The Influence of "Girls" Toys, Games, and Media

[Christina D]

The number one thing that's helping me make sense of my desire to crossdress goes back (not surprisingly) to my childhood, though it wasn't a fascination with clothes.

Growing up, I was almost always more interested in playing with "girl toys" and watching "girl movies" than the traditionally male toys/media presented to me. As far back as kindergarten, I remember wanting to play more with Barbie than GI Joe. I'd rather play Mall Madness than Risk. My first favorite movie (and still one of my favorites) was Disney's The Little Mermaid. When anime TV shows started to gain popularity in the US in the 1990s, I much preferred Sailor Moon over Dragon Ballz.

Needless to say, almost everyone around me tried to "correct" this behavior. Usually, other little girls didn't mind me playing with them, but the other boys sure did tease me. My mother and my teachers noticed this a lot and repeatedly told me that while it was ok to like those kinds of things at home, I should try to keep those interests there and to myself. While I understand they only had the best intentions in mind, it did make me feel a lot of shame about interests that I had no control over.

Again, I never dressed up as a girl when I was younger nor did I have any extreme desire to do so. My desire to crossdress didn't hit until by early 20s, and only now at 31 have I actually been pursuing that desire. However, I can't help but wonder if those early experiences with "girl" toys, games, and media served as a door to my more feminine side. Even moreso, I can't help but think that all the adults who (intentionally or not) shamed me just for wanting to play with those toys and watch those movies subconsciously suppressed any desire I might have had to dress like a girl too.

So, did anyone else have similar experiences with "girl" toys, games, and/or media?

[Micki_Finn]

It's a pretty chicken-egg assessment. Did you like girl toys because you were girly or did you become girly because you liked girls' toys? The correlation is obvious but I don't think there's any grounds for determining causation.

[DaniChan]

I did, at least to some degee. I quite enjoyed sailor moon and card captor sakura. Those two were the first animes I actually looked forward to watch. I mean, there was not any particular reason I didn't watch other animes, it just happened these were the first (and they always aired in sequence). But I did enjoy other cartoons too like spider man and batman. I was starting to like girly stuff at that point or maybe a bit later...


I don't remember liking girls toys and such, despite having a sister close to my age (which made them available).
As kids, boys and girls played together pretty much always. Playing ball games most of the time.

[Tracii G]

Not sure if "girl toys" has anything to do with why you do what you do.
Most of my friends growing up were girls so I just played with what they played with.
One year I got a dump truck and a back hoe set and we all played with it too as a group and I don't think any of the little girls turned into transmen because of a "boy" toy.
I think a lot of people here try to find excuses to justify why they dress.
All it is is their lack of ability to accept who they are and they like to wear womens clothes.

[BillieJoEllen]

I used to love playing with girls toys and doing girly chores as a child. I loved hanging out with an older sister and I often was made to wear girl's underwear. There were a few times also that I had to dress completely as a girl. I think having gone through these things helped me focus on my feminine nature.

[Tracii G]

So you are trying to blame your sister Billie?

[Lily Catherine]

I wasn't really truly exposed to girls' toys myself (save 'cooking' variety stuff which did absolutely nothing to help my actual cooking skills), but games to a greater extent - I couldn't play soccer to save myself, so I drew and wrote poetry and stories with the girls because I was, at best, a liability to the class soccer team. Fanfiction (mostly a feminine domain as far as I know) still interests me moderately, although it is unfortunate that exceptionally bad writing, especially that involving romance, tends to stand out and give the rest a bad name.

At the time, LEGO was aggressively marketing machinery and adventure, things generally seen as masculine. I lapped them all up because that was most of what was stocked in the stores, and the 'girls'' variants of the time were very badly conceptualised (this has since got better, a whole lot better, so kudos to them). Other construction toys formed a major part of my intake of playthings as well; Erector sets and various knockoffs thereof never failed to excite me. These were blatantly marketed at boys and quite naturally based on machinery and architecture.

I was of the later anime craze, but seemed to identify with high-school slice of life anime because I was literally living it at the time, only gender-flipped. Many of these are aimed (inexplicably) at adult men, perhaps a way of watching the children they never had come of age, but every last inch identifiable and resonating with a high schooler who must have had been in those situations.

