100% heterosexual--dressed or not.
Currently straight. While fantasies are just fantasies, if I ever decide to experiment and find that I like some of that stuff then I could change my answer to bi-sexual for sex, but I don't find men attractive at all (so likely straight with a possibility of sexual kinks). And I've never fully dressed up and went out so along those lines... no lo sé.
Now if you'd said that transwomen didn't face other issues that women face in a misogynistic, man-centric world, you'd perhaps be on the same footing as the TERFS. For example, we don't face the threat of rape. Oh no wait, I've faced that. In fact many of us who are raped face especially savage rapes. Guys don't target us as victims of crime because we aren't real women. Oh wait, no, that's happened to me too. In fact, I worry about being out on the street after dark now. We definitely aren't talked over by men, ignored, or our input totally disregarded. Except - all those things happen to me on a routine basis now.
If you mean I should continue to be punished because I had a hellish, nightmare existence where I desperately tried to be something I just wasn't (a man), and because I missed out on both good events in a young woman's life, as well as some bad ones, then i just think you are kind of mean spirited.
Oh, to answer the question originally posed by this thread, and the logic many of you seem to use, obviously I'm arrow straight. Yup, straighter than straight. Before transition, I was married to two different women. And apparently, since my transition doesn't count, I guess the label for my sexual orientation didn't change either? So what am I? What if I date a cisgender woman now? What would you call my sexual orientation? How about if I date another trans woman? Or, as is the case for me, what if I'm engaged to a transgender (FtM) man? Am I straight in that case, because in your mind I'm a man and he's a woman? Or if I date a trans woman, are we both just a couple of gay dudes with boobs?
But don't worry much if I seem to be chiding you over your use of terminology. Hey, the CDC classifies me and my fiancé (trans woman + trans man) as if we are both just a couple of gay dudes - we are listed as "men who have sex with men" and prohibited from blood donation. Perhaps you can explain that one to me.
Oh, one last thing - something I've observed over my lifetime. People who are really straight don't talk about how straight they are. Seriously, they just don't.
Last edited by Lorileah; 12-05-2016 at 04:08 PM. Reason: Refers to deleted part of post
@ PaulaQ
I certainly didn't mean to open your particular can of worms there, but I mean what I say. Those who are born and raised as boys can not claim to be anything which is regarded as strictly female. Only genetic females can be lesbian. I was born with masculine parts, so I am straight. Even though I've always felt like a lady, I am a man and I have all of the ridiculous privileges that come along with it. Life may have been harder for you in your particular case, but for the most part, men have it too easy to go around claiming they can be anything a woman can be. That's especially true because women have been denied rights equal to men for too long for them to have to tolerate a male coming around claiming they are a female when they most certainly are not.
Last edited by Lorileah; 12-05-2016 at 04:10 PM. Reason: you didn't need whole quote
Neato. There are actually parts of what you wrote that are almost sensible, but you veered off course around the middle.
I'll be sure to let all those men know to stop oppressing me like other women, because it doesn't count for their scoreboard according to a dude in a dress on the Internet.
Coming out is like discovering that you've been drowning your whole life after actually breathing air for the first time.
Somewhere along a spectrum. Seriously. Labels are so often inadequate and/or inaccurate. Yes, they're handy. I am a "cross dresser", but that doesn't define my sexual preference. Nor does it, really, define my gender identity. Not all the time. It's just a handy term for the guy that likes to be Kelly sometimes.
If one is comfortable adopting a label, that's fine. To be sure, there is frequently some comfort in that kind of "conformity", but we should never force others into this or that box, nor should we tell them that they can't use this or that label because they don't fit the "standard" (or your particular) definition. By the same token, I bristle every time I hear the expression "just a [insert label here]", referring either to others or one's self.
Getting a bit off topic aren't we?
The term "male lesbian" would be a topic for a different thread.
Words that we have traditionally used, in the cis-world, to describe someone’s sexual orientation cannot be used in the trans-world with the same understanding. Words like "straight", "gay", "lesbian" traditionally describe not only a person’s sexual orientation, they also describe a person’s gender identity.
The cis-world presumes that a person’s gender identity matches their birth sex and in this scenario, the following words have these meanings:
- Straight: the attraction of one sex to another.
- Gay: the attraction of one male-sex person to another male-sex person.
- Lesbian: the attraction of one female-sex person to another female-sex person.
- Bi: the attraction of one sex to both the other sexes.
In the trans/CD-world, these situations exist:
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to male-sex presenting as a man.
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to male-sex presenting as a man.
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to male-sex presenting as a man.
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to male-sex presenting as a man.
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to male-sex presenting as a woman.
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to male-sex presenting as a woman.
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to male-sex presenting as a woman.
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to male-sex presenting as a woman.
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to female-sex presenting as a woman.
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to female-sex presenting as a woman.
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to female-sex presenting as a woman.
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to female-sex presenting as a woman.
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to female-sex presenting as a man.
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to female-sex presenting as a man.
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to female-sex presenting as a man.
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to female-sex presenting as a man.
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to transitioned male (with bottom surgery.
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to transitioned male (with bottom surgery.
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to transitioned male (with bottom surgery.
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to transitioned male (with bottom surgery.
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to any combination of male-sex presenting as a man, male-sex presenting as a woman, transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Male-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to any combination of female-sex presenting as a woman, female-sex presenting as a man, transitioned male (with bottom surgery).
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to any combination of male-sex presenting as a man, male-sex presenting as a woman, transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Transitioned female (with new vagina), attracted to any combination of female-sex presenting as a woman, female-sex presenting as a man, transitioned male (with bottom surgery).
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to any combination of male-sex presenting as a man, male-sex presenting as a woman, transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Female-sex presenting as a man, attracted to any combination of female-sex presenting as a woman, female-sex presenting as a man, transitioned male (with bottom surgery).
