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Thread: I got caught!

  1. #1
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    I got caught!

    Well I was down here typing and my wife came down, and guess what she was holding?
    My size 13 pumps I left in the bedroom. OMG
    I told her I've dressed since 8 and hid it because I could see she didn't like it.
    She said she wanted a man not a GAY GUY and she always thought something was wrong with me.
    I told her I use to dress with friends and haven't dressed for over 18 years but now that the kids moved out I thought I would see If I still liked it.

    Well this is going to be bad. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
    Last edited by Judy-Somthing; 12-17-2016 at 07:40 AM.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  2. #2
    Silver Member Becky Blue's Avatar
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    Oh dear, wish you the best of luck!!
    A.K.A Rebecca & Bec

  3. #3
    Neanderthal in nylons Julie Denier's Avatar
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    I've been in your place. Hope it goes well.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    So sorry to hear. I hope it works out for you.

  5. #5
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    Things are not good.
    She said she always thought I was a little fem which was a turn off.
    That's why we don't have sex.
    Our whole marriage is a lie!
    I pretty sure I have to PURGE tomorrow, And I have so many nice wigs.

    I told her it's who I am and it doesn't make me a bad person.
    She said "your not a bad person it's just not what a women wants in a man"!
    She said "Why would you dress up, you could never look good".
    Last edited by Judy-Somthing; 12-16-2016 at 11:12 PM.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  6. #6
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    That definitely stinks.

    I remember telling my wife, gf at the time, that I enjoyed wearing high heels.
    I was deployed to Kuwait at the time; I emailed her some Ebay links of some heels I liked. Then I just messaged her the huge secret.

    Sorry this probably doesn't help your situation, certainly hope it gets better though.

    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

    -Home Movies
    (cartoon series)

    Shoe size: 9 US women's.
    Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
    Height: 5' 6".

  7. #7
    Silver Member paulaprimo's Avatar
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    ouch!! i'm so sorry Judy!
    not sure if i could possibly offer any sound advice.
    she seems pretty upset so maybe it's time for "the talk"
    explain to her how it's not a question of "looking good"
    as she stated, but more of a feeling. maybe even offer
    to dress for her and let her judge how you look!
    i think you look fantastic and maybe she would also...
    fingers crossed, and hoping!!
    paula

  8. #8
    Member Periwinkle's Avatar
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    How rude of her to say that you don't look good dressed up. Hopefully you don't have to purge...

  9. #9
    Member ReallyLauren's Avatar
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    I'm so sorry Judy.....I've been on your place and it is really difficult. Don't make any hard decisions (i.e. Purging) for a few days until you see how things start to shake out. I'm my case we came to an understanding which isn't completely what I would have hoped for but is still liveable.

    Thinking of you...Hugs, Lauren

  10. #10
    Lady By Choice Leslie Langford's Avatar
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    On one level I feel for you, Judy, but...leaving your Size 13 pumps laying about - in your bedroom, no less - smacks of a subconscious desire to "want" to get caught to put all the years of lying about your crossdressing and the sneaking around out in the open once and for all - the consequences be d*mned. Most of us seasoned crossdressers who have years and years of DADT under our belts have learned to be very adept at covering our tracks so that this very thing never happens. I would have expected the same from someone like you.

    You have just shouted "Fire!" in a crowded theater. I, too, hope it goes well for you now. I see a lot of grovelling and backpedalling in your immediate future with an uncertain outcome. Good luck!

  11. #11
    Banned Spammer
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    Oh so she wants to blame you for the reason you don't have sex?.......................... how convenient.
    I'm really sorry you are going thru this and its going to be hard.
    This is me speaking of course but I would stand up for myself and say dressing isn't illegal and I enjoy it I'm sorry you don't like it but I have done it for longer than I have known you (if that is the case here).
    She knows you aren't gay and you have always been the man in the relationship.
    Sounds to me like she has her smoking gun now so get an attorney ASAP. Don't tell her you have retained one just get one for your own safety.
    Again I am really sorry you have to deal with this.

  12. #12
    Member Shayna's Avatar
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    Good luck. When my wife found my stuff she was forgiving, but after a couple days was kind of wary and freaked out. Same deal, as in you're not a bad person, but not what I thought I was getting myself into. Eventually we settled into DADT and it rarely comes up. She's better with Mme now, as I've been a rock for her the last few months where life has been insane (her mother passed away, she's dealing with a lot of family drama). Hopefully she remembers why she married you in the first place and things settle down.

