffed with socks), tights or stockings. Once or twice I tried a dress or skirt but my options were limited. I've always felt an attraction to the fit and feel of womens clothing. Very recently I've found myself in a position to be able to fulfill a strong desire to dress. For the first time I put on panties, suspenders, stockings, bra (with home made balloon gel forms), skirt, top, wig and a rough attempt at make-up. I'd never felt so exhilarated and at the same time calm and at peace. Through my teens and early 20s I denied to myself that it was anything more than a passing phase. An event in my late 20s made me realise that dressing was an important part of who I was.

    Take care

    M x
    Last edited by MartineCD; 09-03-2016 at 06:35 PM. Reason: Spelling

  6. #6
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    I had an interest in women's clothing from an early age, enjoyed the feel of wearing a dress and heels starting in my late teens/early 20's. Carried on dressing into my 30's and then 40's. All that time now that I look back on it I really didn't think of myself as a crossdresser. I don't think I understood myself well enough to truly have an understanding of just how deeply embedded the need to dress was and just what it meant to me. It's only been in the last decade or so that I've got a handle on who and what the real me is all about.

    Perhaps it was because I had a sheltered upbringing, that I was a little naive about the ways of the world. Whatever the reason and in no small part to those around me here on this site, it's now, later in life, that I know myself far more fully.

    Allyson, hopefully you will gain as much information and insight as I as many others have from being part of this forum. Welcome and good fortune in your journey.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  7. #7
    Stop that, it's silly.... DIANEF's Avatar
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    A new member, welcome Allyson! I started at a fairly youngish age, typical tale really, occasional peak at my sisters undies drawer, try on a pair of pants, ooh nice, then a bra stuffed with socks, a dress, pinched my mums lipstick and did a bit of parading around the bedroom. Irish catholic family so such activities had to stay well hidden. By 17 had scraped together a few things of my own and ever since I've taken pretty much any opportunity to dress. Been through periods of self doubt, why am I doing this?, will having a girlfriend 'cure' me? But, here I am 30 odd years later and just as keen as ever to slip into my female mode whenever possible. If you are fairly new to this thing and seem to be enjoying the experience I'd say to take it at whatever pace is best for you. There are no timescales or rules, it is a case of literally just doing your own thing. I doubt you'll grow out of it, why would you want to?

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    Welcome Allyson,
    I believe you will find lots of interesting stories here on this site that will help you. I certainly did. Until my mid-twenties, thought I often dressed in lingerie I rarely dressed in other female clothing but I dd experiment with makeup. Then sometime in my early thirties I began to dress more completely and so it has progressed to the point where I love to be dressed as it feels so right for me.
    So, my experience has been one of progression. Yours may be completely different. One thing you will notice as you read more threads on this site is that we are a very mixed group that challenges simple categorization. I hope your journey is a smooth and enjoyable one.

  9. #9
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Not sure what exactly makes it 'official'. But for me, I knew there was something different that was not going to go away by the time I was in my teens. I didn't know exactly what I was at that point. The initial purge and with the later reacquiring of my own female wardrobe, made it clear it wasn't a 'phase'. At 33, as I had not dressed up in many years, I thought that I had 'beaten it'. And for another seven years, it seemed that I had. But it was not to be, and the desire to dress up returned with a vengeance. The last time, eventually I simply gave up trying to resist the urge, and just dressed the way I felt like.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  10. #10
    tiptoeing thru the tulips ellbee's Avatar
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    "I'm curious as to what point other girls realized that dressing up for you wasn't just a phase or a something you were just trying out?"

    I started young, at 6 years old, when I tried on my 1st piece at a 5-year-old girl neighbor's house. Though I remember even at 4 being drawn in by the colors & fabrics of my mom's clothing. Realized it was more than just a phase when I was still dressing up in increasingly various things a few years later. And at 13, forget it -- I was totally hooked by then! Puberty, and all that.



    "Similarly, for those of you at what point was it no longer just an interest or desire and became a lifestyle? And what changed for you when you made this realization?"

    Probably when I got my first real wig in my early 20's. Already had everything else down pat. And simply made do without a wig in different ways until that point. But when that synthetic hair was put on, completing that transformation into something *very* real? I knew I was in DEEP!