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to any combination of male-sex presenting as a man, male-sex presenting as a woman, transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Transitioned male (with bottom surgery), attracted to any combination of female-sex presenting as a woman, female-sex presenting as a man, transitioned male (with bottom surgery).
- Male-sex presenting as a man, attracted to male-sex presenting as a woman.
- Male-sex presenting as a man, attracted to a transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Male-sex presenting as a man, attracted to female-sex presenting as a man,.
- Male-sex presenting as a man, attracted to a transitioned male (with bottom surgery).
- Female-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to male-sex presenting as a woman.
- Female-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to a transitioned female (with new vagina).
- Female-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to female-sex presenting as a man,.
- Female-sex presenting as a woman, attracted to a transitioned male (with bottom surgery).
Can you all see what the problem is here? In the trans-world,we need to stop trying to use words that describe at the same time, a person’s gender ID and their sexual orientation. We need simply to say, "I’m attracted to my partner".
... or, we need to come up with 40+ new words. I didn't even get into the "sometimes" scenarios, as in "I'm attracted to "x" while dressed, but "y" while not dressed".
Last edited by ReineD; 12-05-2016 at 02:15 PM.
Reine
That darned vowel, and sometimes Y lol. My response was sort of what you are talking about. I'm sexually attracted to women, I didn't label it.
we're 180+ responses into this. The OP can define "straight" otherwise the discussion of the variants continues. Reine has listed options. Is a crossdresser who likes men while dressed "straight"? I would say the TSs here who have responded are "straight" in that they like men.
OP, do you wish to amend your question and make it clearer?
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
It's actually much simpler if you simply allow that someone's gender identity is more real than their so-called biological sex. (This notion of biological sex as a binary totally erases intersex people, by the way.) This would imply that trans women are women, trans men are men, and a straight trans woman is attracted to male identified people, a gay transman is attracted to male identified people, a lesbian is attracted to female identified people, etc.
The trouble with saying "I'm attracted to my partner" is that it totally erases gender and sexual minorities. This may not seem like a big deal if you are a cis-het person, but believe me, as a member of a GSM, erasure is awful. It does, in fact, kill people.
I guess, though, the party line here is that trans women are still men, and trans men are still women?Originally Posted by Darth Daddicus
Should I be able to have an "F" on my driver's license? Should I be able to use a women's restroom? If I go to jail, should I be housed with the men? (This would be really dangerous for me since I have a vagina!) Should an employer be able to fire me since I won't meet their dress code standards for men? (I don't even look like a man when I'm wearing men's clothing, btw.) In fact should I have any rights at all?
You seem to be implying that all trans women are just men. This is a really mean thing to say to all of the trans women on this forum. If you meant something else - and I don't see how to interpret what you've said and clarified now any other way - I'd love to hear it.
however: I will ask that we get back on the OP's question of "are you straight" Thanks
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
Yes, I'm straight. And so is my SO. One of my SO's favorite videos:
Reine
I fall into ReineD's "sometimes" category. I am attracted to "x" while dressed but attracted to "y" while not dressed.
Men are yucky hairy apes .....I know, I'm one most of the time.
I will admire a good looking CD but that's where it ends.
I'm only attracted to gg's.
Hugs
Samantha
What a question. I would consider myself bi. I love women and making love with one. I also like making love with a woman with me dressed as woman. I do have fantasies of be with a man, BUT with conditions. He has to be smooth, little or no body hair, no a hard masculine looking man, a bit softer than most.
Stunning picture Samantha 2015!
Samantha 54
Straight
I thought I made it pretty clear. I was assuming I was asking MTF crossdressers. I didn't think I had to specify that because I posted in the MTF crossdressers section, not the transsexual section. If it needs clarification, here it is revised:
For MTF crossdressers only, how many are "straight" (sexually attracted to women only)?
Krisi, I sense your frustration. Forum rules allow you to direct questions or topics for discussion to specific groups, and ask those who don't fall into the specified group to refrain from replying. "How many are straight males..." seems clear to me. It's a simple question complicated by those who don't identify as straight males.
My answer: I'm a straight male whose sexual orientation (and gender identity) doesn't change when I crossdress.
Thank you. It would be simpler if this forum supported polls. Straight? Gay? Bisexual?
Krisi, your poll would still be skewed for the reasons I tried to explain in my rather long post above (which was an attempt to make a point). You take it that for CDers, "straight" means an attraction to women. But in your poll, there would still be a number of non-TS people who would think themselves same-sex attracted because they are still attracted to their wives when dressed. And if they're attracted to men while dressed, they might well reply "straight". Also, there are people whose attraction changes according to how they're dressed.
It gets really confusing when putting it terms of "straight", "gay", or "bi". Best to ask if they're attracted to men or women. Or if they say they're bi, are they always attracted to both regardless of how they're dressed, or does "both" mean it changes from one to the other depending on the presentation. And then how does one classify an attraction to another CDer, if the responder believes the other CDer is a woman when dressed.
Not wanting to be flippant, just saying we need to find words that don't describe a gender identity at the same time as a sexual attraction if you want an accurate sense of who our members are attracted to.
Reine
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
I agree that every sex and gender combination being attracted to every sex and gender combination might benefit from new terms to describe all those kinds of relationships. But I still think the question is simple and should get simple answers. Maybe because my square peg fits nicely into the that square hole of a question. I am a straight male (attracted to women only) whose subject of attraction doesn't change when I crossdress. That is, no, I am not attracted to men when I crossdress. The answer to the question is either "yes, me" or "no, not me". Gender identity isn't part of the question or the answer.
For me, I don't think about my attraction to someone when I'm crossdressed. I'm "in the moment" of enjoying my dressup session.