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Thread: Don't know why I bothered

  1. #1
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    Don't know why I bothered

    Saturday is my night for Karen and tonight I did what I have done every Saturday for a while now.I did the makeup got dressed and visited this forum with the intention of going for a drive later tonight while dressed.I sat in front of the computer for a while and then the desire to be dressed left me and I couldn't wait to get out of my female clothing and to wipe the makeup off.The thought of staying dressed and going out seemed crazy.I thought about dressing up all week and I couldn't wait for Saturday night , it was disappointing to say the least.I hope this isn't a sign of things to come,I am a little frightened of where my dressing may be headed.Do I need to take a break from dressing regularly,step back for a while.Not sure what I need to do.

  2. #2
    Southern Girl dolovewell's Avatar
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    I remember there was a time where I was buying clothes at a much faster rate than I could wear, so I would force myself to dress up more and more frequently to justify my purchases.

    However there would be some days I would come home from a long day at work or whatever and just didn't feel like it. But I would feel obligated and force myself to do it, and I wouldn't enjoy it. I learned the lesson not to force it - if you aren't feeling it, do something else that day and see if you are feeling it again another time.

    Your situation is a bit different in that you were anticipating it and after going through the process of getting all dressed up, your desire waned. Is there anything that happened that may have caused your change in attitude? Have you ever gone out before? Could it have been fear?

  3. #3
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    It's vital to pace yourself.
    I have taken a hiatus on a regular basis, some longer than others.
    We're all different; if you feel the slightest bit exhausted from it, then I would simply suggest taking a break/hiatus.

    During a hiatus, however, I still will just lounge around in a pair of high heels (six inch plus).
    I haven't taken a hiatus from heels in YEARS.

    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
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  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by somestimeskaren View Post
    Saturday is my night for Karen and tonight I did what I have done every Saturday for a while now....
    Karen, I think you should dress when you want, not on some schedule. Routine takes away the fun of anything. If you don;t feel like dressing, don't.

  5. #5
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    I know how you feel.
    I went for about fifteen years without dressing, then last December the Pink Fog hit me like a ton of bricks!

    From January to July I bought 70 dresses and dressed every Saturday,
    Then all of a sudden, NO Pink Fog for the last six weeks.

    I hate loosing interest in things I love, I pretty sure it will come back.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  6. #6
    Southern Girl dolovewell's Avatar
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    Oh it will come back. Trust me. I purged in February 2015. Was adamant I would not come back.

    It came back and I resisted. Then it came back stronger. The stronger I pushed back, the harder it would eventually come back around.
    Last edited by Lorileah; 09-17-2016 at 10:40 PM. Reason: no need to quote post above yours

  7. #7
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    I agree with Jennifer only dress when you want to.
    It doesn't have to mean anything if you don't have the urge to dress.

  8. #8
    Silver Member NancySue's Avatar
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    Add me to the list of "it comes with the territory and will always return". Do anything you want to do, to any degree you want..when you feel like doing it...do it. When you don't...don't. Roll with the flow. I never have any idea what's next. It's kinda fun to see what the next feeling will be. I'm in a reactive mode. Sometimes, I wear nothing feminine...sometimes underneath....sometimes one or two..or three items..and many times, totally. Occasionally, I'll start the day with minimal items...panties, bra...by noon, a little more, a touch of make up, perfume, flats, heels, change outfits, etc. Our dressing needs are fluid...so must we be. Relax, enjoy. 💄👗👠👜

  9. #9
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Karen, don't be concerned yet. I first arrived here 8 years ago after dressing in a complete vacuum for years.

    I became completely consumed with either dressing or thots of outfits I mite wear next. I dressed and shopped constantly for 3 months. I was soon overwhelmed. Almost unable to function at work, sleep, or in my personal life. Then, suddenly it all stopped. I wanted nothing to do with dressing for nearly 3 more months.

    When the desire to dress returned, I worked out a balance of dressing when I needed to and that allowed me to concentrate properly on other things again. That adjustment continues to work for me.

    Some of us need to dress every day. Some only need to a few times a year. Don't worry. Just relax and find your own comfort zone.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  10. #10
    Silver Member Sarah Louise's Avatar
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    Yes, the desire can come and go. I had a 5 month break last year and just enjoyed doing other things. As much as I enjoy dressing, I would welcome another break as it does take over a bit. There's so many other things I could be doing. There doesn't seem much chance of this at the moment though!
    A girl can never have too many dresses

  11. #11
    New Member NatalieLM's Avatar
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    I find a lot of the time it comes down to how you are feeling about yourself and life in general.

    If you don't really feel like doing it then take a night off, we all know the feeling will come back

  12. #12
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Last night, Saturday night, I also planned on getting dolled up and taking pictures in a dress, then in lingerie, but i was too tired, and lost interest, also, went to bed early. A lot of stresses and just too worn out to put out the effort. It's OK!

