My BFF came out to me today.... I'm in AWE....

[Amy R Lynn]

First, hello ladies! It has been forever since I have posted anything on here. I've been away for a while. I hope to visit more often as time permits.

I have known my BFF since we were in first grade. So I have known him for a LONG time (32 years!). I think of him like a brother. I treat him like a brother, for that matter.

My Girlfriend and my BFF's wife are very close friends as well.

I am very secretive about Amy. There are only a handful of people who know about my feminine alter ego. None of my family and close friends know. I keep it this way because I feel that it would serve them no purpose to know. It would only serve my own purpose. There are other reasons too (single father). I could write a book on that. So, I keep Amy hidden and bring her out on special occasions when I can.

My (very supportive) girlfriend called me today and told me that she thinks I need to come out to my BFF. She said that he needs to know about Amy. I went into panic mode immediately. I feared that someone had spilled the beans and I was going to be outed. Naturally I asked her why.... She hesitated and had to think about what she was going to say next (I'm panicking). She then tells me that my BFF is transgender and wants to come out this year. He wants to start taking hormones and living as a woman. I'm in shock. I never saw this coming? How did I miss the signs? I'm in the club, and I know so many trans and CD folks. I never in a million years thought he had a feminine side to him at all. I missed it.

My BFF's wife had told my girlfriend about his desire to come out. He was afraid of how I would react, and feared that I would not be accepting. So he had his wife tell me about it instead. Apparently his wife has known this for 15 years now and is 100% accepting of it all. So I told her about Amy, and it just rolled from there. They weren't as shocked about me being a CD. I had long hair, pierced ears... shave my legs and arms, keep my eyebrows plucked and arched in a feminine style. Yeah... they weren't as shocked as I was.

I talked to him this evening about all of this. He really seems dead set on starting hormones. I explained to him that he really needs to think about that and talk with a therapist before he starts taking them. I know most of us have had these same thoughts. Its so easy to get lost in that pink fog and jump in head first without a second thought. It worries me that he is so eager all at once (or I may be misreading that as well). He has never left his house dressed. There are some definite steps that need to be made before he starts taking hormones. I hope that I can help guide him through this pink fog safely.

What are the chances that we both would be in this same boat and never knew it for 32 years? I'm excited to have my BFF on this journey.
I plan on introducing him to some of my transgender friends and taking him to a couple of meetings that I attend. 2017 is bringing wonderful surprises already!

[Exris]

Your BFF has the greatest friend in you already. You are both lucky.

And we both know this. Before he even takes a step further towards hormones he needs to go out with you dressed and meet other like minded. He also needs to address his sexuality. Even if he is 100% straight that might change after hormones and reassignment. He needs to self examine and understand internally what matters most.

I dont know you. But you have 400+ posts. Id place a bet you know everything I do and perhaps a little more. Help him in any way you are able.

Good luck

[bridget thronton]

You both have good friends and great ladies in your lives

[IleneD]

You are a good and wise friend.
Thanks for sharing that quite unique story.

[Meghan4now]

Amy,

That's quite a bit of news. It is probably not just a coincidence that you know each other and are BFFs. SHE needs you now, and you seem well grounded. I wish the best for both of you. There is a great journey ahead, and it will not always be a walk in the park. Be prepared to help her live through some rough patches. Have courage because you too may be tested.

[LaurenS]

Wow.

Ive often wondered how many I've missed over the years. If we only knew...

[Lana Mae]

WOW! Imagine that! Best wishes going forward to all concerned! Hugs Lana Mae

[Lucy23]

Amy, it's hard to find words... I'm just happy it went so good for both you and your friend. And I couldn't help but notice the abundant acceptance not only on your part, but on your girlfriend's and on the part of the friend's wife as well.

[Jolene Robertson]

Hi Amy,

I'm happy for both of you. Looks like you have a level head and your BFF needs that right now.
Thanks for sharing with us and please keep us posted.

Hugs
Jolene

[mykell]

wow, thats some sobering news, you will have quite an accepting social core, the facilitators at the pflag meetings i attend know tons of resources, taking your BFF with you to your meetings will be a good idea, happy that everything is falling into place for you all....

[sometimes_miss]

I'm in shock. I never saw this coming? How did I miss the signs? I'm in the club, and I know so many trans and CD folks. I never in a million years thought he had a feminine side to him at all. I missed it.

Us closeted people hide it well. We've had a lifetime of practice. Remember, we're about one in what, 42? So you see plenty of crossdressers every day. How many can you spot?

[junetv]

Woe, not only do you have a supportive spouse, you have "supportive" best friend! Lucky girl!!

[Pat]

Wow. That whole post is pretty awesome in so many ways. I'm hoping your friend won't be able to find a doctor who would prescribe without him seeing a therapist first, but these days it's possible. Please encourage him to get his head straight before he starts medicating. The mental side of transition is 'way more important than the physical side.

[Tracii G]

Be a wise guide Amy.

[Acastina]

"You're one too?!?"

"But, but I was afraid to tell you about me!!"

How well we can conceal it, and what rewards we may receive for being brave and honest.

What a great story. Be excellent to each other.

[Nataliebabe]

Welcome Back! Glad that your friend now has someone to lean on! Come to think of it, really, what are the chances that this would happen?

[windshear]

I'm just imagining what I'd do if a friend "came out" to me like the OP described. Yeah, mind blown.

[Abbey11]

Fantastic for you both, as has been said, be a good guide

[Amy R Lynn]

Yeah it is kinda funny. I had thought about coming out to my BFF a couple of years ago. However, I thought it wasn't wise and kept it to myself. I feared that I could loose a very close and good friend. Apparently she had the same exact fear about telling me. The thoughts in our head are definitely our own worst enemy.

Yes, I'm making every effort to encourage her to talk with a counselor or therapist before embarking on the hormone therapy journey. I know how thick the pink fog can get. Sometimes it causes people to jump to conclusions that they later regret. I'm 100% supportive in her transitioning, as long as she does it safely. Well.... wish us luck.

And you all are so right... We are truly blessed to have such a great support group around us. I am amazed more than words can express.

[DaniChan]

Awesome story! You now have even more in common.
I too have a TS friend (have known for a couple years) but in my case he is a FtM TS. All of my friends in that group are super supportive. But even then I haven't told them (anyone actually) about me...

[Tracii G]

BFF is "best female friend" I thought maybe it means something else and I'm clueless LOL

[sara.rafaela]

Best friend forever

[TrishaTX]

thats is great...at least you have each other and that should help!

[Tracii G]

Thanks Sara I wasn't sure.

[Sometimes Steffi]

What are the chances that we both would be in this same boat and never knew it for 32 years?

Stranger things have happened.

I have a CD friend whose brother became his sister when he (my CD friend) was in his fifties.

There was also something similar in an older post here. Man tells wife he's a CD. Wife needs someone to talk to about this. Talks to her GG BFF. The GG BFF's response, "My husband is a CD also."

I'm at the Keystone Conference 2 years ago. I meet this random girl, and we start talking. It turns out she's from my home town, and we went to the same elementary school, middle school and high school together. We graduated HS the same year. We were on the track team together for 3 years. We took showers together, but not in the Sandusky kind of way. When we put this all together, my first question was, "Why didn't you tell me 40 years ago?" But we all know the answer to that question.