    I loved it, but I also wrestled & struggled & battled with it for a long time, with binges & purges, alternating between elation & shame. Not a healthy cycle to be repeating over & over again.


    Even now, I still struggle with it a bit from time to time. But I've given up the real fighting, which is pointless & only makes things worse, really.

    It's what I do, it's who I am. I can't change it. It's at my fundamental core, no matter where I am in life at any given point. Gotta just go with the flow... Much better & easier that way.

  11. #11
    Girly Girl gailprice's Avatar
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    Hi Allyson

    I was also dressing / experimenting when i was 7 to 8 years old. But I fully dressed when i was about 10 or 11 years old and it was at that point I knew i liked it and accepted i was a crossdresser. Crossdressing just got better from that point.
    I wish I could do it all again

    Gail xxx

  12. #12
    Junior Member Nine's Avatar
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    It's really a good question....

    I started to wear dresses of my sister when I was 5... and spent my teenage as androgynous... I am not sure that I had an idea what CD was.
    I stopped CD during my family life.

    Now I'm free and naturally, CD is one part of my life today. I never thought it was something bad or shamy.

    I think that today I recognize me as Transgender cause most of my friends and my sister know this part of my being.
    And this feeling to be not really a boy never leave me.

    And the most important is that.

    I don't hide my make up, perfumes. My female clothes are in my dressing with male clothes, my pumps, boots are outside. cause I've two many shoes !!! (M or f !)
    I did hide all my female clothes when someone came to my house, and one day I said to me "Ok Stop !! show them who you are and if they cannot understand...they are not friends of mine !"
    It's why I'm T and I recognize me as Transgender. Open your mind to others.

    sorry for my English, hope you can understand !!
    Last edited by Nine; 09-03-2016 at 08:11 PM.

  13. #13
    Member LydiaL's Avatar
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    Always amazed at how young an age when some of you recognized cross-dressing desires. I would not have had a chance even if I had wanted to, being one of 8 siblings living in a somewhat small house!

    I did try on a sister's dresses and mom's hosiery when in my teens and had some time home alone.

    Those cross-dressing desires were put on hold until about the age of 29. Separation and then divorce led me to revisit my desires to explore my femme side. Aside from a couple of purges, I really have not looked back.

    I now dress quite often and cannot stop adding to the wardrobe all too regularly!

  14. #14
    Gold Member Dana44's Avatar
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    Welcome Allyson, I stared young and though my younger years I gave it up with my first wife. But then I had to dress and go out with her. LOL But the urge got stronger as I got older. IT was in my forties that I knew I was a CD and had a new wife and she was good with it but we divorced and I dressed with another girlfriend. Now I am with hopefully my final one and we both go out dressed. It get better though life but then there are not to many years left and now live life to its fullest.
    Part Time Girl

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    Member julia marie's Avatar
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    I didn't know the term crossdresser when i was a teen and trying on my sister's bikini, or years later when I would try on a bra that a friend forgot after staying over at our house, or when I'd buy a negligee to wear in the hotel room on a business trip in my 40s. I guess I was a crossdresser in all those instances, even though the term didn't come to mind. In reality, it's the mindset and actions that matter, and yes, I started as a teen. I enjoyed all of the above.

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    I started when I was 5 or 6, wearing pantyhose, and progressing to other stuff. I stopped during high school, then started back up with a vengeance afterwards. my sister, who I'm out to now, fully dressed me when I was 18 or so, which was amazing but supposedly just for a costume, wink wink nod nod. I bought my first heels from a tg boutique when I was 19 or 20. I talked m now wife into putting makeup on me around the same time and it freaked her out, so I basically partially dressed in secret on occasion for the next 25 years. I was totally in denial about falling under the TG umbrella, and was ashamed of crossdressing and TG feelings.

    6 months ago I admitted to myself that I've had gender issues my entire life and crossdressing was an expression of it. Once I came clean to myself I thought about it for a couple weeks, then told my wife, though I had told her about the crossdressing about 6 months into dating.

  17. #17
    Aspiring Member lmildcd's Avatar
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    September 24, 2015. I was reading a book called Rediscovering Catholicism and the emphasis was be true to oneself. I wrote a blog coming out of the closet on the date mentioned. I've been wearing women's clothes off and on for years but finally accepted it was part of me last year.
    lmildcd is now known as Lennette Lost.

