An odd orientation question...

[bok4fun]

This is not a discussion about the orientation of us. Rather it is about the men who may pursue us in some way.

Earlier today, I happened to be trolling a chat board, which is primarily for MtF CDs in our local area, but which allows gentleman to join on occasion by invitation only. I noticed a male member who was there looking for MtF CDs to be with, I assume for a no strings one night stand. Nothing uncommon, until he said one thing I had never seen before: "I am straight!" I've seen men say other things with regards to orientation, most notably that they weren't gay, and weren't looking to hook up with another guy, but this one was a first for me. I'm not sure I had really ever thought about it much before, but it made me curious. Does anybody here have any thoughts as to what the correct title might be for a male such as this? Are they straight? I think I would say no, but I'm not sure if I would go so far as to call them gay, or even bi. I'm really not sure what the answer is.

[Dana44]

They are called tranny chasers. They typically are straight men who like trans girls. They do not want to be called gay and they think of straight sex with the trans girl. I did a couple of them and they were straight. It was a nice feeling to be treated as a woman. Also you had to perform as one and their desires were a bit deeper. But they thought of you as a woman.

[Tracii G]

There we go with the stereotype that they have to be gay.
They are whats known as an admirer. They know you are a man just like they are and know the majority of CDers are straight.
They just like being with Trans girls and regular CDers.
I have dated maybe 5 or 6 guys that just wanted to hang out together nothing more.
One has taken me to dinner and to the opera a couple of times. He is a very nice man and we always have a great time.
All he asks for is to hold hands and kiss occasionally which I am more than happy to do with him because is a gentleman always.

I would call them straight men that like T girls.
Tranny chasers is what some call them.

[Georgette_USA]

I call those delusional.

There are many ways to describe them. this is one.

Heteroflexible, Heteroflexibility is a form of a sexual orientation or situational sexual behavior characterized by minimal homosexual activity in an otherwise primarily heterosexual orientation that is considered to distinguish it from bisexuality. It has been characterized as "mostly straight".

Definitely not Gay. Some Gay or BI-sexual will have sex with CDs, or TG/TS.
But even those have some limitations. I have dis-appointed some that see me as Trans, but when they learn that I have had SRS lose interest.

[bok4fun]

There we go with the stereotype that they have to be gay.

There who goes? I never said that and neither of the other replies said that...

[ellbee]

I much prefer the term "admirers."


Nah, they ain't hetero. Or at least not 100% hetero. If one wants to insist that he is, then so be it; don't argue. Whatever he needs to believe. But I'm privately not going to buy into that myth.

And hey, who can blame them for their attraction? Kinda getting the best of both worlds? Having their cake & eating it, too?


I'm not encouraging it, but if you're willing & able, and are either single or have an open marriage where your SO is cool with it, then go for it. Hanging out/going on a date and maybe even having sex with a guy while you're en femme & taking on the traditional female role? Pretty amazing when with the right guy. I could have gone all night, each & every time, LOL. And if you think it might happen with him on any given day, just make sure you, um, prepare yourself down there first before you leave the house.

Oh, and be safe, please!


On the flip side, one time when I was out in 100% guy-mode (drag competition & clubbing afterwards -- why I didn't get all dolled-up, I have no idea), I met a friend of a friend who turned out to be one of the judges for the competition. She actually caught my eye from afar during that, before we were introduced later on. And I'm not typically one who goes for people like that, which threw me for a bit of a loop. According to my friend, she was a CD'er... But I'm not so sure they knew the whole current story at the time, as personally I think maybe something else a bit deeper was going on with her. Bi-gender? Hormones? Who knows. But she was very fem, in both appearance & behavior.

Basically spent the evening at the club, just her & me cozying up on a leather loveseat, having drinks & what-not. She was definitely into guys, and was definitely into me, ha! If we had met up a couple more times after that, and continued to hit it off? Yeah, I could have possibly seen myself taking her home for the night. But I didn't push for that opportunity, as part of me was still wrestling with the idea. So, I left it up to chance/fate/whatever. Never ran into her again, and didn't bother pressing our mutual friend for more info.

She was attractive & pretty fem, and we certainly meshed -- definitely times during that evening when I didn't see her as anything but a GG. And sometimes I wish I had pursued things further. Ah, well!

[ReineD]

Maybe this is what he meant?



My SO loves this song. I love the ending ... "Tell the world 'I'M STRAIGHT'!" lol


But seriously, this is again a great example of how imprecise are single words. There are all kinds of nuances and personal spins that make it difficult for two people to agree exactly on the meaning of some words, especially those that describe gender and sexual attraction.

It would have been more accurate if this guy had instead used a simple sentence, and described his attraction instead of using a single word that attempts to describe both his attraction and his sexual orientation. He should have said something like, "I'm attracted (or not) to birth-females and TGs who dress like women". And if he was really honest, he might have added, "... as long as they have not had SRS". No one can argue with that.

They do not want to be called gay and they think of straight sex with the trans girl. I did a couple of them and they were straight.

But, don't the body parts align differently whether with a male or a female, with some parts missing on one or the other, and the difference between the two is rather significant?

[Jesse Six]

I call them 'straight-ish'. We've all known for a while that most people aren't 100% straight or gay.

The problem with calling them anything other than 'straight', is that they're afraid of it. They are deeply invested in their straight persona, they don't see themselves as part of the LGBT world, and they don't want to be ridiculed by others. So it's not worth arguing "hey, you're kinda bi". Calling them out on this can be dangerous to your health.

Realistically, it has to be admitted that they are more hetero than gay - they tend to be more attracted to you the more feminine you look. And yet... they definitely appreciate your male bits.

[josie_S]

The problem with calling them anything other than 'straight', is that they're afraid of it. They are deeply invested in their straight persona, they don't see themselves as part of the LGBT world, and they don't want to be ridiculed by others. So it's not worth arguing "hey, you're kinda bi". Calling them out on this can be dangerous to your health.

This is accurate I think, not to mention good advice.

I'll just say that I've done enough mental gymnastics around my *own* orientation and what I like and when I like it and how I like it etc that I am not going to do that for another person

[Mayo]

I agree with Jesse Six. Another forum I'm on routinely has threads about men who enjoy being with other men but insist that they're straight - "I'm not gay and I'd never kiss another guy but I love [4-letter word for male genitalia]" is a common refrain. Many of these guys are also very interested in trans female porn and CDs. I'm inclined to think that it's some sort of outward projection of the emphasis our patriarchal society puts on men's genitals. Technically they obviously aren't 100% straight, but there are more female 'cues' or signifiers attached to trans woman and CDs and so they are 'safer' outlets for those urges.

[Allison2006]

I can recall being hit on twice by guys in chat rooms. I am not into guys at all but I was curious as what their orientation was and when I asked I don't believe either one gave an answer, they just dodged the question.