I should mention that cooking toys engaged me quite heavily, simply because they revolved around food. Hello Kitty was entirely secondary, if not a cult figure itself in 2000s Singapore. I don't think it did much for me; I didn't hold tea parties or that sort of thing if only because I didn't like tea at first. All of that backfired pretty nicely: I like drinking Chinese tea, and my cooking still needs a lot more practice and learning; trial and error.

Did I end up wanting to present myself as a woman later on? Yes, regardless. I don't think this had anything to do with it.

[ronda]

I think we all need to face the fact that we are what we are because that's how we are hard wired it happened at birth or before not something someone did or didn't do its just how we are I wore panties as much as I could from the time I was 3 or 4 years old grew up playing with truck and working on cars wearing panties as much as I could or when I could find a pair

[Christina D]

I admit that it's dangerous and flawed to suggest that playing with girl toys can or would "make" me or any other man a crossdresser later in life. That's the same kind of harmful rhetoric that suggests sexuality is a choice, which I most definitely disagree with. I don't believe that playing with Barbie and watching Sailor Moon "made" me into anything.

What I am suggesting, however, is that for myself at least, I've always been a little jealous of what society dictates as being acceptable for girls and not acceptable for boys. I just wanted to be like one of the girls (though not necessarily BE a girl). Growing up as I did, being ridiculed for and denied the opportunity to say, "Yes, I'm a boy, but I don't like playing sports with boys. I would rather play house with the girls and pretend to be the mom" definitely had some kind of impact on me. So I guess in some ways, subconsciously as a child who couldn't really comprehend the complex negotiations of gender, I always secretly wished I could be a girl sometimes so that my behaviors weren't deemed weird or unacceptable.

So again, am I suggesting that there's a perfect one-to-one correlation between the toys I wanted to play with and my desire to crossdress? No, but as BillieJo suggested about, toys and media helped me to focus on my feminine nature.

And yes, maybe I am overthinking this, overanalyzing my experiences, and should just accept who I am rather than trying to explain why I am who I am. But I just can't help it, I'm an analyst who just has to question everything! I'm an English teacher, and one common stereotype about English teachers is that we overthink, overanalyze, and seek explanations for things that may never be resolved. :-P

[DIANEF]

I had a mix of 'male' and 'female ' influences in my childhood. I had no father and was pretty much raised by my mum and my aunts, but I had a number of brothers who I spent a lot of time with. I loved construction sets, Lego, cars, trainsets, football, all boys stuff. Then I'd watch TV and be fascinated by what the women I saw there were wearing, especially on programmes like Top Of The Pops or similar shows. I'd mime along to Suzi Quatro, and then build a model tank. It's been said we have this thing with us from birth, I agree and if the feeling is strong enough it will eventually manifest itself in one way or another. It may take years, it may never happen at all, I'm just happy I found out at an early stage of my life.

[Princess Chantal]

Nope, never had interest in toys and games geared mainly for girls. Always was bored when visiting my aunt who had all girls (6).

[ronniegirl]

like Princess I too was never interested in any toys or games intended for girls....in fact just the opposite..played all sorts of "male" games and toys..just goes to show how complex and interesting this phenomenon of CB'ing really is by reading all the different experiences and viewpoints that are posted here..

[Tracy Irving]

Growing up I would watch Electra Woman & Dyna Girl. Does that count?

[sometimes_miss]

The only girl's toys I played with, were whatever belonged to my older sister. Because, well, she got the new toys, and I got the hand-me-downs. So pretty much everything were 'girl's toys' to me. Most of the time I played with small stuffed animals, making up dialogue between them as I played and created all sorts of things I imagined that they would do. Lincoln logs, blocks, barbie, a farm set, model house with little tiny furniture, I didn't start getting my own stuff until I was well into primary school. Lots of stuff was just using my imagination, like the dining room table was a castle, the couch was a mountain I could climb on, used to sit in mom's colander and spin around until I got dizzy, then started all over again.

[Karine]

Concerning the toys, as a child, I usually play with boys stuffs and get involved in boys activities even if I sometimes play with cousin when she was playing with her dolls.
I used to watch boys' TV cartoons and hate the girls' TV cartoons my sister was watching.
So I don't think toys, games had got an influence on me crossdresing.