  18. #18
    Gold Member Diane Smith's Avatar
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    My urge to dress goes back to my very earliest memories, and was fully in control of my life by the time I was five. I never really stopped at any time but kept it low-key and very secret until age 40, in 1997. Then, while on a vacation in the Southwest, the dam broke for some reason and I embraced it fully as an essential part of my personality. Within a few weeks starting that August, I shopped openly for women's clothes for the first time, had my first makeover, started wearing acrylic nails, got a feminine tattoo, began electrolysis, and made contact with a support group in Chicago and went on several of their outings. I haven't been the same since, and I haven't got a clue as to what exactly set me off at that particular moment.

    - Diane

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    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    For me it was roughly 3-4 months ago. It was a rather odd experience. I hadn't really dressed previously but I very suddenly came to realize it was what I wanted to do. I know in just a few days from not really thinking about it in any capacity to OMG I WANT TO DO THIS! It really was like a light going on. In that same brief period I came out to my wife (bless her for her understanding and support). But I couldn't really tell you any more about it because it's kind of a blur. Now that I know what I am and what I want to be, I can look back and see the trail of clues leading all the way back to my childhood. Now I almost wonder how I could have missed such obvious clues in myself, but before they all just seemed normal or easily explained away.

  20. #20
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    I must start by saying I have never had the urge to dress as a woman I have wore my wife's panties and nail polish (on my toes only) for a few months after losing a bet to my wife. however last Thursday me and my wife were reading an erotic story and half way through it it was revealed that the husband was a cross dresser, at that point I was turned off but my wife was extremely turned on, so we decided to try that one night in bed, it started with me wearing a teddy during foreplay, and now here I sit for the third night in a row in a dress a slip pantyhose nails (fingers and toes) painted 3 inch heels and makeup with a bra stuffed with thermal socks freaking out that I enjoy this so much that I want to go and buy a wig my own makeup and breast forms so that I can fully dress as a woman. Along with scouring the Internet for answers as to why I am enjoying this so much, so I guess it was tonight that I realized that I am a cross dresser and my name is Jane.

  21. #21
    Little Mrs. Snarky! Nadine Spirit's Avatar
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    I have been gender non-conforming for ever, even though I didn't realize it. I didn't dress at all until some time in my twenties. Somewhere around 30 or so, I threw everything away. My one and only purge. I thought I was done. Within a few short years I had replaced everything and finally fully dressed with a wig and makeup for the first time. It was around then I realized this isn't just a phase and I finally accepted who I have always been.

  22. #22
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    For me I guess it just a few years ago when I fully dressed up, wig to heels, for the first time and went out in public that night.
    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

    -Home Movies
    (cartoon series)

    Shoe size: 9 US women's.
    Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
    Height: 5' 6".

  23. #23
    Member DaniT's Avatar
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    I knew I was a cross dresser as a teenager, and had been wearing girls clothes as early as 8 or 9 years old.

    After High school I went firmly into denial for about 16 years. About 2 months ago it all came back like a tidal wave. I can accept it now but I am starting to work through gender issues with my therapist.

    Self acceptance and acceptance of cross dressing seem to be different things for me. Thankfully my wife has been more accepting of me than I am of myself.

    That said, I have no desire to stop dressing even though it has made life a lot harder. It feels way too right to be wrong, I will never quit or purge again.

    Dani
    Last edited by DaniT; 09-04-2016 at 01:05 AM. Reason: spelling

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member dana digs sweaters's Avatar
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    Got to be age 7.
    Was already wearing some of my sister's clothes (and Mom's)
    FULLY dressed for Halloween at school.
    Plenty of dress up games with 3 older sisters and my twin sisters a year younger then me.
    I knew what I was doing.
    Milton Berle, Flip Wilson, Klinger from MASH were on TV dressed in female clothes, so why couldn't I be also?
    Seeing their different clothes growing up, our Mom's taste in fashion, it was enjoyable being their "unknown sister"

  25. #25
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    First wore mom's undies at 6-7. Wore just panties when in teens! Wore panties about 3 times when married! Wife died last year and a few months after pink fog surrounded me! Bought panties at K Mart and have been dressing more and more!! So started at 6-7 but full realization was last year!! I am 65! Hugs Lana Mae

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