  13. #13
    Senior Member MissTee's Avatar
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    That happens for certain. I've gone long periods without dressing. I used to think I had to go all out and put on makeup, wig and form dress and pumps and jewelry. And for a while I did. What a fog that was! Over time the calling to go all out yielded to moderation.

    Anymore, there are times when I am completely happy with underdressing at home - cotton panties and maybe a bra with no forms. Other times I feel like getting my girl on and dressing to the max. I've learned that it is all OK. I just go with the feeling and dress accordingly, and that's an alright thing to do.

  14. #14
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
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    To me it sounds like when I make plans with my friends and we go on all week that we are going to drink and have a blast. Then it comes around and it's like we over hiped it. A few times that also happened with Maria I couldn't wait and then I was tierd or just to much work. If I were you I wouldn't look into to much and just let it happen or make it flow, and dress when you want and don't beat yourself up with the lost opportunity time. Just me I know about lost opportunities.

  15. #15
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    I see it as being no differently from on odd occasions not feeling in the mood to go out to attend the gym or football training session or night school class that you go to every week. Sometimes you're just not in the mood. It's as simple as that. The following week, all back to normal.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  16. #16
    Jessikah will be! Dragonfir3zz's Avatar
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    For me i dont always want to fully dress, sitting around the house, i am goid without wig, & makeup. Pair of shorts, racerback with bra & forms. Yet sometimes it can be 20 min before i just switch back. I have switched several times a day.
    Jessikah Rey will be free!

  17. #17
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Karen, I gathered from your post that this is something of a ritual. Maybe that's the problem? Maybe it's become TOO routine? Too mundane? Maybe you just need a little variety?

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by somestimeskaren View Post
    ... and then the desire to be dressed left me and I couldn't wait to get out of my female clothing and to wipe the makeup off...
    I can say this is something I've never experienced. I gotta go with Micki on this one, maybe it's just become too routine. Almost more of a chore than something you actually enjoy the process of. Taking a step back might be what's needed, but it also might just be that you need to change up what you're doing. What were you looking forward to all week? Was it the feeling of the clothes on your skin, the reflection you see in the mirror, the rush of going out in public? Maybe take a look at whatever it is that you were so anxious for during the week and focus on that when Saturday comes. If it's the feel of the clothes, maybe try a new outfit (perhaps a new type of lingerie or dress that you've never worn before). If it's the thrill of going out, maybe trying a new place or a new activity will help. Just some thoughts I had, I hope something in there is helpful for you.

  19. #19
    Southern Girl dolovewell's Avatar
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    Lots of truth to those of you saying that when something becomes a routine, it essentially becomes a chore.

    I know this was the case for me. I was buying new clothes and makeup faster than I could wear them. I would "schedule" my dressing days to justify all my purchases. It became a routine and began to feel like a chore. There would be days I would come home from work and not feel like doing anything, or weekends where I just felt like relaxing and not doing anything, and I would force myself to dress anyway and I wouldn't enjoy it. I would be shaving(which is my least favorite part of it all) and just want to stop. But I would force myself to continue even though it felt like an obligation.

    It became too routine. I think its better when it is spontaneous and you just kind of go with the flow.

  20. #20
    Jessikah will be! Dragonfir3zz's Avatar
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    I agree eith Micki, too ritualistic, pre-planned. CD-ing like sex, is better without a schedule.
    Jessikah Rey will be free!

  21. #21
    TrueNorth Strong & Fierce Princess Chantal's Avatar
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    Hmmm the majority of my favourite crossdressing moments were needing pre-planning thanks to purchasing event tickets and/or taking advantage of a rare opportunity for fun. But then again, I am not the type to get all excited over crossdressing for the everyday things like shopping or a relaxing day at home. No pre-planning needed from me to do those type of activities that could be done whenever I feel like (which is quite rare).
    However, if your heart is not in it don't force yourself to crossdress. I have forced myself to crossdress in order to accomodate pre-planned shopping trips and night club outings with friends in which I wasn't really feeling like doing at the times.... And those outings always sucked thanks to my heart and mind not being into it. So I have stopped forcing myself to crossdress for activities that could be done anytime, and keep them spontaneous.

  22. #22
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    Hi Karen, When it's no longer fun stop and try another hobby for a while and I am sere that it will return with a vengeance......
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

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  23. #23
    Senior Member Lori Kurtz's Avatar
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    It's not surprising that some of us feel guilt or shame about dressing--there are a lot of "shoulds" and "should nots" that govern society and influence our individual lives. It sounds as though you're in the unusual place of having taken on a "should" attitude about crossdressing.

    Let it go, girlfriend. Don't be governed by the "shoulds" and "should nots". Do what feels right to you in the moment. Another moment might feel different, and that's okay too. Relax, and just enjoy your life.

    Hugs.

  24. #24
    Reality Check
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    Crossdressing is optional unless you are living as a woman. Others have said it but I'll say it again: If you don't feel like doing it, don't. The next time you feel like doing it and the opportunity presents itself, go ahead and do it. That's life and it's perfectly normal.

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