Concerning the media, maybe. TV commercials or TV shows show how girls' fashion are diverse and how getting dolled up can be fun. So, I always asked to myself why can I have fun too ? Is there any good reason why these things are only for girls ? Growing up, I figure out that the answer is no.

[Nikkilovesdresses]

If it isn't too off-topic, I'm dismayed by the present trend to try to 'educate' people into not buying small children toys with traditional sex-biased characteristics. This misguided PC notion doesn't help little boys become less sexist adults, or prevent little girls from becoming ambitionless housewives. The simple fact is that most little boys like GI Joe and most little girls like dollies for a reason, just as Christina liked the toys she liked for a reason.

Trying to impose an idealised notion of 'what's good for them' has no basis in reality. What influences them far more is the example the parents set. Keep forcing a child to play with the toys you think suitable and you pretty much guarantee building in both resentment and internal conflict- as so many members of this forum can attest.

Thanks for bringing this up Christina, it's a fascinating topic.

[NewBrendaLee]

I had the same interests in girl toys and games growing up. I also enjoyed girl movies over boyish movies and still do.At a young age I had a very strong desire to dress as a girl.

[JustJoni]

I am the oldest, so no hand-me-down stuff from my sisters. I played plenty of boy-games (just plain old 'War' being the most popular), although being small as a child, sports just didn't go over for me until I got my height in high school. I wasn't afraid to get dirty, or play rough (plenty of fistfights, and I joined a medieval combat group for many years).

More than girl cartoons or toys, for me, was the way girls seemed...cherished, I suppose. As a male, we couldn't cry, or admit pain, or show love. If I broke something on my body, or got hurt, I wasn't allowed to cry, nor would any fuss be made over the injury, just a 'stop crying, you're fine'. Now, when either of my sisters wailed for any reason, it was a major federal disaster, complete with media, firetrucks, and every sign of sympathy and compassion. My brother or I could be found carrying our field-amputated arm inside and we would be told to shut up and knock it off...the ladies, not so much, lol.

Now I'm not saying mom and dad didn't pay e enough attention as the girls, and that led to me wanting to dress like one. But, it did...intrigue me as to what all the fuss was about, I guess.

[Beverley Sims]

Girl movies, model trains and electronics.

I knew some other girls who had the same interests.

They were considered weird, me, probably considered more weird.

[Contessa]

I didn't play with to much toys at all cause I didn't always get what I wanted. I the 60's cartoons were for anyone. Although in the 80 and 90's I like animanics and the power puff girls. I liked Popeye and all were my favorites in the 70's. But it was in the late 60's and early seventies that I discovered I looked like a girl(body shape wise) So I began lifting or trying to lift weights. I had no calves and my waist was very small. I worked on rectifying the problem but now realize it wasn't a problem cause I changed my shape but I'm still a girl. I did the same thing going in the Navy. I though they would make a man out of me. That didn't work either. That is why I am 24/7 now I need to make up for lost time. I don't think this is about clothes all my clothes are my clothes feminine and they are all mine, So they must be male clothes. I'm neither a man nor a woman. A feminine male is what he was I am not him. I think I went off topic?

[Cheryl T]

My memories of early childhood were of 2 dolls I had. Yes, dolls and I loved them. I always preferred feminine toys and playing with the girls in the neighborhood.
I had a "Betsy Wetsy" doll. You would feed it with a bottle and it would we itself and you'd have to change it's diaper.betsy.jpg

The other was a "Tiny Tears" doll. tiny.jpg

Seems I had this inner feminine drive long before I began dressing.

[Lana Mae]

No girl toys for me! Mostly boy toys and activities. I did enjoy a few games that may be questionable: Life(you have to get married and raise a family), Candyland (really obsessed with this one). Played house but was always the father or brother, but male role! Hugs Lana Mae

[TrishaTX]

I did like that easy bake oven back in the day!

[Alice_2014_B]

I remember a short phase when I played with some baby dolls with a cousin of mine.
It was like caring for it as my own, I really enjoyed it.
No one said anything; that was when I was really young.

[AllieBellema]

Growing up in my grandparents house... I grew up with my room being my Mom's old room. So, all her girly toys were still there so I played with her Barbies and such. Not to mention, my grandfather would actually WILLINGLY buy me more Barbie dolls and even My Little Pony toys and other girl toys. I wouldn't be surprised if this influenced my thoughts when I started laying my eyes on some historical fashion.