  13. #13
    Gold Member bridget thronton's Avatar
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    I hope you can work things out to allow each of you some degree of happiness

  14. #14
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    Good luck to you must be a horrible time right now xx

  15. #15
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    "you could never look good"

    Well, its really about feeling good than looking good. Looking good is just a bonus when it happens.

    good luck figuring this all out, Don't purge...Just don't do it, You have needs too, Don't be a cuck, Have a few conversations about it, try to reach DADT status. Ignorance is bliss!

  16. #16
    Member leannejacobs's Avatar
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    So sorry it came out that way, don't jump the gun with your purge, I did that, I felt ashamed of myself and burned most of my things, I should have left it a while, what she's discovered has shocked her, give her some time to digest it, if I had, I would still have all my lovely things, it's taken a while but my wife fully accepts this part of me now and I get to dress in front of her whenever I like.

    Hold a conversation with her and as you've done already explain it's part of you that she fell in love with, even if she didn't realise it, explain it won't go away and that if it could you'd make it happen for her but you must tell everything, don't hold anything back, good luck with it but give it time.

  17. #17
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    Judy, I am so sorry this has happened to you! I agree with Leanne. DO NOT PURGE! Best wishes for a good outcome! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  18. #18
    Super Moderator Raychel's Avatar
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    I am so sorry you are going thru this Judy, I hope everything works for you.

    I will echo what others have said, Do not purge, If you have to find a friend that will be
    willing to keep your things for a while.

    my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress

    "Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"

  19. #19
    Platinum Member
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    Hi Judy, I can't add anything that hasn't already been said, So much for a MERRY CHRISTMAS.

    I hope that things can cool down and be talked about, Please hold off on purging.

    We are all here for you, Keep us advised.>Orchid
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  20. #20
    Feminaut Julie MA's Avatar
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    Judy, so sorry, sort of. Now you have the chance that things will improve and you can open up. Hoping for you.
    Julie

  21. #21
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    I think some women would rather have a guy that cheats on them than to be married to a CD. Why is it that some women stay with their man that beats them, but can't deal with an SO that has a fem side?

    Maybe you'll get her to understand where you're coming from. A lot depends on whether or not you both want to stay together or not. It sounds like there are other issues at stake. Try not to get too stressed out over this ordeal.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member Territx's Avatar
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    Good luck! I had a long comment typed and just deleted it because I don't know all of the factors and, I guess it really comes down to what you and your family want -- you have to make your own path. I do so hope that you find some peace and happiness.

  23. #23
    its important mykell's Avatar
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    dont know your whole situation but as far as purging, dont, hell donate the wigs to a cancer organization at the worst case scenario.

    wont pass judgment on you leaving something out, being a secret squirrel is a tough lifestyle, immeasurable stress and angst,
    have left out my share of things even after my disclosure, hard to live in perfect compliance,

    as far as help the only thing i can offer is to pen a heartfelt letter of what the relationship has meant and the hiding and feelings have been like for you.
    if there was an ounce of compassion and true love for you from her it may be nurtured....if not you gave her your best at reconciling the relationship.
    cant say you didnt try and stating the obvious of coarse its not what a women wants in a man, but what man would make his whole existence that much more difficult by choosing to live this way intentionally....its not like you tried to hurt her....

    best of luck,
    do keep the attorney on speed dial....just in case....
    ....Mykell
    i dressed like a girl and i liked it! crossdressing...theirs an app for that

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member Fiona123's Avatar
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    This may be the best thing that's happened to you in a long time. 🌺

  25. #25
    Platinum Member Shelly Preston's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Judy-Somthing View Post
    Things are not good.
    She said she always thought I was a little fem which was a turn off.
    That's why we don't have sex.
    Our whole marriage is a lie!
    I pretty sure I have to PURGE tomorrow, And I have so many nice wigs.

    I told her it's who I am and it doesn't make me a bad person.
    She said "your not a bad person it's just not what a women wants in a man"!
    She said "Why would you dress up, you could never look good".

    Hi Judy

    Sorry to hear you having problems, I would say don't purge just yet but put your things in storage.
    Please remember your wife has not had a lot of time to think over the conversation. Also I think telling her how early you started might help as you were honest about it.

    Good luck and I hope things work out for both of you.
    Shelly

    Super Moderator....How to tell your partner......Abbreviations

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